Cumming to a kitchen near you....

Xavi6

Link

Semen scallops?

In an article entitled "Semen scallops?" about a semen cookbook, you might expect a lot of jizz-inspired jokes. But I'm not even going to go there. This is just plain disgusting.

Our good friends at geekologie informed us of Natural Harvest: A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes. It's just been released in the States for the tidy sum of $25.

The introduction explains that, "Semen is not only nutritious, but it also has a wonderful texture and amazing cooking properties. Semen is inexpensive to produce and is commonly available in many, if not most, homes and restaurants. Despite all of these positive qualities, semen remains neglected as a food. This book hopes to change that."

And if you're worried about the flavour, don't be! "Some tend to dismiss semen as food and describe it as bitter or salty. This is similar to a person who tastes wine for the first time [and] says it tastes sour. Like all other foods, the tastes and aromas of semen open up and are better appreciated when you are able to compare and discuss the different tastes with other connoisseurs."

Yeah, right.

Sounds yummy.....

javaboy

All the starving people in the world and I've been throwing good food down the toilet for years? I kinda feel bad now

oleras

Xavi6 wrote: »

Link



Sounds yummy.....

Thats what i have been telling her for years !!

Agonist

I knew it was a delicious frosting on biscuits but it turns out it's also a great garnish for spitroasts.





Don't click the link. It's not as funny as you might think. I'm still retching a bit.

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

AckwelFoley

Anyone for snyper soup?

AnonoBoy

Well I've seen a lot of people gargle semen so perhaps there's a market for semen mouthwash?

"Ever wanted that 'I'm a Whore' taste first thing in the morning?
Now you can have it with Jizzerine - the semen flavoured mouthwash!"

Black Swan

A meal for connoisseurs corner sewers.

Turd Ferguson

I hope this becomes popular. If it does I'll be the first to offer my services as the entire countrys Tesco supplier.

funk-you

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

I hope this becomes popular. If it does I'll be the first to offer my services as the entire countrys Tesco supplier.

Pfft, not enough in ya to wet a stamp:pac:

-Funk

javaboy

funk-you wrote: »

Pfft, not enough in ya to wet a stamp:pac:

-Funk

Hey. Every little helps.

themadchef

Even if you told me i could drop 2 dress sizes in a week....


im nevvah going to eat that. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww


Should get you lads to ahem "whip" up the ingredients and i'll shakkle for yee. Instead of pepper sauce you could have warm jizz on your steak... hungry much?

Gandalf23

Thats put me right off having honey on my pancakes ...

pierrot

well, when you think about it, it's pretty much the same as eating snots, which is fine!

BlitzKrieg

javaboy wrote: »

All the starving people in the world and I've been throwing good food down the toilet for years? I kinda feel bad now

I wonder i they mature with age, cause unlike you I have preserved mine across a selection of bedsheets and underpants. I might go check the age of some the preserves

Prof.Badass

at least its not a smegma cookbook.

*shudder*

Xavi6

Xavi6 wrote: »

Link



Sounds yummy.....

reading cosmopolitan? tut tut....

vinylmesh

vinylmesh wrote: »

at least its not a smegma cookbook.

*shudder*

well it is a member of the cheese family.. just substitute.

JIZZLORD

w00

i'm rich!

darling.x

How do these chefs/cooks get the semen into meals. Do they get men to **** into saucepans and over meals. Sure they might as well add pubic hair as a garnish.

darling.x

I've just read your post again. From what i read theres nutrients in semen. Who wants to give me my vitimins for the day.

darling.x

I've just read your post again. From what i read theres nutrients in semen. Who wants to give me my vitamins for the day.

o1s1n

BlitzKrieg wrote: »

I wonder i they mature with age, cause unlike you I have preserved mine across a selection of bedsheets and underpants. I might go check the age of some the preserves

So that's why you wear those goggles.

Overheal

My Compliments to the Chef Jr.

AnonoBoy

darling.x wrote: »

I've just read your post again. From what i read theres nutrients in semen. Who wants to give me my vitamins for the day.

PM sent.

darling.x

AnonoBoy wrote: »

PM sent.

Thanks, i'm looking forward to getting some of that good stuff from you.

brettmirl

http://www.lulu.com/content/4956212

Be sure to read the comments at the end!

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Been doing it here all weekend - ever since the cold snap started the hookers ahve been giving away free blow-jobs just to get something warm into their stomachs...

darling.x

I'm telling ye lads, ye all be rich if you sell bottles of semen over ebay. I dare somebody to do that.

Overheal

dont be daft, it has to be fresh.

Turd Ferguson

If this was actually true and you could good it and it was good for you then I have a question to throw out there.

Guys, would you cook and eat your own semen?

Personally I probably wouldnt (maybe a taste to see what its like) and I would definatly not have anyone elses.

javaboy

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

If this was actually true and you could good it and it was good for you then I have a question to throw out there.

Guys, would you cook and eat your own semen?

Ordinarily I'd say no.... but this recession thing is getting serious. Beggars can't be choosers you know!



Actually if I can get all scientifical for a moment. Semen production grinds to a halt after a couple of days of eh inactivity so which is more efficient for your body:
1. Keeping up your current level of activity and consuming all your produce.
or
2. Zero emissions. That way your body doesn't have to waste energy+nutrients producing the stuff in the first place.

Overheal

youre telling me if you dont rub one out for a week, you kill your sex drive?

javaboy

Overheal wrote: »

youre telling me if you dont rub one out for a week, you kill your sex drive?

I dunno. I never made it past day one. I'm sure a lot of the hormones and whatnot keep getting churned out but I think volume wise, semen production is basically at zero after a few days.

Terry

Overheal wrote: »

youre telling me if you dont rub one out for a week, you kill your sex drive?

No, you kill the potential babies and that makes you a murderer.

javaboy

Terry wrote: »

No, you kill the potential babies and that makes you a murderer.

Mass murderer. There's a lot of baby Overheals in there.

gernon

hmmmm now that explains the new soup in our local Chinese

Cream of Sum Yung Gy

darling.x

gernon wrote: »

hmmmm now that explains the new soup in our local Chinese

Cream of Sum Yung Gy

Fantastic

Overheal

javaboy wrote: »

Mass murderer. There's a lot of baby Overheals in there.

keeping tabs on my sperm count are we

Faith

I think I just threw up a bit in my mouth... :eek:

That's just horrific.

LightningBolt

That's just wrong

gernon

gernon wrote: »

hmmmm now that explains the new soup in our local Chinese

Cream of Sum Yung Gy

very good. i see what you did there.