Landlady

LegacyUser

Hi there,
I am not sure if this is the right forrm to post this issue so apologies if it has to be moved.
I am renting a room off my landlady for the last two months, havent had any problems so far apart from this one.
Before I go further,I think I am a model tenent,I am rarely there, I may spend three nights a week there which would be mostly during the week.If I am there during the week its is late when I come in, I rarely cook there and had never had anyone over to stay. If I am out at night I nearly always stay at a friends. I have to also add that she owns and lives in the house.
So here is the issue,due to the fact that I dont know her that well, I always lock the bedroom door. Its just me, I have always done it, unless I knew the person very well.So three weeks ago, I was away for the weekend, and she came to me on the thurs morning and asked me if I would mind leaving the room open for the weekend.I asked her if there was any reason why and she said in case a cat or dog gets in the window and I need to let them out. This seemed strange cos the bedroom is upstairs. So I just replied that there was no fear of that happening and would ensure that the windows were closed.She then said that she wanted it left open and there was no discussion on the matter. I was a bit peeved and didnt give her an answer.She then came to me an hour later and said that it was ok if I locked the room but to give her the key. Needless to say this was alarm bells and I didnt do it.
So roll on this weekend, I was away for the weekend with work and when I came back last nite she was very distant.I locked the door in front of her this morning before I left and then recieved a text asking me to please leave the room door open. I must also point out that there is no repairs needed in the room, no dampness or anything as I would have no prob leaving it open if that was the case.
Does any one have any knowledge of whats the best way to deal with this? I have checked with the PRTB but because she is the owner and lives in the house, their rules dont apply.
I am really annoyed over this as there is no reason whatsoever to leave it open apart from the fact that I am nearly sure she just wants a good snoop.I have no problem letting her in to the room when I am there but I dont feel comfortable with it when I am not there.

Sorry for the long post but its really annoying me. Any advice would help.I would prefer not to move out as its in an ideal location between my work and my home house.

Motley Crue

I would question her on this straight, and ask her honestly, why the door should be left open? If its just morbid curiousity or distrustfulness on her part, then she doesn't have a right to demand you leave your room open, you are paying for this room and you have a right to keep the door locked so long as you obey the other rules of the flat.

Can I ask, just as an aside, do you smoke any legal or illegal substances...if you do it could be that the smell drifts downstairs? Again, thats just a taught, and I am certainly not accusing you of anything.

Nevyn

I dont' think you are being unreasonable what so ever, but if you can't reslove this you may have to move. I had the same with an owner landlord once, turns out that when I was away for the weekend she had been letting one of her friends sleep in my room, I was not impressed what so ever.

John Mason

I used to rent out a room in my house and personally, i dont like locked doors. this means there is no trust. i am trusting in my house but you dont trust me.

Anyway, it wasnt an issue in my house, as none of the doors had locks on them.


i can understand where you are coming but i know exactly where your landlady is coming from.

you should ask her exactly why she wants the doors unlocked?

i have lived in many, many houseshares over the years in various different comuntries and i would have never considered locking my door

May be i am too trusting but.................

Mr. Incognito

Tell her to get lost. It's her house, but it's your room.

Trinity

You are entitled to your privacy. Tell her if she thinks there is something untoward going on in the room that you are happy for her to inspect it at any time while you are there. Locking doors is a personal preference. I never did it in my house shares tbh but it sounds like she is taking it rather personally. She wouldnt know it was locked or unlocked unless she tried to open the door.

I wonder if she had her bedroom door locked and you demanded she kept it unlocked what would she think. Dogs getting into an upstairs bedroom? Spider dog perhaps.

Gary ITR

When I was sharing an Apartment I asked mt flatmates to lock their rooms. Meant if something went missing I couldn't be blamed

sunnyside

Trinity1 wrote: »

. Dogs getting into an upstairs bedroom? Spider dog perhaps.

I would be furious if she gave me a stupid reason like that and expected me to believe it. I think you should move out and hope the next tenant she gets stays in the house all the time.

I would like the money I could get from renting one of my spare rooms but people generally don't like living with the owner.

LegacyUser

Motley Crue wrote: »

I would question her on this straight, and ask her honestly, why the door should be left open? If its just morbid curiousity or distrustfulness on her part, then she doesn't have a right to demand you leave your room open, you are paying for this room and you have a right to keep the door locked so long as you obey the other rules of the flat.

Can I ask, just as an aside, do you smoke any legal or illegal substances...if you do it could be that the smell drifts downstairs? Again, thats just a taught, and I am certainly not accusing you of anything.

No, I dont smoke and am completely against it.There is nothing strange going on in the room at all.After being away this weekend, I have just realised that she must have checked to see if the room was open or locked as its this morning that this issue has come up and she didnt see me lock it Friday eve.

can I just ask Pink Fluffy Bunny, you said "i can understand where you are coming but i know exactly where your landlady is coming from.". Can I just ask where are ye coming from?
I do lock the doors out of trust, simply because I could be gone away for a few days at a time.I dont want her going thru my things, I mean I would feel like its the same as someone breaking into your house?
I also failed to mention that some lunchtimes I go home for luch and find her parents in the house without her. I mean its not just her I dont trust but if her parents are walking in on spec, who knows who else is.

Curvy Vixen

I think you need to talk to her directly about it. Ask her exactly why she'd like you to leave it unlocked and if she gives you a crazy answer like the flying dog then say that this isn't going to happen and is there any other reason. If you can, do this until you get to the bottom of things.

Then explain to her that you are not locking your door because you don't trust her but because of <insert your reasons>.

I have lived in flat shares in the past and generally will always have locked my door. It generally would not really have had anything to do with flatmates but maybe other people in the house.

This needs to be done face to face until it's resolved ~ texting from either party won't cut it.

If this isn't sufficient for her then you need to move out..

Sugar Drunk

what seems strange is that when you asked her why, she gave you a BS excuse about cats?! Ask her directly why she wants the room open and insist she gives you a proper answer. You should have a right to privacy. If I was renting a roon off someone I did not know that well I would not be leaving my room open when I was away for the weekend

ziedth

Since you are not breaking any rules you have evey right to keep the door Locked, Like another poster suggested say to her that if she has an suspisions you would be happy to show here the room when you are there. Make no more out of it if she brings it up again just say your not comfortable with it,

You dont have to say anymore then that. Is she a registered landlord? if not its always a good way to get one back off if they're over stepping the mark.

missmatty

I very rarely lock my door but if someone is paying their good hard-earned cash for a room I think they are entitled to lock it if they wish. It is their private space and as far as I know, even if you live with a landlady she has no right to enter it without your permission. If she puts up a fuss, I'd say you should leave.

I had a friend renting an apartment. All the girls left for the weekend on the friday and came back on the sunday.

They started noticing little things going on in the apartment. They found a pair of knickers down the back of the couch . It turned out that the landlord was using it as a brothel at the weekends .

gaz wac

ziedth wrote: »

You dont have to say anymore then that. Is she a registered landlord? if not its always a good way to get one back off if they're over stepping the mark.

Dont think she has to be registered if she is only renting out a room, but could be wrong

Leeby

So the reason you want to lock it is that you don't trust her (and you're right, the only way she knew you were locking your door is that she must've tried it). But you can't really tell her that can you? Could you tell her that you're doing it for security, that you have certain valuables in you room and since you're away so often that you'd prefer to know that if someone was to break into the house while she's out they'd be less likely to get into your room? You could say it's something you've always done and didn't een think of it as a potential problem for anyone.

Madame Razz

Mad, anytime i've let a room in my house I have given my tenants the room key and encouraged them to lock their door, as home insurance doesn't cover tenants belongings.

I think perhaps OP you could use this as your excuse, you have every right to lock your door if you wish. When i house shared I always did, not because I didnt trust the poeple I lived with but Its hard to know who is actaully in the house in a house share situation, and lets face it, some people are very nosey!!

Hope it works out for you!

MH

TheBrig

No way. Absolutely no way has she any right to demand you keep your door unlocked. If it was a case of you not locking the front/back door of the premises, agreed but your room?

I've rented in several different houses (some with owner in-situ, others without) and I would lock my door leaving in the morning and if I was going out in the evening, nothing at all against the other tenants/owner but I've heard too many horror stories of tenants "popping into someone's room to just borrow....".

I would LOVE to hear her reason. Bet the sentence starts off with "eh well eh its like my house and eh eh.." (in reality she wants to stamp her foot and go ITS MY HOUSE I WANT TO HAVE A LOOK AT YOUR CLOTHES AND MAKEUP AND SEE WHAT YOU HAVE LYING AROUND ITS MY HOUSE ITS MY HOUSE ITS MY HOUSE!!)

LMC

Im a landlady in my own house, i would NEVER go into my lodgers room, unless i had their permission, I have had 2 and having given them keys for their room,which they didnt use. As they are paying me rent for that room, I feel it is their private space, as long as nothing illegal is going on, i'd go with everyone else and ask her straight out why??? Personally I think it is very strange

Toots

If I were in your position, I'd definitely keep my room locked. And if I were in your landlady's position, I'd be encouraging you to lock your door!! Like Onkle said, if you door is locked and something is missing then you can't blame somebody else! Her BS reasons for needing the door unlocked would have me suspicious though.

If she keeps asking you to keep your room unlocked, tell her you've got your contents insured and that the insurance will only cover them if your room is secured (ie locked) while you are not in the house. (This is true BTW, in case she does a bit of sniffing around to see if you're lying). TBH, I can't see her reasons why she'd want you to keep the room unlocked, unless as in Thaedydal's case, she's letting someone else use your room while you're gone?

You might need to be prepared to move out though if she won't stop hassling you.

Lollipops23

my bf lives with some of his closest mayes but when he's not staying the night he always locks his door. it's to stop randomers crashing in his room which he is paying for!IMHO it's completely acceptable to lock the door.i'd agree with other posters that you should say it's something you've always done and you're a very private person. don't leave it open, it doesn't sound like she's trustworthy!

Firetrap

Very odd indeed. Are there any other rooms in the house? First thing that came into my head was that she has friends to stay at weekends and wants to secretly put them up in your room. I know someone that that happened to (though in a house-share, rather than renting a room).

If she doesn't come up with a good reason, can you move out?

LegacyUser

I used to rent a room from a girl and left the door unlocked always - type of person i am.

Got back after a weekend to discover my sheets had been washed and found a pair of girl's boots under my bed (along with her knickers) - they belonged to a friend of my landlady/flatmate who had been shagging someone (not her bf) in my bed.

Had to leave after that - didn't want to have to keep everything locked up/worried about who was in and out of the house.

Sounds odd that she'd ask you to leave it unlocked - I'd ask her straight out what the issue is. Maybe she just hates doors being locked - but at least you can say why you want to lock it.

RoosterIllusion

Unregistered wrote: »

No, I dont smoke and am completely against it.There is nothing strange going on in the room at all.After being away this weekend, I have just realised that she must have checked to see if the room was open or locked as its this morning that this issue has come up and she didnt see me lock it Friday eve.

can I just ask Pink Fluffy Bunny, you said "i can understand where you are coming but i know exactly where your landlady is coming from.". Can I just ask where are ye coming from?
I do lock the doors out of trust, simply because I could be gone away for a few days at a time.I dont want her going thru my things, I mean I would feel like its the same as someone breaking into your house?
I also failed to mention that some lunchtimes I go home for luch and find her parents in the house without her. I mean its not just her I dont trust but if her parents are walking in on spec, who knows who else is.

Just get another room to be honest. As nice as it may be there are hundreds, if not thousands, of rooms without any of this hassle.

apathetic84

pink fluffy bunny wrote: »

I used to rent out a room in my house and personally, i dont like locked doors. this means there is no trust. i am trusting in my house but you dont trust me.

Anyway, it wasnt an issue in my house, as none of the doors had locks on them.


i can understand where you are coming but i know exactly where your landlady is coming from.

you should ask her exactly why she wants the doors unlocked?

i have lived in many, many houseshares over the years in various different comuntries and i would have never considered locking my door

May be i am too trusting but.................

tbh i have lived in many houseshares but one in particular a friend of another tenant walked in on me and my b/f whilst we were asleep.
after that night i always locked my door

Venom

OP you should probley start looking around for a new place as your landlady sounds like she is up to no good pulling that short of crap on you.

Darragh29

Leave it open but hide in the room. If she's snooping, at least you'll know about it. I'd be outa there if I was you in any event, she sounds like a loo laa...

towel401

what i don't understand is why doesn't she have a spare key. we used to rent out a house and we have a spare key for every day of the week. when people went away for the day we would all sneak in and go look through their stuff.

No only messing about that part but i wouldnt want a locked room in my house either. in case something caught fire even. an empty locked room in your house you can't open is not a good thing. i can't really blame her but she should have a spare key

Darragh29

Darragh29 wrote: »

Leave it open but hide in the room.

Hilarious mental image. I can just imagine it. Unlocking the door, and then as quick as you can, sliding under the bed. Holding your breath to try and not make any noise :pac:




OP, my completely original advice, would be to ask her straight out why she wants it locked, and in the mean time, be prepared to move out.

quank

Most sensible thing is to just ask her again. If she goes on about mutant dogs again, leave as soon as possible because she sounds wacko. Or else agree and set up secret cameras and see what she wants to do so badly in your room.

She Devil

The cheek of her to demand you keep it open. you are paying for the room it is up to you what you want to do with it. The room is now not hers. You have your own rights.
I always locked my bedroom even living with my closest friends.

Move out OP, you don't need to feel that uncomfortable.

mags16

It sounds to me like trust has completely broken down between you and your landlady.

I rent rooms in my house to short term lodgers and I would not be keen if they locked their rooms. If a lodger left their window open and disappeared for a few days, I would want to go in and shut it, for security and heat conservation reasons. It has also happened that a cat has climbed in the 1st floor window and occasionally, birds have flown down the chimney. What if a lodger left curling tongs or a bar heater plugged in and a fire started? I would want to be able to get in the room and sort it out.

None of my lodgers have ever asked for a key because that is not the kind of house it is. I don't want to live in a house that doesn't have an open, harmonious and trusting atmosphere. The bathroom doesn't even have a lock! We have a system that if the door is shut, it's occupied, if it is open, it is vacant! I respect their privacy and would never go into their rooms without telling them. I couldn't live with someone that didn't trust me.

Darragh29

mags16 wrote: »

It sounds to me like trust has completely broken down between you and your landlady.

I rent rooms in my house to short term lodgers and I would not be keen if they locked their rooms. If a lodger left their window open and disappeared for a few days, I would want to go in and shut it, for security and heat conservation reasons. It has also happened that a cat has climbed in the 1st floor window and occasionally, birds have flown down the chimney. What if a lodger left curling tongs or a bar heater plugged in and a fire started? I would want to be able to get in the room and sort it out.

None of my lodgers have ever asked for a key because that is not the kind of house it is. I don't want to live in a house that doesn't have an open, harmonious and trusting atmosphere. The bathroom doesn't even have a lock! We have a system that if the door is shut, it's occupied, if it is open, it is vacant! I respect their privacy and would never go into their rooms without telling them. I couldn't live with someone that didn't trust me.

The bathroom doesn't even have a lock??? Do you make this policy clear to folks you are renting to, before they make a decision to live in your house??? It's nice thinking we all trust each other and everything is rosy, but a lot of people cannot be trusted and I think what you have stated above could be interpreted as putting your hand out to be slapped. One fundamental benefit I would expect from paying rent is privacy. If I don't trust people I hardly know, I would think that this would be respected. In 2008, you can't go around leaving doors open and running an open house in my opinion.

mags16

Darragh29 wrote: »

The bathroom doesn't even have a lock??? Do you make this policy clear to folks you are renting to, before they make a decision to live in your house??? It's nice thinking we all trust each other and everything is rosy, but a lot of people cannot be trusted and I think what you have stated above could be interpreted as putting your hand out to be slapped. One fundamental benefit I would expect from paying rent is privacy. If I don't trust people I hardly know, I would think that this would be respected. In 2008, you can't go around leaving doors open and running an open house in my opinion.

The bathroom thing sounds daft, I know. When I first bought the house, it was a bit of a wreck and the bathroom lock was the least of my troubles. I just never got round to it. Nobody has never accidentally walked in on anybody else.

How could the lack of a bedroom lock could be interpreted as putting your hand out to be slapped? Lock or no lock, they can still rob my telly or fridge freezer or the Waterford Crystal ( if I had any).

The worst thing that has happened was when I caught a lodger using my laptop without asking. I was very pissed off. I never had him stay with me again.

I'm lucky in that my short term lodgers are in a related business to mine. They stay with me when they work in the city. The same people come back again and again. Often they book accommodation through their employer. If there was a serious problem, I would report it to the company. Fortunately, that has never happened. In fact, the vast majority of my lodgers become great friends.

But back on topic, I couldn't live with someone who insisted on locking their bedroom.

Darragh29

mags16 wrote: »

The bathroom thing sounds daft, I know. When I first bought the house, it was a bit of a wreck and the bathroom lock was the least of my troubles. I just never got round to it. Nobody has never accidentally walked in on anybody else.

How could the lack of a bedroom lock could be interpreted as putting your hand out to be slapped? Lock or no lock, they can still rob my telly or fridge freezer or the Waterford Crystal ( if I had any).

The worst thing that has happened was when I caught a lodger using my laptop without asking. I was very pissed off. I never had him stay with me again.

I'm lucky in that my short term lodgers are in a related business to mine. They stay with me when they work in the city. The same people come back again and again. Often they book accommodation through their employer. If there was a serious problem, I would report it to the company. Fortunately, that has never happened. In fact, the vast majority of my lodgers become great friends.

But back on topic, I couldn't live with someone who insisted on locking their bedroom.

Well I learnt this lesson unfortunately but someday you'll have someone in your house who, unknownst to you, has a bit of a coke habit and is fundraising for their next weekend on the town, and they won't rob your Waterford Crystal or your CD Player, they'll wander into one of those unlocked bedrooms and take a few quid out of the first wallet they see. That's what I mean by putting your hand out to be slapped.

LegacyUser

To say that you think trust would have broken down if the person locks the door is mad.

I have lived in a number of flatshares over the years and I have never locked my door. But I still respect the right of someone to do it. And in the case of the OP - why give him a key if she didn't want it locked?!

But OP, I think you just need to ask her why she prefers it to be locked?

Locking the door in a house of multiple occupancy is a good idea for a number of reasons... insurance firstly. As someone else said, each tenant needs their own insurance and you get cheaper insurance if your room has a lock (however HMOs are supposed to have doors which don't lock with a key and can be opened easily from the inside due to fire risk). Also, privacy and protection of possessions. I'm sure mags that you are a trustworthy lady and that the majority of your lodgers are also but you never know - some people just go a little too far with the idea of privacy and respecting other people's space.

I've had instances of people going into my room when I wasn't there. I didn't mind if it was my friend borrowing my hairbrush - I did the same with her! - but I didn't like it when it was someone at a party sleeping in my bed! That's the unfortunate twist to it.

But yeah, bottom line - locking your door is a personal choice and one I'd understand more if you were living as a lodger perhaps. Or if you were in a HMO with proper locked fire doors.

Oh and no lock on the bathroom door... that's a bit bizarre for me. As is keeping your doors open just to let people know that the room is vacant.

Raskolnikov

pink fluffy bunny wrote: »

i have lived in many, many houseshares over the years in various different comuntries and i would have never considered locking my door.

I used to have the same attitude as you, I don't anymore though. Even if I completely trusted a housemate, I would always lock my bedroom door if I was going away. The reason is, because while you may trust your housemate, you might not trust friends of theirs who visit. I had one particular incident in a house share where friends of my house mate went into my room and stole things.

Unregistered, you are not at all being unreasonable here. I think it would be best if you left to be honest. You could fight this, but it sounds like it would be more hassle than it's worth

mikemac

Been in countless houseshares and always locked my door.
Even when sharing with mates or people from my college class who I'd known for years.

Firstly, if something goes missing it absolves them of blame so realy it's a good thing.
And also, maybe you trust your housemates but do you know all their mates and the people they might invite back from the pub? You don't know them and you might never seen them again if something goes missing.

This landlady tried to get into your room when you weren't there so they discovered the room was locked. Why?
And they then they had a stuipid reason about animals getting in through a first floor window, hard to respect someone who won't tell the truth.

mags16 wrote: »

The bathroom doesn't even have a lock!

:eek:

mags16

I just remembered that when I first bought the house, none of the doors even shut properly! So my first lodger had to sleep with her door ajar. She didn't mind and her rent was cheap. I got them fixed pretty quickly.

Darragh29 wrote: »

they'll wander into one of those unlocked bedrooms and take a few quid out of the first wallet they see. That's what I mean by putting your hand out to be slapped.

I'm sorry for you that you've had some bad experiences and I suppose my situation is different to the norm. If a lodger was nicking a few quid from a wallet, I'd be down on them like a ton of bricks. Word would spread in the business and their future work prospects would be effected.

I've been renting rooms in my house for 8 years and never had a serious problem. I'm not stupid, though. I never have large amounts of money hanging around and I've passed on the gold plated bathroom fittings! My work schedule isn't 9 to 5, so I can be home any time. Also, I try to rent to people in their 30s. Maybe I should be looking at their septums for signs of a coke habit!

I do understand locking doors if a group of strangers are sharing a house. But it's not for me.

tbh

It's

"Why would she want you to leave the door unlocked unless she's up to no good?"

vs

"Why would she want to leave the door locked unless she's up to no good?"

LegacyUser

Hi there,
Many thanks for all the replies.
I spoke to her last nite and basically asked her why she wanted the room unlocked.She said that it was her house and that she had the right to request the door is left open or that she has the key.Still didnt answer my question, so she said that she didnt need to answer it cos she was the "controller" of the house!She then asked me why I wanted it locked,I explained that it was for privacy and security which I was entitled to. I also told her that I had no problem with her going into my room with my permission, and pointed out an incident where this was the case(a decorator was in to finish wallpaper in the room) and this would be the case in normal circumstances.
To shorten the story,she said that she had now "rooted out" the spare key to the room. I presume she did this the weekend that I was away so there is no doubt in my mind that she has been in around the room.She said that the key to the room was no longer an issue and I could stay if I wanted?So with that I gave her my notice to move out.She then had the cheek to ask me if I was returning to the house that night, I said that I didnt know, that I was going home to my parents for the evening. I also told her that people have the right to privacy in the house they are renting and to come and go as they wished. I really have been the model tenent so far,I mean who would complain about getting a months rent from a tenent and then the tenent rarely being there.I wish that I knew about the insurance not covering a tenents belongings before last nite but I am sure that I will get the chance to mention that before I leave, I will make a point of it.
For the one poster that said it was a matter of trust and that they wouldnt rent out a room to someone who locked their door out of trust,I am glad that you are sure of who you are living with. You are very lucky.I also mentioned that her parents had a key and have been in around the house during the day, if they have a key who knows who else has.
I also found out by accident that she has had six people move in and out in the last year,she only rents out one room in the house. Serious alarm bells there.
Problem sorted anyway,I am moving out. Again many thanks for all the replies.

Silverfish

tbh wrote: »

It's

"Why would she want you to leave the door unlocked unless she's up to no good?"

vs

"Why would she want to leave the door locked unless she's up to no good?"

That's all well and good, but that does not take into consideration that one party is paying X amount of money to the other for the right to live there.

OP, glad to hear you reached a conclusion to this, it sounds like the best option really as its doubtful you would ever have had peace of mind while living there.

SpookyDoll

Man, you are well better off out of it. She is a psycho who has totally lost touch with reality. I am not suprised she has been through 6 tenants in a year.

Ive rented a room in my house out and it would be NONE of my business to stop a tenant locking the door!!!

anyway, She was bang out of line, I am glad you didnt let her away with it!

Judes

So forget about all this "trust" issue of them snooping around your room. Up to a few months ago I was the landlady living in my house and I had different lodgers in over the years. They never locked their doors, they all had keys in their doors - but never did. (And I had spare keys to each room also).

I never went "snooping" but lodgers are not property owners and my experience is that they are usually quite careless, especially when it comes to electrical goods - one of the number one causes of fire! I've had to enter a room where a laptop wasleft on - buzzing over my head all night long and turn it off. Where radio clocks were left on, again radio going off. Sometimes if they opened their bedroom door, the hall would fill with a horrible stale smell. So at times, when they weren't in the house, ie if I knew they were away for a weekend I had to go in and open their windows wide - because their rooms weren't being cleaned and they were stinking. So what you may say, it's their room, they can live whatever way they like in their room - but when they left the property and moved on - I was always left trying to fumigate rooms out. You'd never know exactly how dirty/lazy they were until after they left and you'd see the dust/dirt/grime/mould.

One had practically moved his girlfriend in - though the rule was - she could stay over one or two nights a week, as we all had to respect each other's privacy. But she was there 6/7 nights a week. Then I discovered she was in the house when nobody else was there. She wasn't paying rent - she had no entitlement to be left alone there.

The amount of times I came home to find the front door unlocked - or the back door. I stated no-smoking - and discovered one was sneakily smoking in the bedroom, probably hanging out the window - but finding cigarette butts later..................

So it's not that live in landlords are nosey - we're protective of our property which is our home. You talk of trust - and that landlords' don't trust their tennants - well, it's a two way street. But when my last lodger moved on last year I thought to myself, I'd rather have a bit less cash in my pocket and know that my house is a bit safer. J

LegacyUser

I had the same problem with an over bearing landlord. She didnt like when my boyfiriend stayed over, when I locked the room, when I put on the heating etc. I was so fed up and I dreaded going "home." In the end I moved out because that is the only real option you have here. You are obviously not compatable (she sounds like a control freak and likes everything her own way) and the only way you are going to be happy again is to find somewhere new. When you are leaving tell her it is because of her unreasonale behaviour and that she was very unprofessional as a landlord. In my situation, the landlord in question gave me back €5 of a €400 deposit because she said I didnt clean the room "to standard." It was spotless. I wish you the best of luck with finding a new place, there are loads out there now.

LegacyUser

Judes wrote: »

So forget about all this "trust" issue of them snooping around your room. Up to a few months ago I was the landlady living in my house and I had different lodgers in over the years. They never locked their doors, they all had keys in their doors - but never did. (And I had spare keys to each room also).

I never went "snooping" but lodgers are not property owners and my experience is that they are usually quite careless, especially when it comes to electrical goods - one of the number one causes of fire! I've had to enter a room where a laptop wasleft on - buzzing over my head all night long and turn it off. Where radio clocks were left on, again radio going off. Sometimes if they opened their bedroom door, the hall would fill with a horrible stale smell. So at times, when they weren't in the house, ie if I knew they were away for a weekend I had to go in and open their windows wide - because their rooms weren't being cleaned and they were stinking. So what you may say, it's their room, they can live whatever way they like in their room - but when they left the property and moved on - I was always left trying to fumigate rooms out. You'd never know exactly how dirty/lazy they were until after they left and you'd see the dust/dirt/grime/mould.

One had practically moved his girlfriend in - though the rule was - she could stay over one or two nights a week, as we all had to respect each other's privacy. But she was there 6/7 nights a week. Then I discovered she was in the house when nobody else was there. She wasn't paying rent - she had no entitlement to be left alone there.

The amount of times I came home to find the front door unlocked - or the back door. I stated no-smoking - and discovered one was sneakily smoking in the bedroom, probably hanging out the window - but finding cigarette butts later..................

So it's not that live in landlords are nosey - we're protective of our property which is our home. You talk of trust - and that landlords' don't trust their tennants - well, it's a two way street. But when my last lodger moved on last year I thought to myself, I'd rather have a bit less cash in my pocket and know that my house is a bit safer. J

In this case she is nosey, I am sorry to say.All the signs point towards that. She would not have known that the room was locked unless she had tried to gain access on several occasions.Its actually quite sad really.She is also always at the house.And the end of your post, you say that landlords are protective of their property, well does a tenant not have the same right?There was a number of burglaries in the estate lately also.The landlady also knows that I have had nobody over to stay(because she is always there), she also knows that I dont smoke as I pointed out in one post.I am the one worried about my possessions being safe as I dont know who has been in and out of the house during the day or over weekends that I am not there.I mean to have had six people in and out, there could be a lot of keys flying around.

LegacyUser

I once lived with a great Landlady,
We got on really well and became the best of mates ...

However after about 9 months I noticed things going missing out of the room when Id be away at weekends, her two year old son was taking them out of the room and hiding them!

Then I found out she'd been letting other people stay in the room when I wasn't there!!!

She didnt see anything wrong with this ...

skywalker

Judes wrote: »

I've had to enter a room where a laptop wasleft on - buzzing over my head all night long and turn it off.

Im sorry but are you honestly claiming a laptop being on in another room, on another floor by the sounds of it, was keeping you awake?

Ste.phen

skywalker wrote: »

Im sorry but are you honestly claiming a laptop being on in another room, on another floor by the sounds of it, was keeping you awake?

If the fans or HDD are spinning, it's very easy to hear a laptop from fairly far away, especially if it's the only thing making noise, is on the floor, or is on a solid object like a table

skywalker

Ste.phen wrote: »

If the fans or HDD are spinning, it's very easy to hear a laptop from fairly far away, especially if it's the only thing making noise, is on the floor, or is on a solid object like a table

In another room? Thats ludicrous.

Malice

skywalker wrote: »

In another room? Thats ludicrous.

Not through the thin plasterboard walls that are all too common in modern Irish houses.