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Bart Simpson !

  • 21-10-2008 12:11pm
    #1
    dak
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,577 ✭✭✭


    Ever wonder what Bart Simpson writes on the chalk board during the opening credits of each episode... heres a few !


    I will not carve gods.
    I will not spank others.
    I will not aim for the head.
    I will not barf unless I'm sick
    I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty.
    I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge.
    I will not conduct my own fire drills.
    Funny noises are not funny.
    I will not snap bras.
    I will not fake seizures.
    This punishment is not boring and pointless.
    My name is not Dr. Death.
    I will not defame New Orleans.
    I will not prescribe medication.
    I will not bury the new kid.
    I will not teach others to fly.
    I will not bring sheep to class.
    A burp is not an answer.
    Teacher is not a leper.
    Coffee is not for kids.
    I will not eat things for money.
    I will not yell "She's Dead" at roll call.
    The principal's toupee is not a Frisbee.
    I will not call the principal "spud head".
    Goldfish don't bounce.
    Mud is not one of the 4 food groups.
    No one is interested in my underpants.
    I will not sell miracle cures.
    I will return the seeing-eye dog.
    I do not have diplomatic immunity.
    I will not charge admission to the bathroom.
    I will never win an Emmy.
    The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy.
    All work and no play makes Bart a dull boy.
    I will not say "Springfield" just to get applause.
    I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers.
    My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man.
    I will not go near the kindergarten turtle.
    I am not deliciously saucy.
    Organ transplants are best left to professionals.
    The Pledge of Allegiance does not end with "Hail Satan".
    I will not celebrate meaningless milestones.
    There are plenty of businesses like show business.
    Five days is not too long to wait for a gun.
    I will not waste chalk.
    I will not skateboard in the halls.
    Underwear should be worn on the inside.
    The Christmas Pageant does not stink.
    I will not torment the emotionally frail.


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