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Ancestry

IrishMark · 2008-11-23 22:04:34

Hey all, I'm new here and am unsure of all the unofficial rules of the site (for example am assuming thast pieces of writing ar exchanged for critical opinions on other pieces etc...), but this is an attempt at a poem I wrote a few weeks ago and would appreciate some feedback on it. Thanks. Ancestry I often wished to mimic…

23-11-2008 10:04pm

#1

IrishMark

Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 65 ✭✭

Join Date: November 2008

Posts: 31

Hey all, I'm new here and am unsure of all the unofficial rules of the site (for example am assuming thast pieces of writing ar exchanged for critical opinions on other pieces etc...), but this is an attempt at a poem I wrote a few weeks ago and would appreciate some feedback on it.
Thanks.

Ancestry

I often wished to mimic those
who went before in bygone times,
and made their trade by changing prose
into poetic measured lines.
And so beside the beaten track
I jump and skip in leaps and bounds
towards the point where I can try
to make sweet high and lowly sounds.
But from that path I'm led away
as round I see the forest grow
and I am forced to feel my way
with many miles still left to go.
And now I think of turning back-
deserting from the beaten track.

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