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The Etiquette of Afters!

  • 27-08-2008 4:15pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 574 ✭✭✭


    Hi All.

    Just throwing this out there to see what opinions people have.

    The Afters.

    Myself and my Special Lady Friend are hoping to get married early next year, a small affair. We have decided to go with 30 people from each side of our families. With an "afters" crowd of an additional 50 people.
    So far, so good.

    We are now thinking about the afters crowd, and how we go about this. People that don't mutually mean something TO US BOTH, (unless very special exceptions) should fall into the afters crowd.
    In other words my friends from college, mean something to me, but not my lady, they're afters material. Also she has friends from work that I don't know well....AFTERS!!!!



    My question:
    Is this a common practice for a small wedding.
    And if people here have planned small weddings how did they deal with this.

    Because personally myself, if I'm not invited to someone's wedding but I am invited to the afters then I DO NOT attend the afters. Its just a personal rule of thumb, (although again there are exceptions to this rule).
    I'm not being a big baby, I just wouldn't go to a hotel somewhere to sit around a large round table for a few hours with people that have been drinking all day, yaaaaaaaaawn. :(

    Anyone wanna give their opinions on the matter.
    Try and base your opinion on the fact that we are probably all organising weddings (hence why we are on this thread) and also we have all been invited to weddings or afters at some stage in our lives.

    All responses appreciated.


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,917 ✭✭✭✭iguana


    oldscoil wrote: »
    I'm not being a big baby, I just wouldn't go to a hotel somewhere to sit around a large round table for a few hours with people that have been drinking all day, yaaaaaaaaawn. :(

    But people invited to the afters usually fall into the same category, ie workmates and college friends like you mentioned. So if I was going to the afters of a workmate I'd expect a number of other workmates to be arriving at the same time as me, because that's always how it's been in the past. So your point about sitting around with "drunk" people doesn't hold water. People don't get that drunk anyway as they have been eating a meal.

    On the other hand, if the wedding is somewhere central I'm happy to go to the afters, but I'm not going to head off to somewhere halfway down the country.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,365 ✭✭✭hunnymonster


    Good luck with the wedding planning. It seems a bit strange to me that for YOUR wedding you're happy to have an afters event but you wouldn't dream of going to someone else's?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,816 ✭✭✭unclebill98


    Good luck with the wedding planning. It seems a bit strange to me that for YOUR wedding you're happy to have an afters event but you wouldn't dream of going to someone else's?

    Thanks what I was thinking.

    Simple stick to the 30 people rule and go through everyone you can think of. Fill up the 30 people and everyone else goes in afterwards. If you invite 50 people to the afters then lets hope there not thinking like you did or only 10 will turn up. :p


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