Mixed signals....

GoSlowJoe

Hi,

I've got a woman issue that I thought someone might help me with. I work in the same company as this girl and we exchange a few looks, hello's and so on whenever we see each other. Recently we went for a couple of drinks after work as I was seeking her advice on something non-work related. It all went fine and I asked her if she would like to do it again some time. She said yes and we went our seperate ways.

So I sent her a txt a couple of days later and asked if she wanted to meet up some weekend and there was no reply. I asked her then next time I saw her in work and she said she had been too busy to reply. Fine I thought.

A few weeks went by and we exchange knowing glances and smiles, small talk and flirty comments etc... So she comes back from a holiday and when she see's me slows down for a chat and she has a really nice way of looking at me. Ok I think, still game ball. Send her a txt a week later to see if she'd like to go to the cinema some eve and a couple of days later I get a txt back to say she's really busy for the next couple of weeks and had no credit to reply. (She has a genuine reason for being busy that I am aware of but wheter or not thats a handy exscuse...!?)

For ages there's been flirting and knowing looks, big smiles and that 'Hey...' thing when you keep eye contact and use a husky voice... know what I mean? I'm left bewildered here. One of her friends has told me that she often does that to her, as in talking to each other and the next minute she walks off saying she's really busy. The girl I'm interested has described the girl I got advice from as a good friend so I'm quite sure she's being honest with me.

Advice?

raemie21

Being 'really busy for the next couple of weeks' i definitely a blow-off, sorry.

Sh's sending mixed signals, doesn't sound like she knows what she wants herself.

I'd say leave her be and see how she reacts - you've done your piece, if she decides she wants more, then she can put in the effort.

BAM!

Sounds like she just wants to be friends and doesn't want to go any further OP, sorry. Maybe you just give her some space and wait and see if she comes a runnin'. Maybe she just hasn't made up her mind about you yet.

AnonoBoy

"Busy for the next few weeks" = not interested

She likes the attention but doesn't want to take it further.

LegacyUser

I've never been to busy to text someone I like.

I've often delayed texting someone I wasn't interested in or just not bothered replying.

She's not interested.

MIN2511

Don't text her again....

In work, talk to her flirt with her but if she doesn't make contact then walk away....

faceman

Sorry OP but i also agree, there is no mixed signals there at all. She's not interested. Best case she is enjoying the flirt but thats it.

As Min above said, stop pursuing her as you are only making it worse on yourself.

Ironically as soon as you stop showing interest, she will probably chase you!

On a funny note, i misread the first line of your post and thought you were a woman and had wild visions in my head as to where the post was going!

MIN2511

faceman wrote: »

Sorry OP but i also agree, there is no mixed signals there at all. She's not interested. Best case she is enjoying the flirt but thats it.

As Min above said, stop pursuing her as you are only making it worse on yourself.

Ironically as soon as you stop showing interest, she will probably chase you!

On a funny note, i misread the first line of your post and thought you were a woman and had wild visions in my head as to where the post was going!

Faceman.... exactly what i was thinking!!!!!

Gyalist

GoSlowJoe wrote: »

Hi,

I've got a woman issue that I thought someone might help me with. I work in the same company as this girl and we exchange a few looks, hello's and so on whenever we see each other. Recently we went for a couple of drinks after work as I was seeking her advice on something non-work related. It all went fine and I asked her if she would like to do it again some time. She said yes and we went our seperate ways.

So I sent her a txt a couple of days later and asked if she wanted to meet up some weekend and there was no reply. I asked her then next time I saw her in work and she said she had been too busy to reply. Fine I thought.

A few weeks went by and we exchange knowing glances and smiles, small talk and flirty comments etc... So she comes back from a holiday and when she see's me slows down for a chat and she has a really nice way of looking at me. Ok I think, still game ball. Send her a txt a week later to see if she'd like to go to the cinema some eve and a couple of days later I get a txt back to say she's really busy for the next couple of weeks and had no credit to reply. (She has a genuine reason for being busy that I am aware of but wheter or not thats a handy exscuse...!?)

For ages there's been flirting and knowing looks, big smiles and that 'Hey...' thing when you keep eye contact and use a husky voice... know what I mean? I'm left bewildered here. One of her friends has told me that she often does that to her, as in talking to each other and the next minute she walks off saying she's really busy. The girl I'm interested has described the girl I got advice from as a good friend so I'm quite sure she's being honest with me.

Advice?

*sighs*

Why would you flirt with her in person then text to arrange a meetup? That is cowardice and not in the least attractive. You seem to be afraid of her rejecting you in person but that is exactly what she is currently doing through her actions.

The situation is probably salvageable if you "man up" and show some leadership. None of this "would you like to go to the cinema some evening" crap, it's too non-specific. Choose the date and the film then ask her to go with you. Do it face-to-face, or as the last resort, by phone. Do not text. If she's not able to, and she is interested, she will offer you an alternative date.
If she's clearly not interested, then it's time to move on.

Sugar Drunk

don't screw the crew it can lead to disaster if it goes wrong

sounds like she likes the attention of having an admirer cos it makes her feel good but doesnt actually want to take it further.

busy for the next couple of weeks is definately a blow off