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Heads wrecked over what to do

  • 23-09-2008 11:07pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Recently, me and my boyfriend of 4 years have been going through a bit of a rough patch and it all came to a massive fight a few weeks ago and ever since my head as been all over the place as in what to do. We both said a lot of stuff that was very hurtful to each other, ( im gonna say now we both had drink on us) so it all kicked off a chain of events and while we sorted everything out now, Im still unsure of what I want.
    I love him to bits I really do but with everything that has been going on,I just dont know what I want anymore- whether I can deal with this constant s*** going around in my head. I think about it everyday and get really down about it.
    We dont live together which has kinda worked to our advantage, so we have the opportunity to have times to ourselves but from the way hes been behaving since it all went down hill is making me believe he doesnt want to be apart from me but I really just need to get my head together and to add to it all I more stuff going on with my family/career to think about.

    Iwanna suggest a break but I dont at the same time if you get me. Its a horrible situation that im in and don't know what to do. I know he really loves me and I love him but just don't know what to do anymore.

    Anybody help me please!? :(


Comments

  • #2
    krpc
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 619 ✭✭✭krpc


    Can you elaborate on the problems ('sh1t') you mentioned in your post? What exactly has led you to this point?


  • #3
    Klingon Hamlet
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,747 ✭✭✭Klingon Hamlet


    helphelp24 wrote: »
    We both said a lot of stuff that was very hurtful to each other:(

    It sounds to me that whatever was said between you has really shaken up your feelings. It's horrible when you think everything is going smoothly and then over drinks, things heat up and the person seems different or cruel even...

    Maybe it wasn't what was said, but the fact that there were things that weren't out in the open. I alwas hope the person I'm with is fully honest with me but that never happens, most of us bottle it all up til it bursts out, just the way you described.

    Is there anything in particular that he said that got to you? Maybe you need to sit down and go through those things with him, just say that they've been nagging at you ever since...he may feel the same way. Clarifying it, clearing the air, can really help.

    All IMHO of course. Either way best of luck!


  • #4
    anonymous_joe
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,255 ✭✭✭anonymous_joe


    About suggesting a break...

    People tend to take that suggestion badly. Because it suggests you don't care for them anymore.

    The best advice I can offer not really knowing the details is honesty. Tell him there's something wrong. Don't hide it, because if he cares for you, he'll notice. And as I can attest hiding something like that from someone who loves you is impossible, and what if they take it the wrong way?

    Just be clear and honest.

    And good luck.


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