Adopting from India

lostinnappies

Hey there,

Just wondered if anyone here has had experience adopting from India. My hubby and I have two boys and its dangerous for me to have any more. I would love to (in a few years) adopt a little girl from India (or somewhere else).

I have loads of questions, how long did the process take? How much did your flights and accommodation cost?(expesive flying to India). Was it difficult? What are the chances of adopting a new born - 4 months? I have no problem adopting older children, its mainly selfish reasons im afraid that i want to adopt a baby (I dont want to miss any part of her life:)). Is there an agency here in Ireland which deals with adopting Indian children?

Thanks again for any info.

dsg

Best place is www.rollercoaster.ie to get info. Start a thread in adoption forum on there and within minutes everyone will answer.

lostinnappies

cool thanks

carriebyrne

Dont know if you can adopt from India unless you are Indian yourself or a Hindu or Buddhist. Call the Adoption Authority and they will tell you where you can adopt from. your best chance of getting a baby girl is Vietnam or Ethiopia- they have the youngest baby girls available. You know due to the disgraceful system in Ireland you will be WAITING 4 YEARS TO ADOPT
It takes one year in total in Denmark, 14 months in Netherlands, under 2 years in UK. We are seriously considering moving to N Ireland so we can adopt faster after 4 years of trying for a baby they want us to wait another 4 years. disgraceful
Best of luck!

lostinnappies

I dont know if this is true but as far as i am aware you can adopt from india but you go through an adoption agency in india not through the irish one. I dont know what else it entails but i think there maybe something on this side you have to do. Thats what im trying to find out. But thanks for the info on the other countries.

carriebyrne

hi lost in nappies
well i hope you can adopt from india if that is what you want. the thing is no matter where you adopt from you have to get your eligibility certificate from Ireland. there are countless urban myths about couples going away and managing to adopt from abroad, directly with that country, but you have to put your name down in ireland with the HSE. THen you wait 2 years before you hear from them (SCANDALOUS!) and then you go to an information meeting, followed by 6 days training (1 day per week over 12 weeks) in issues around adoption and how to parent a child with identity and attachment issues etc. We found this stage very depressing- it felt like the social workers facilitating the session were painting a bleak picture, forced to watch videos of orphanages etc. - you have been warned! but we found meeting parents who had adopted and getting their version very encouraging and my husband has come around to the idea again.
Third step- Waiting for your assigned social worker to get in touch and come into your home and assess your suitability and then separate you both and check that you are psychologically fit to adopt!! you can be waiting 3 months if you are lucky but more likely up to 8 months for this stage to follow, you have to have 6-8 sessions with the social worker, then they prepare a recommendation report on you both and it is submitted and vetted by some pen pusher who takes their time to stamp it and then you finally get your certificate. After that you have to wait for a referral from your chosen country. it is good that you already have your heart set on india as you have to specify early on which country you have to adopt from. You may wait up to one year for a referral and then you get short notice - you gotta get on a plane within 2 weeks to get to meet your new child and then you may have to hang around for a while whilst you go through the bureaucracy and handover ceremonies etc in that country and then finally you bring your new baby home! 4 years later! YOu arent allowed to work for one year after that time so that you can bond properly with your child and give her the attention she so badly needs after the neglect. But Im sure you will handle it and you have plenty of time to think through all the issues. Im so glad we met lovely parents who adore their adopted children, if i had just listened to the adoption agency i would have been totally put off so dont let them do that to you! best of luck !!

lostinnappies

Thanks for that, its very informative. I never knew Ireland was so rubbish. I mean here you have countless numbers of children needing a loving home and it takes the Irish government that long to get up of their arses. I know they need to make sure that a child is going to a safe and prepared home but come on now.

Thanks again for all the advise.

coco200066

Do you have a link to where you put your name down for the two year waiting list for the eligibility cert that you talked about? What is the HSE?

neilled

Whilst the overseas process is rather slow down here (and I would view this as a resourcing issue and as a result of the fallout of a case a few years ago) I have come across a rather arrogant attitude (not on this forum) amongst some "would be" adoptive parents that they have some kind of "right" to a child and those pesky natives and bureaucratic penpushers won't hand over whats "rightfully" theirs. A piece of property if you will. I say this sitting at tables and listening to conversations with a dropped jaw and being horrified on behalf of the poor unfortunate that ends up with mum and dadzilla. The thought that I may have ended up with an auld pair like that is frankly terrifying.

I have no issues regarding my own adoption but there's times I've come across those in the process and wondered about their suitability.......... Whilst the process is too long, reasonable checks should be made.......

coco200066

I hear what your say....and rightly so.

However I just need to find out what lists are out there so I could put my name down on and see what happens. Nothing in life is guaranteed of course.

Mia belle

coco, if you go to www.adoptionboard.ie you will find a list of health boards in your area. They will give you any info you need to get started. You will wait about 2 years to get called for the prep course, very short on social workers and a huge list of people waiting to get assessed. It may take about 5 years in total to complete the process.