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You can take your eyes off someone if you try hard enough

  • 08-10-2008 9:17pm
    #1
    jamin'
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23 ✭


    I gave you lifts to wherever you
    wanted to go because I liked it
    when you wrapped your arms
    around me. I couldn't see your
    face but you were beautiful.
    For a 5 minute drive in a
    50 zone, I wished it was
    a 5 hour drive as we reached 70.
    Only because I could feel your
    heartbeat, eyes widen, heartbeat:
    beat against my back. It's your fault
    I closed my eyes... you took me somewhere else.
    You took me away, as the 96 Renault took us both.


Comments

  • #2
    Insect Overlord
    Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,972 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    Woah. Powerful. Good work jamin'.


  • #3
    jamin'
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23 ✭jamin'


    thank you :)


  • #4
    Matt Holck
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,706 ✭✭✭Matt Holck


    I am glad I read your poem

    this is the image that the poem evoked
    bare in mind the vision is a conglomeration of my experiences and feelings
    the car rose and fall like a needle stitching patches of landscape
    drawing a thread above and below the fabric of the universe

    in it's hollow, we were a two part harmony
    singing our own creation
    soothed by the rumble of the engine below


  • #5
    pickarooney
    Moderators, Arts Moderators Posts: 35,731 Mod ✭✭✭✭pickarooney


    Very nice, not much more to say. :)


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