Sex issues...resolved?

LegacyUser

I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 2 years and for the past year my sex drive was just gone. Absolutely kaput. I'm 21, but I was suffering from depression for a while but I overcame that and sex drive didn't reappear. I lost all my confidence in sex; asking for what I wanted, initiating it, even feeling turned on at all. I had nothing. I knew I loved my boyfriend though and that I still found him attractive so I knew we'd work it out. We tried talking, taking things slow, doing all the things people normally suggest on here but nothing was helping and I figured there was something wrong with me. When I say my sex drive was gone I mean really really gone, I rarely masturbated or anything during the last year.

Anyway, things have changed lately. In fact everything is polar opposites. I'm finally 100% out of depression, I'm loving college for the first time, I have loads of new friends, I'm taking pride in my appearance, I have a job I love and I'm happy. Like I said, it's all opposite from how I felt a year ago. Yesterday, for the first time in months definitely, I felt horny and I masturbated, and again today. It was a huge stepping stone and for the first time in months also I can't wait to see my boyfriend and jump his bones. I can't remember the last time I wanted to have sex.

So why am I posting here? Well this might not seem like an issue to anyone else but it is to me. After I masturbate and orgasm I don't feel anything special. I don't feel happy and think how great it was to do that, I just think 'Ok, that's that done, what now?'. I almost feel like my mind just wants to forget what I just did, like I did something wrong. I don't know if this is normal or am I weird or what? I just kinda wanted to know how other people feel after they masturbate?

aidan24326

sexrevisited wrote: »

I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 2 years and for the past year my sex drive was just gone. Absolutely kaput. I'm 21, but I was suffering from depression for a while but I overcame that and sex drive didn't reappear. I lost all my confidence in sex; asking for what I wanted, initiating it, even feeling turned on at all. I had nothing. I knew I loved my boyfriend though and that I still found him attractive so I knew we'd work it out. We tried talking, taking things slow, doing all the things people normally suggest on here but nothing was helping and I figured there was something wrong with me. When I say my sex drive was gone I mean really really gone, I rarely masturbated or anything during the last year.

Anyway, things have changed lately. In fact everything is polar opposites. I'm finally 100% out of depression, I'm loving college for the first time, I have loads of new friends, I'm taking pride in my appearance, I have a job I love and I'm happy. Like I said, it's all opposite from how I felt a year ago. Yesterday, for the first time in months definitely, I felt horny and I masturbated, and again today. It was a huge stepping stone and for the first time in months also I can't wait to see my boyfriend and jump his bones. I can't remember the last time I wanted to have sex.

So why am I posting here? Well this might not seem like an issue to anyone else but it is to me. After I masturbate and orgasm I don't feel anything special. I don't feel happy and think how great it was to do that, I just think 'Ok, that's that done, what now?'. I almost feel like my mind just wants to forget what I just did, like I did something wrong. I don't know if this is normal or am I weird or what? I just kinda wanted to know how other people feel after they masturbate?

I think to feel that way after masturbation is quite normal. Sex with someone you care about is a much more satisfying thing physically and mentally and it's natural to feel really good afterwards. Masturbation is a physical relief and feels nice when you do it, but I don't think it's necessary that you feel anything other than that physical relief afterwards. I certainly wouldn't. It would probably be forgotten 5 minutes later. But you certainly shouldn't feel as though you've just done something wrong, that part of it isn't 'normal'.

von Neumann

Good to hear, your back to winning ways.

I think aidan24326 sums it up very well.

Overheal

congratulations getting back on the wagon! May the road rise up to meet you, and be very very bumpy.

LegacyUser

You old situation sounds exactly like my ex-girlfriend and I. Do you have any idea what turned it around for you?

Dragan

sexrevisited wrote: »

So why am I posting here? Well this might not seem like an issue to anyone else but it is to me. After I masturbate and orgasm I don't feel anything special. I don't feel happy and think how great it was to do that, I just think 'Ok, that's that done, what now?'. I almost feel like my mind just wants to forget what I just did, like I did something wrong. I don't know if this is normal or am I weird or what? I just kinda wanted to know how other people feel after they masturbate?

Well it really begs the question of what did you used to feel after you masturbated? At the end of the day, masturbation and sex are two clearly different beasts and should stimulate completely different emotions and desires in you afterwards.

I wouldn't get down on yourself, you appear to be back on the up and up! Take things slow, let your natural urges sort themselves out and go from there.

G&T

Having the buttons pushed for you is so much nicer than
pushing them yourself:D

Relax your back in the saddle and happy which are the
main things.