Leaving my friend

LegacyUser

I need to move out of home shortly. I own an apartment, and rent a room to a girl. I have to move out for financial reasons.

The problem is, the girl I share with suffers from depression, and I am afraid that if I move out, it will break her heart, as we have lived together for the past three years, and have become very comfortable with the arrangement. She will find it difficult to move in with strangers, or have them move in with her. She may well go to pieces. It's not a relationship, just a convenient living arrangement.

I don't particularly want to move either, but I have no money and no prospects of getting the kind of money I need to make ends meet. It's pretty heartbreaking all round. I need about €2500 a month to keep going, PLUS her rent. I earn less than €1600 a month at the moment, well short as you can see...

I've been hoping something better jobwise would turn up, but it hasn't, and is unlikely to now. So I am on the brink. She will take it badly. I wish I didn't have to do this...

MagicMarker

Why not find a new place with her?

Just say... ''listen, this may come as a shock but with the way things are at the moment, i can't afford to pay the mortgage and i have no other option but to rent to someone who can (or sell), i'm really really sorry!!! I know you can't afford it yourself, so i was thinking, i don't particularly want to live with strangers, do you want to move with me to a cheaper place?''

She's your friend, she'll understand either way. But you're giving her options.

LegacyUser

I'm moving in with mum, there isn't a spare room!

AngryBadger

OP I don't think there's much you can do in this situation. If you're moving home because you just can't afford your repayments, well there's really no way around that, unless your friend is going to hand over the extra EUR900 per month.

It's a tricky situation but try not to beat yourself up, it isn't your fault you're in this situation, and there's only so much you can do for your friend.

sorrywhat

if you are so worried about her then why not move into a cheaper place together and get a few people to rent your apartment to pay the mortgage.

if you are so worried about her dont move back to your mams.

obviously you havnt told your mate yet ?

Cathmandooo

You're very good to be concerned about your friend, it's nice to see people looking out for each other. It seems you do have to move home to your mothers house, you can't go crippling yourself financially when you have the option to move home for the sake of someone else.

Break the news to her asap and why not help her find somewhere that she can be comfortable with. The thought of her finding a place by herself might be daunting to her and I'm sure she would appreciate your help. Go along to viewings and surf the net with her looking at different places. It might make all the difference. Best of luck

Weidii

Just choose your new tenant carefully, even let your friend meet the people who show interest and have a say in who gets it.

Banjoseph

If you let yourself get into serious financial difficulties, which you will eventually by the sound of it, you will end up suffering from serious stress and potentially damaging your health. You need to take care of yourself first at this stage. If your friend suffers from depression she should see a health professional (if she hasn't already). You're not doing her any favours in the long run by delaying the inevitable.

Crumble Froo

aw man, my heart goes out to you. ive recently had to move, and leave my old housemate, and i worry about that dude every day since i left.

i think, cheap accommodation, so's the two of ye can still live together is your best bet. if you have to move in with your mam, i guess you gotta, but make sure and be around for your mate as often as possible, and emphasis as much as you can just how much you're there for her

best of luck.