I need some dating advice

SmokeyJo84

I'm a 24year old girl, studying in college and working away hard. I'm not the most gorgeous, confident or intelligent girl but I'm fairly happy with my lot in life, have a great set of friends and have my fair share of dates etc.

I recently met a lovely guy through a friend of a friend. We were all out in a pub, I got talking to him by chance and we were glued to each other for the whole night. He's funny, smart and a lovey guy and I definatly fancy him. He asked for my number so I'm guessing he's interested in me too! We've been textin and he's asked me out.

None of this is a problem, I know, but my issue is that I am absolutely terrified about going out on a date with this lovely man. I had a very bad 6month long 'relationship' with a guy last year who turned out to have a girlfriend the whole time I was with him, and also numerous other girls. He treated me horribly but I just couldnt pull myself away from him at the time. I was broken hearted when I found out and I was the one who called it quits but I still feel that it was all somehow my fault,as if i wasn't good enough for him. Silly i know. And although I've been on dates with guys since him, I haven't gone past a first date with any of them for fear of getting hurt and used again.

I dont want to not go on this date because I'm still feeling a lil wounded from my past relationship but the thought of this actually going well and perhaps us going out together is making me sick to my stomach.

sorry if this seems like a completely trivial thread but any advice would be appreciated. thanx

QuadLeo

Go for it. Meet the guy, have a good night out and see how you feel afterwards. By the way you got on the first time you met the date should go well. Why do you feel sick when you think about the date going well? If you're not sure either way maybe organise another night out in the pub with both your mates like the first time you met.

gerTheGreat

Hey,
First thing to remmeber is that not all guys are the same. You seem to have met a good guy and there's mutual interest. All good. I understand that you're a little wary of what could go wrong. It makes sense - once bitten, twice shy and all that.

There is a link to him, (friend of a friend.) Why not ask the friend about him. Maybe he/she can shed some more light. You'll problably find that he's as decent of a guy as you think.

I would recomend going out with him and even if things don't work out, it'll be one more step in forgetting about that git.

Good luck with it.
Ger

littlebug

It does take a while to start trusting people again but the only way to do it is to get back out there! Keep reminding yourself how many men you know who have treated girlfriends like that... probably not very many! You got unlucky and chances are lightening won't strike twice. Good luck and enjoy your date with your lovely new man.:)

SmokeyJo84

Thanks everyone, all very nice and helpful answers! i know i shouldnt expect him to treat me badly...it's just nerve racking when it's someone that i could potentially really like!! if only matters of the heart were simple...but then they probably wouldnt reap such good rewards!

AngryBadger

I say go on the date OP. Try not to think of it in terms of "Oh God, we're going to go on a date, and it'll be wonderful but then 6 months from now...".

It's just a date, you might walk away form it and no longer be interested in this guy. Go out with him, have a fun evening, and try to put your last experience out of your head. In order for things to have a chance you have to try and approach each new guy/situation with an open mind.

Best of luck!