How do I "pull"?

LegacyUser

I was out last night and before the night began I had this goal of bringing some random girl home with me.

I've never had a one night stand and I've not had sex in a very long time so I'm really just trying to fulfill my basics needs.

Last person I have been with was my GF from a year back, we kind of just feel into place and things happened. I didn't have to try chat her up to win her over or anything like that, she liked me as much as I liked her so, as I said, things just feel into place.

So anyway back to last night, I had no idea how to approach any females or even what to say to them, so needless to say I came home alone.

I'd just love to know how it's done. Dunno if this should be in Personal Issues but dunno where else to put it.

I mean it's so easy for a girl if she wants to bring some randomer home for a one night stand. A female could walk into a night club or where ever and have her pick from 100+ willing men. For a man it's not so easy.

Overheal

If you really want to have a one night stand, then google The Game (book)

But its not something I myself would do, tbh. And plenty of other posters would feel the same way if I may be so bold as to speak for them.

tolosenc

uselessman wrote: »

I was out last night and before the night began I had this goal of bringing some random girl home with me.

I've never had a one night stand and I've not had sex in a very long time so I'm really just trying to fulfill my basics needs.

Last person I have been with was my GF from a year back, we kind of just feel into place and things happened. I didn't have to try chat her up to win her over or anything like that, she liked me as much as I liked her so, as I said, things just feel into place.

So anyway back to last night, I had no idea how to approach any females or even what to say to them, so needless to say I came home alone.

I'd just love to know how it's done. Dunno if this should be in Personal Issues but dunno where else to put it.

I mean it's so easy for a girl if she wants to bring some randomer home for a one night stand. A female could walk into a night club or where ever and have her pick from 100+ willing men. For a man it's not so easy.

If it was an exact formula:
1. It removes the thrill of the hunt.
2. It would be bottled and sold by this stage.

Silenceisbliss

Be out-going, lose your inhibitions, (have one or two drinks for this if it helps),and be nice and friendly to the poor girl.

It's a fine balance of outgoingness and niceness that you have to achieve.

and if at first you dont succeed, move on.

The Bollox

I know where you're coming from, OP. I find it almost impossible to get chatting to random girls on a night out. the bet place for me is the beer garden. The thing is if I am introduced to someone (lets say by a friend) then I could probably talk for Ireland, and keep the conversation interesting, however I am USELESS at starting anything. I have no idea how to initiate chatter, so my most common one would be "have you got a lighter / match / smoke" even if I had one of those on my person at the time.

any time I have tried the "hi, I'm x, how are you?" it comes off as too rigid and the girls never give me the time of day (f*ckin' skirts!) so I know your pain

krpc

I am useless at chatting someone up. I mean, I am a complete mess if I attempt it - mumbling at them, talking about the wrong and sometimes inappropriate things and so on. I think it's more to do at having an inability for small talk rather than just an inability of chatting someone up.

It's odd because I'm quite a confident person but chatting someone up is something I can't do so I avoid it at all costs. If I like someone I generally bite the bullet and skip the small talk. I'd simply approach them and ask them, "What would you do if I kissed you?". The replies are either "Uhm, erm, I don't know." In that case I would do it anyway and there is no resistance. If I'm in Dublin the answer is usually "Yes" :pac: So that's my way of breaking the ice - not ideal for everyone, but if I didn't have some sort of 'technique' I'd be screwed.

Beta Ray Bill

I used to be exactly like this

But Girls aren that scarey! (although they seem that way) Just go up and talk to them. Complement them 9Girls love that) but not a sleezy complement "You're a Ride!" a subtal complement will do. Something about what they are wearing... they LOVE that! "Your Shoes are Awesome!"

They are only people talk to them about anything
the worst that can happen is that they can just walk away. then just try again

karen3212

how about,

''Hello, this is a great club/pub/place isn't it?'' and after reply ''Where are you from''

has the country changed so much that people won't talk to each other out these days. It's just talking, chatting.

Obviously not every girl/man wants one night stands, some may be at the stage where they'd like relationships or some already in one etc, so no matter what you, you won't get that one to go home with ya.

always carry protection :pac:

Wagon

Walk up to someone, start cracking really tasteless jokes and talking bollocks and just imagine it was a mate standing in front of you. Don't bother trying to get close cos she'll just push you away (because women folk are weird like that). When there's no connection and your both bored, move on and chat to other ransomers. And keep knocking back the booze

Seriously though, whenever I've gone out with the aim of scoring i ALWAYS fail. it's guaranteed. So just go out with the intention of having the craic. you don't need to pull someone for a shag on the night. Your only going to pull a load of bitches who'll use you for the shag and tell you to **** off in the morning. not fun.

Phlann

Just put yourself out there, buddy. You'll become more comfortable with it the more you do it.

If all you're after is a bit of fun then treat it as a game and don't be afraid of rejection or awkward silences.

LegacyUser

obl wrote: »

If it was an exact formula:
1. It removes the thrill of the hunt.
2. It would be bottled and sold by this stage.

There is an exact formula(well almost) , the game by neil strauss that someone recommended in this thread, and your right
It DOES remove the thrill of the hunt,
and It IS bottled and sold all over the world.

Pen1987

DONT read 'The Game' or any of those books! (Although I have read The Game but simply out of curiousity because everyone was talking about it - its a savage read. I probably should of said DONT, PLEASE (its cringeworthy) do what the lads in The Game do).

That is all.

I've posted about a million replies to about a million of these threads, I shall say no more.

Actually, I will say one thing more.

Confidence, copious amounts, but no arrogance - its a thin line.
Dont be a bastard, DONT be a walkover, DONT be too nice, DONT buy her a drink and DONT touch her in the small of her back unless youve been speaking for longer than 15 minutes.

DO keep your body language open, DO touch her on the back of her arm, DO speak to her friends and win them over and DO put it down to good practice if shes not interested and move on.

Actually, that was a bit more... way aswell continue answering in this thread.

Sprouts

Just don't go out with the intention of bringing someone back for the night, go out with some friends have a laugh and don't sit away in a corner somewhere because you won't get a chance to talk to any girls. If you're in a busy place up near the bar its much easier to start a casual chat with someone. If you get chatting with someone and its going ok, just ask for their number and maybe call them or text them during the week. Simple enough.

davyjose

Read Neil Strauss' Rules of The Game

Here's some pointers from it:

- Make yourself seem unavailable

- Be a peacock - wear something flashy

- Send out a ‘neg’ - a negative remark will pique her interest

- Make time your ally - have somewhere else to be

Galvasean

The attitudes towards toward women being displayed here shock me.
Does anyone still approach women for conversation these days without the ultimate goal being putting the hee-hee in her hoo-hoo?

krpc

Galvasean wrote: »

The attitudes towards toward women being displayed here shock me.
Does anyone still approach women for conversation these days without the ultimate goal being putting the hee-hee in her hoo-hoo?

I'm not being an a$$ here but the thread subject is "How do I 'pull'? There would clearly be 'techniques' that would be offered up on how to get a girl.

I think to assume that it would be all lovey dovey is simply naïve. We live in an era of "Sex and the City". Girls are equally as bad (reads: up for it) as guys.

Sprouts

Without that desire for the ''ultimate goal'' as you put it, nobody would be here, its natural.

Galvasean

Sprouts wrote: »

Without that desire for the ''ultimate goal'' as you put it, nobody would be here, its natural.

I don't think people trying to have one night stands are actively trying to reproduce.

Jigsaw

Rohypnol tbh.

davyjose

Galvasean wrote: »

Does anyone still approach women for conversation these days without the ultimate goal being putting the hee-hee in her hoo-hoo?

No, a lot of us have friends for that

Four-Too

Galvasean wrote: »

The attitudes towards toward women being displayed here shock me.
Does anyone still approach women for conversation these days without the ultimate goal being putting the hee-hee in her hoo-hoo?

Nice that some girls still think this way actually! Fair play.
But the truth is "no" they don't. The vast majority think about sex nearly all the time, they are always mad after it, it is something shameful, but many people are shameless.

Wibbs

Jigsaw ease up on the "jokey" drug references. This is drifting off a tad so I'm closing it. If the OP wants it reopened, PM me. Otherwise google is your friend. Doing a search for picking up women will have you inundated.