Opinions on this?

LegacyUser

Guy's need some opinions on this,

Got chatting to a girl about two weeks ago on a night out with mates, scored her exchanged numbers etc, I've been out of a 3 year relationship for about 6 months so haven't really bothered going any further than kissing etc just been happy to be out and about, anyway we've been texting a good bit and flirting, she knows i'm not after a relationship and seems fine with that. Now she wants to come over tomorrow evening for a few drinks and I know from the way she's talking she wants sex, two problems here...

1. I think she's in to some pretty strange stuff mention of biting, rough etc don't really know what to expect I don't want her beating or whipping the crap outta me not into that.

2. I think out of charactor i'm actually a bit nervous I haven't been with anyone other than my ex in 3 years so I don't really know what to expect. She's alsom fairly expierinced say she's been with more than a few guy's.

Now she's fairly hot and it has been 6 month's any positive advise other than "Hit that",

Cheers.

Burial

DickBurns wrote: »

Guy's need some opinions on this,

Got chatting to a girl about two weeks ago on a night out with mates, scored her exchanged numbers etc, I've been out of a 3 year relationship for about 6 months so haven't really bothered going any further than kissing etc just been happy to be out and about, anyway we've been texting a good bit and flirting, she knows i'm not after a relationship and seems fine with that. Now she wants to come over tomorrow evening for a few drinks and I know from the way she's talking she wants sex, two problems here...

1. I think she's in to some pretty strange stuff mention of biting, rough etc don't really know what to expect I don't want her beating or whipping the crap outta me not into that.

2. I think out of charactor i'm actually a bit nervous I haven't been with anyone other than my ex in 3 years so I don't really know what to expect. She's alsom fairly expierinced say she's been with more than a few guy's.

Now she's fairly hot and it has been 6 month's any positive advise other than "Hit that",

Cheers.

Well, it's all upto you really isn't it? Are you ready for it? If not decline the drinks idea, if you are ready go with the flow! If she does something you don't like tell her/stop her... Also, whats this character business? and Your expierenced too you know... You have been getting "practise" with your GF for 3 years... It's understadable to be nervous but you managed to have a GF for 3 years and she obviously likes you, for you. So I'd say go for it!

Miss Fluff

You don't HAVE to do anything you don't want to.

Why don't you have a few drinks and see where the evening takes you? I mean if after a G and T she produces a gimp mask and nipple clamps while wanting to poo on your glass coffee table while she rodgers you with a two-footer and you're not comfortable with that then all you have to do is say "Not tonight Josephine". Quite simple really.

Or if you do find there is chemistry there and the mood takes you, then go as far as makes you feel comfortable.:)

unhappycamper

DickBurns wrote: »

Guy's need some opinions on this,

Got chatting to a girl about two weeks ago on a night out with mates, scored her exchanged numbers etc, I've been out of a 3 year relationship for about 6 months so haven't really bothered going any further than kissing etc just been happy to be out and about, anyway we've been texting a good bit and flirting, she knows i'm not after a relationship and seems fine with that. Now she wants to come over tomorrow evening for a few drinks and I know from the way she's talking she wants sex, two problems here...

1. I think she's in to some pretty strange stuff mention of biting, rough etc don't really know what to expect I don't want her beating or whipping the crap outta me not into that.

2. I think out of charactor i'm actually a bit nervous I haven't been with anyone other than my ex in 3 years so I don't really know what to expect. She's alsom fairly expierinced say she's been with more than a few guy's.

Now she's fairly hot and it has been 6 month's any positive advise other than "Hit that",

Cheers.

It can be really unattractive when a girl you don't really know that well is sex mad, I met one girl like that in my life and it was a little crazy, I ran like the clappers after a bit.

AngryBadger

Depends on what you want yourself OP> The easiest way to find out what she's into without getting eaten alive is to ask her. Seems to me that you wouldn't mind a bit of mattress magic, but you're apprehensive because
A) You're not long out of a relationship
You don't know what she's into.

The lady in question can't help you with A, you'll have to decide for yourself how you feel about that, my advice would be go for it, you're not seeing anyone, you're both adults, why not enjoy yourselves.

As for B, well you can either ask her and then decide if you're up for it, or you can just wait and see what happens (bad idea if you're this stressed about it).

I'd ask, then decide.

LegacyUser

Well, I have asked but I told I'd have to wait and find out, didn't want to push the matter don't want to come accros terrified you know , I guess I'm just a little apprehensive moving on can be a scary matter and i'm not as sex driven as most guy's, not to say it wouldn't be nice. Maybe i'll just go and see what happens, worst comes to worst I might be on here having a laugh about it...

AngryBadger

DickBurns wrote: »

worst comes to worst I might be on here having a laugh about it...

Good attitude! May as well give it a shot, if you've asked her and she's saying "wait and find out" then I doubt there'll be anything TOO kinky/S&M-ish. Obviously if you're asking then it means you're a little apprehensive, so she should get the message to maybe tone down the more hardcore stuff or risk you running out the door.

Have a blast man!

GrumPy

Hit it.

MicraBoy

I'd just say relax and go with the flow. Try not to work yourself up into a lather about it. What happens, happens, and if you don't want to do anything just say so.

Most of all, ENJOY yourself!

Pen1987

Send her my way.


No seriously... is there really a question here? I dont see why youre worried. If she starts whipping you or something tell her to stop and take her down a diffirent avenue (no pun intended... ok pun intended but really.)... Shes not going to break you in half!

LegacyUser

Ha ha, well no i'm not scared of a 5 something girl breaking me in half, I guess my problem was more with point 2 then the first one , It just might be a little embarrasing i don't wanna humiliate the girl either...

marzic

Its a dilema of sorts. If i were a few yrs younger than i am, which is not old, i would say 'dont just stand there man, do something!' And for the most part i would say it now too but there is always the risk that shes a ding dong psycho who will boil your bunny, so to speak! sometimes you just have to move outside your comfort zone though, and if its a disaster, put it down to experience. Ah f**k it dude, i think you have to, you both know where you stand, and if it freaks you out, just be honest and tell her that sh1t isnt for you!

SnowMonkey

yeah go for it....

shes said she likes it rough.... all i can say is maybe give it a go. you might like it granted first girl uve been with since your brake up but cleerly go for it... Beleave me i found my self in the same situation when my x asked me to start lightly chokeing her when where having sex she gets turned on buy it ...i felt it was slightly inaporpriate but she said look its ok, it's what i like.

I persoanlly like women like her its not over rough sex like beating each other up its just rough and shoire man the experence will have you going wtf .....

and ule learn new things... shore why not go with it...

Caoimhín

Jaysus, go for it man.

Have a few beers first to loosen up.

And if not then PM me her number.

AARRRGH

Fantasy and reality are two different things. It's likely what she says in her texts have little to do what she's like in bed.

Enjoy the night!

papazen

you've had 3 years solid sex in a relationship so you can probably equal her experience. the only reason i would say not to go for it is if you can't get it up - it's hard having sex with somebody else after getting out of a long term relationship and you can suffer a mental block. so if you drink, don't drink too much - whiskydick city.

LegacyUser

papazen wrote: »

you've had 3 years solid sex in a relationship so you can probably equal her experience. the only reason i would say not to go for it is if you can't get it up - it's hard having sex with somebody else after getting out of a long term relationship and you can suffer a mental block. so if you drink, don't drink too much - whiskydick city.

Yep, really wish I had of read this before hand, exactly as above happend, total mental block and too much whiskey, probably the most embarrasing moment of my life wanted to bury my head in the sand this morning.

SnowMonkey

DickBurns wrote: »

Yep, really wish I had of read this before hand, exactly as above happend, total mental block and too much whiskey, probably the most embarrasing moment of my life wanted to bury my head in the sand this morning.

lOTS of people get it man dont be embarssied first time youve been with a new women in
3 years cut your self osme slack.....

are you meeting her again ?

Miss Fluff

DickBurns wrote: »

Yep, really wish I had of read this before hand, exactly as above happend, total mental block and too much whiskey, probably the most embarrasing moment of my life wanted to bury my head in the sand this morning.

Well tbh OP you had wound yourself up into a state beforehand and your posts suggested anxiety from the onset, I am not surprised by this outcome. Seriously do not worry, this happens to every man at some stage so chalk it down to too much booze, don't worry about it and just go forth and prosper my good man, these things happen and it's not a big deal.

ChocolateSauce

Well as someone who's into BDSM, I can assure you that biting and scratching do not mean she's into whipping and bondage (yet). It does mean she likes it rough.

As for you, I came crashing out of a 2 year relationship once, and it put me off women for over a year. I had to ease back into it. Maybe throwing yourself into a sexual relationship with a "like it rough" girl isn't wise? Especially if she's the dominant type.

---

That happened to me too. During my 1 year stint off woman I went back to a woman's house, and I couldn't get it up. It was embarrassing. I just didn't have the drive or the motivation or the confidence to perform after my harrowing break-up some months earlier. Like I said, take it slow.

bennyblanco

Don't worry about it man,it happens to the best of us.Chalk it down and keep on keeping on:)
Sounds like you're overthinking the whole thing(I'm an overthinker myself so I know the way),try to relax a bit
TheRE's always next time

RoosterIllusion

Happens to every normal guy at least once. Who cares as long as you can get it up again at some point.