[Proposal] Official beard measurement units

KTRIC

I've extensively scoured (spend two minutes on google) the intarwebs and found that there is no official unit of measurement for beards :eek: !!!

So after much deliberation with our resident beard expert Dord, we came up with a new unit of measurement. Based on the Riker principal, 1 Riker is the lenght of Commander Rikers beard (see below). My own beard is half the lenght and is therefor 0.5 Rikers.

I'm going to try and get this made official but I need some backing from the international scientific (being the most bearded) and bearded community.





Edit:

Welcome Redditors .....

Sofaspud

What about varying beard lengths? In the middle of my chin I'm about 2 rikers, about 1 for the rest of the goatee area, and about half a riker along the jawline. Would there be a term for mixed-riker beards?

Jay P

And what about stubble?!

seanybiker

Im a no riker on top and whatever on bottom

Dord

I'd say that's at least 3 Rikers long! :eek:

brianthebard

3 rikers should also be convertible into one a half Neil Fallon.

seanybiker

3 rikers. Hmm not bad. Must find out who neil fallon is now lol

Dord

He's the singer in the band Clutch.

seanybiker

i just checked him on google. Cool beard

Sofaspud

Hmm, how many Neil Fallons to a ZZ Top?

brianthebard

seanybiker wrote: »

3 rikers. Hmm not bad. Must find out who neil fallon is now lol

Only the best bearded singer in the rockingest bearded band out there! they even have a song about beards;

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-s7P6s0YXGk

Why am I not playing my guitar right now??
Personally I would say 3 neil fallons to a zz?

seanybiker

3 maybe just a tad over 3.

Mahatma coat

so 3 rikers == a Fallon & 3 Fallon's == a ZZ Top

is this a linearscale or a exponential?

Sofaspud

Mahatma coat wrote: »

so 3 rikers == a Fallon & 3 Fallon's == a ZZ Top

is this a linearscale or a exponential?

Seems linear, don't think there's many beards higher than a ZZ Top, so a higher unit wouldn't be necessarry.

Star Lord

I move that a further measurement be introduced though, a Preposterous...

Anything longer than one ZZ Top = 1 Preposterous. There are no multiples of it

Sarky

Jay P wrote: »

And what about stubble?!

What about stubble?

Edwardius

Hmmm, 4 or 5 here methinks.

KTRIC

Sarky wrote: »

What about stubble?

Exactly, stubble isn't a beard. Its just men being lazy :rolleyes:

seanybiker

designer stubble is the worse. Russel bland for example. Ah tis annoying.