stuck in middle between my mother and aunties

LegacyUser

Basicily im stuck in middle between my mother and aunties.My father died in july,my mother HATES my aunties.I (23)and my son live at home and visit my aunties either 1 r 2 days a week.they done nothing wrong to either me or my son.She think that we are talking about her,she hate the fact that I like to go and visit them,when i get home there always a row,what did u say ,why did you say that etc,then ques my son.Get ate if i come in from there after 9.I has orgainised i was goin to go to galway for h'ween week,she was shocked thought you go for 2-3 days,just found out a hour ago my aunt has booked myself n my son to new york the same week.I luv to go,when i tell my mother that they asked me she go AWOL.My mother has told me earlier today that she sick of my attituide etc where i done nothing wrong just that i visit my aunts and she would like if i left.I have nowhere to go or money.Dont say move out im working on that.just needed to rant.

Beruthiel

Wow. Your mother needs to grow up.
She may not like your aunts, but to act like that because of it is very childish.
You have a right to spend time with your family if you wish, she needs to live with that.
Do not get into a row with her over this again, next time she starts, walk away and tell her you are no longer entertaining her paranoia.

As you already know, moving out is your only option, things will get better when you do.

star-pants

Would agree with Beruthiel - your mother (without good cause) has no right to give you the 3rd degree every time you see your aunts. I assume your son is young, so she really shouldn't involve him in this situation of hers.

May I ask has your mother always disliked your aunts? has she been this way only since your father passed away or was she like this before? Just it seems she may have an issue we don't know about.

She can't stop you socialising or going away with your Aunts just because she dislikes them, as Beruthiel says, if she starts again, just calmly tell her that you don't see a point in her berage of questions that lead nowhere. OR you could try the route of sitting down with her and trying to find out what her issue with you seeing your aunts really is.

Ann22

That is a dead awkward situation. Likely you need your mother for helping out with babysitting and stuff so you can't just totally fall out with her. You need to tell her that she comes first, that you'd never talk about her to your aunties but you feel its in the best interests of your child to include them in his life. The more family he has to love him the better. It might be easier all round to visit your aunties on a day that your mother has something on so she's not sitting at home seething.

LegacyUser

May I ask has your mother always disliked your aunts? has she been this way only since your father passed away or was she like this before? Just it seems she may have an issue we don't know about.
OR you could try the route of sitting down with her and trying to find out what her issue with you seeing your aunts really is


Yes my son is 4.Yes my mother has always hated my aunts for all along as i can remember,my mother has a issue with the aunt.Even when my father was alive,she eat us for going up to them,he was there brother.You cant talk to my mother it always you dont know what there like,there using you.All they want is to keep in contact with me n my son,I see no harm in that
Ann22--yeah she did help me out with my son(it was really dad who minded him but she helped dad out when dad was sick),but since dad died she doesnt mind him anymore might collect him frommonessori if Im running few mins late from work that was 3 times,Ive told her that we dont talk bout her but she doesnt believe me,she thinks we are.doesnt matter what day i go up and see them,there always a issue when i get back

Thanks everyone for replsIm glad im not the mad one!!!