Joking about

Quazzie

I recently got reported to my boss in work by a 'colleague' because he drives a Micra and we were talking the other day and I asked him if that was a family sized box or just a Snack box. Further banter ensued and I asked him how many coupons from cereal boxes he collected to get it.

Does anyone else feel that its wrong that I got a verbal warning because of it. I mean its a Micra FFS, and he's a guy!

foxshooter243

Quazzie2002 wrote: »

I recently got reported to my boss in work by a 'colleague' because he drives a Micra and we were talking the other day and I asked him if that was a family sized box or just a Snack box. Further banter ensued and I asked him how many coupons from cereal boxes he collected to get it.

Does anyone else feel that its wrong that I got a verbal warning because of it. I mean its a Micra FFS, and he's a guy!

Its way over the top imo, take it further.....Union perhaps..

ScumLord

Your completely in the right. Only girls can drive Micras and I do mean girls. Once they hit puberty they should really have grown out of them.

Roadend

Tell your boss the micra owner touched you in an inappropraite manner.

4zn76tysfajdxp

Quazzie2002 wrote: »

I recently got reported to my boss in work by a 'colleague' because he drives a Micra and we were talking the other day and I asked him if that was a family sized box or just a Snack box. Further banter ensued and I asked him how many coupons from cereal boxes he collected to get it.

Does anyone else feel that its wrong that I got a verbal warning because of it. I mean its a Micra FFS, and he's a guy!

Slash his tyres.

MagicMarker

Quazzie2002 wrote: »

we were talking the other day and I asked him if that was a family sized box or just a Snack box.

You sure you didn't get a verbal warning for telling shít jokes?

Vain

He sounds like a bit of a girl to report you for that. Maybe thats why he drives a Micra. Or else maybe he was bullied all his life and you put the final word in to break him and now his hell set on making you pay:p

Quazzie

Frada, Just the AH responce I needed to cheer me up.



\ grabs Bill hook

_blank_

What a prick he was for reporting you.

Ignore him infuture, and only talk to him about business related stuff.

Fúcking idiot.

Dinter

Sounds like a moany little twat to me. The only way to deal with him now is to instigate a widespread and subversive bullying campaign against him.

minidazzler

OK Children, For this next exercise you will need a litre of Petrol, a rag and a lighter.


Break the window on the car, You may want an adult to do this for you,
Pour petrol in and spread it around, make sure not to cut yourself on the broken glass.
Light the rag on fire and wait until there is a good flame going.
Toss rag in car.

Now, this is the most important part,
Walk away in a cool fashion and light a cigarette just as the car blows up.

capedcrustacian

I'm a Micra driver and i'm on your side mate!

When you buy a Micra you have to sign a form waiving your right to being embarrassed, there is also an optional contract one can sign that states one has to be the first to mock themselves for having a Micra (to save face).

I own one, I love it, and it's soooo handy the way it fits in my handbag...I save a fortune on parking

She Devil

He wouldnt have reported you if he was ok about it,
what away of drawing attention to it, What a sap!

Shmuck

Colton Ancient Tearfully wrote: »

Slash his tyres.

or just put his car in your pocket and walk off

Turd Ferguson

Colton Ancient Tearfully wrote: »

Slash his tyres.

I thought Micras have solid rubber tyres, like that of a pram?

AnonoBoy

Quazzie2002 wrote: »

I recently got reported to my boss in work by a 'colleague' because he drives a Micra and we were talking the other day and I asked him if that was a family sized box or just a Snack box. Further banter ensued and I asked him how many coupons from cereal boxes he collected to get it.

Does anyone else feel that its wrong that I got a verbal warning because of it. I mean its a Micra FFS, and he's a guy!

Where you wearing pants when you were making these jokes? Maybe he wasn't you mocking his car that made him uncomfortable - perhaps it was your schlong slapping about as you did it that pushed him over the edge?

Quazzie

The jokes on him thought because I pissed in his windscreen washer bottle.

Vain

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

I thought Micras have solid rubber tyres, like that of a pram?

Only the very top of the line model.

funk-you

I learned a long time ago to only talk shop in work. EVERYTHING else can end up coming back to bite you in the ass.

-Funk

AnonoBoy

funk-you wrote: »

I learned a long time ago to only talk shop in work. EVERYTHING else can end up coming back to bite you in the ass.

-Funk

I'd hate to have a job like that. My work place is a hot bed of intense political and cultural discussion all the time.

I'm a cleaner in the Dail

Vain

AnonoBoy wrote: »

I'd hate to have a job like that. My work place is a hot bed of intense political and cultural discussion all the time.

Ah so thats why you live in ah.

Turd Ferguson

Here is what you do. Buy a little toy car that resembles a Micra and is the same colour as his. You have 2 options now...


1: Steal his car keys and move his car somewhere else. Then put the toy car in his parking space. Wait for him to come out and take pictures of the look on his face.


or

2: When he is at his desk walk up to him and say "Dude, your car is blocking someone in the car park. But its okay, I moved it for you". Then proceed to drop the toy car on his desk and walk off triumphantly.

Vain

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Here is what you do. Buy a little toy car that resembles a Micra and is the same colour as his. You have 2 options now...

2: When he is at his desk walk up to him and say "Dude, your car is blocking someone in the car park. But its okay, I moved it for you". Then proceed to drop the toy car on his desk and walk off triumphantly.

Now thats a good one.

m@cc@

Quazzie2002 wrote: »

I recently got reported to my boss in work by a 'colleague' because he drives a Micra and we were talking the other day and I asked him if that was a family sized box or just a Snack box. Further banter ensued and I asked him how many coupons from cereal boxes he collected to get it.

Does anyone else feel that its wrong that I got a verbal warning because of it. I mean its a Micra FFS, and he's a guy!

I detest Micra's and their drivers in equal proportion.

_feedback_

funk-you wrote: »

I learned a long time ago to only talk shop in work. EVERYTHING else can end up coming back to bite you in the ass.

-Funk

I would, only I don't work in a shop.........

Dinter

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Here is what you do. Buy a little toy car that resembles a Micra and is the same colour as his. You have 2 options now...

Now while both of those are great ideas they do involve some work in terms of sourcing materials etc. A different way to go is as follows:

• Take off shoe.
• Take off sock.
• Pick stapler up off desk.
• Put stapler in sock.
• Put shoe back on.
• Pick up sock and hold tightly behind back.
• Walk over to whingebag and stand behind him.
• Start humming loudly until he turns around to give out.
• Introduce whinge bag to sock at full force in a downwards, 45 degree angle aiming at eyes and bridge of nose.
• Scream "You whingy piece of whining shoite crawling to the boss about me, I'll fukin kill you and bathe in your fukin blood".
• Repeat until dragged away by colleagues or total skull collapse.
• Go to doctor for loads of free sick holidays due to your "mental collapse".

Ishmael

MagicMarker wrote: »

You sure you didn't get a verbal warning for telling shít jokes?

+ 1

While i can see how someone could get a chuckle out of them, i think they aren't really that funny at all at all(not to my comedic tastes). Not that they're that offensive either but if you were making persistant jokes about it, then i can see how someone would be irritated by it.

shenanigans1982

Ishmael wrote: »

+ 1

While i can see how someone could get a chuckle out of them, i think they aren't really that funny at all at all(not to my comedic tastes). Not that they're that offensive either but if you were making persistant jokes about it, then i can see how someone would be irritated by it.

Your icon make me think your Turd Ferguson....then I realise your posts are serious.

The reaction to the OP seems to be way over the top, I thought I was hard done by when I was reported for sticking a workmates cup to the canteen counter in work with glue. He deserved it though.

Turd Ferguson

shenanigans1982 wrote: »

Your icon make me think your Turd Ferguson....then I realise your posts are serious.

Yes, I suggest we fight to the death to see who can keep the Mortal Kombat dragon...although if you check my sig I'm (apparently) the fatality of the Noc forum so watch out!!!

Ishmael

Turd Ferguson wrote: »

Yes, I suggest we fight to the death to see who can keep the Mortal Kombat dragon...although if you check my sig I'm (apparently) the fatality of the Noc forum so watch out!!!

Ah you can have it, i always sucked at MK anyway.

Quazzie

Ishmael wrote: »

Ah you can have it, i always sucked at MK anyway.

VERDICT: Flawless victory

Slidey

I got a verbal warning for drilling a hole in the a workmates spoon...

wouldnt mind but the combination of sh1t drill bit and good spoon made it hard work.

AlmightyCushion

Quazzie2002 wrote: »

I mean its a Micra FFS, and he's a guy!

That's like dividing by zero, it's just not possible.

MJOR

What a whingebag! A verbal warning a bit OTT. He'll oonly ever drive a micra.. he is a big girls blouse

Ann22

What a barefaced tit! He reported you for that?!! You should tell the whole place so everyone know's he's a dry sh*te who can't take a joke! Your boss probably secretly thought he was being silly but had no choice but to say it to you in case he was accused of condoning bullying. Years ago a mad cow I worked with told our superviser I told her to f*ck off. I wouldn't mind but I never even spoke to the girl before. She totally made it up!:eek:She never even got on my nerves before this so there was no dirty look or anything she could've developed on. I was so upset at the time.

Ross_Mahon

The Micra is a nuns car!

pablomakaveli

Heres what you should do.

Buy a micra (bear with me a second) and then when the boss asks you about the incident say "i did'nt say that. i own a micra too so why would i make jokes about micras?". The boss should accept this.

Now, when the boss leaves the room give your twat of a colleague a swift hard kick in the balls. When he reports you to the boss (which he will) tell the boss " i did'nt kick him in the balls. I have balls too so why would i do that?". your boss should again accept your excuse and will fire your colleague for being a prissy little b*tch. he will then promote you with a big fat raise.

there problem solved.

diamondp

just take the batteries out and remove the handle for carrying it. that should really pis* him off. :D:D

Ishmael

This Thread reminds me of the episode of the simpsons where Nelson laughs at the really tall guy in the tiny car. :pac::D

Couldn't find it on Youtube