Meet-ups... bad experiences?

bp1989

Hi, I'm a gay guy, 19, just noticed some ads being posted on gaycork.com.

Has anyone ever met up with someone through this type of thing? Is it a very dangerous thing for me to do? I'm pretty inexperienced and wouldn't want something bad to happen etc.

I'd appreciate any genuine responses:)

T Corolla

In reality if you are going to meet someone from these websites you are taking your life in your hands. If you intend to meet someone meet them in a public place or tell someone where you are going. It is best to build up a relationship with the person and not just meet them on the spur of the moment. Please be careful in the future take care

Boston

Do the gaycork.com crowd not organise regular meetups? Why not attend one of theses and get to know people.

bp1989

im not sure...would it be ok to go to one of those alone anyway? i really dont have friends who would be cool with coming along.

azezil

While I can't speak for gaycork.com, I have met up with internet people many times without incident. Best to meet in public, let someone know where you're going, who you're meeting, they will find it weird but it's better to be safe than sorry.

anotherlostie

Speaking from past history, I always left the phone number of whoever it was written down in the kitchen(!), and always asked to see a photo - fairly easy in this age of digi and phone cameras. No photo generally means disaster, and a guy who's (at least) 10 years than his profile says he is. Azezil's advice about meeting in public is absolutely a given too.

azezil

anotherlostie wrote: »

Speaking from past history, I always left the phone number of whoever it was written down in the kitchen(!), and always asked to see a photo - fairly easy in this age of digi and phone cameras. No photo generally means disaster, and a guy who's (at least) 10 years than his profile says he is. Azezil's advice about meeting in public is absolutely a given too.

Oh gawd yeah, never meet anyone who doesn't show you a pic or a few pics preferably.

Boston

bp1989 wrote: »

im not sure...would it be ok to go to one of those alone anyway? i really dont have friends who would be cool with coming along.

I've never met an individual off a dating site or classifies, but I've met literally hundreds of people in real life, through on-line forums. I went to my first boards.ie meet up at the tender age of 16, and it was grand. You will get some absolute freaks at these things but the majority with be perfectly normal well adjusted individuals.

At 19, I have to ask why you're botthering focusing on internet dating sites? Surely the simpliest approach would be the join a local LGBT group or even tag along to college events? These environments tend to be alot safer. If you're in dublin, you could join the belong to group which is specifically for young LGBT people.

bp1989

Boston wrote: »

At 19, I have to ask why you're botthering focusing on internet dating sites? Surely the simpliest approach would be the join a local LGBT group or even tag along to college events? These environments tend to be alot safer. If you're in dublin, you could join the belong to group which is specifically for young LGBT people.

I don't know if I'd actually go through with the internet dating thing, I was just wondering about it.

Yeah, I'm actually in UCC and they do have such a society, I'm thinking of going on to the next thing they have.

Boston

The UCC LGBT people seem friendly enough. I known a fair few of them, the society is/was very active in the day.

Stark

Was in it myself a few years back. It would be hard to give a recommendation as college socs/clubs all go through cycles. When I joined first it was very cliquey, but when I joined again 2 years later, everyone was extremely friendly and I made quite a few friends from it. I'd advise going along to find out for yourself. As far as I know, they're still quite friendly these days.

Weidii

Last night i met the new boyfriend of one of my good friends for the first time and I can honestly say they're smitten with eachother. They met online.

I know there's a danger to meeting a stranger, but it won't always turn out badly. Maybe talk to them over webcam before you meet to see if they're really who they say they are.

opus

bp1989 wrote: »

Yeah, I'm actually in UCC and they do have such a society, I'm thinking of going on to the next thing they have.

I was along at their debate last week on Civil Partnership as a guest of a friend of mine who's studying in UCC. The LGBT society looked like a pretty decent bunch of people from that evening anyway.

Crackerspray

I used to meet up with guys an odd time that I met on chat sites before I had a group of friends to go pulling with.

My advise is to always chat to the person for a week or two before you meet them so your sure you want to go ahead with the meet, arrange to meet in a public place that has plenty of people around and dont let them change the meeting point last minute! Leave a name and number with a friend or someone you can talk to about these personal things or say your going to a party and tell whoever's necessary the place your meeting at. I think the photo thing is a given... and not just one of his ding dong

I met my boyfriend on g-dar and that was over two years ago but Iv also met one or two very strange guys so be careful and if you dont feel comfortable with someone you meet, make up an excuse and hot foot it outta there!

Happy dating!

Rick_

Had some good experiences and also some bad ones, so just be careful. Like it has already been said, get several pictures and a phone number for them before meeting them and even try talking on the phone or webcam before meeting up. When meeting up ALWAYS let a friend or family member know where you are going and who you are going to meet. Even have them ring you at an agreed time to check on you and make sure everything is going fine. If it is, no worries, if it isn't, you can use the phone call as an excuse to leave as "something has happened at home, I need to go".

Don't let horror stories put you off, remember you're only reading them because people have come online to tell them and the interet, and forums in particular, are a great place to vent your anger. Many who have great experiences don't feel the need to come on here and say so so don't believe that they don't happen, just take the necessary prodecures and then go and enjoy yourself. If you play it safe, nothing bad can happen. If you want to talk about it more, feel free to PM.

Aldee84

Listen
Im a 24 yr old guy and I met a guy from online couple of years ago, although it was an ok experience you just have to be very carefull, there are some weirdos out there and I have spoke to them before. Make sure family etc know where you are meeting etc....good luck x

bp1989 wrote: »

Hi, I'm a gay guy, 19, just noticed some ads being posted on gaycork.com.

Has anyone ever met up with someone through this type of thing? Is it a very dangerous thing for me to do? I'm pretty inexperienced and wouldn't want something bad to happen etc.

I'd appreciate any genuine responses:)