Ask the Oracle

yayamark

Something i saw on another forum

Its a bit of crack

Ask the Oracle

Here

You asked:
Are Tyrone a cynical football team?

---

The Oracle replied:
If you ask me - as many people do - I say yes
:eek:

You asked:
Are Kerry going to win the All Ireland Senior Football Final this year?

---

The Oracle replied:
Without a shed of doubt.
Whoo Hooo

Tristram

I for one welcome our new oracle overlord!

cruiserweight

Were you on the soccer forum earlier

You asked:
Are wexford going to win the all-ireland in 2008

The Oracle replied:
I just contacted the gods and they said yes.

Yavvy

You asked:

Are dublin bottelers ?
The Oracle replied:

Very likely.


MotherFluper ..

but on the bright side

You asked:

When will Dublin win the all Ireland
The Oracle replied:

In a couple of hours.

GAAman

You asked:

I think you are talking Bolox?
The Oracle replied:

That would be my dream, but unfortunately I’m not.


You asked:

Would you like to lick my boom stick?
The Oracle replied:

Yes, definitely.

UnitedIrishman

Bodes well for our minors against Kerry this weekend..

When will Mayo win an Ireland?
Three days from now.

When will Mayo win a senior All Ireland?
In the summer of 2011.

Should Ciaran McDonald be playing for Mayo?
With all the uncertainties involved, I'd say no.

jebuz

You asked:
Were you serious when you said Wexford would win the All Ireland?

The Oracle replied:
Ah, those were the days! It was in 1996.

You asked:
Wow impressive, but I was talking about the football

The Oracle replied:
I don’t see what you mean.

You asked:
Were you serious when you said Wexford would win the All Ireland senior football championship?

The Oracle replied:
It was just a couple years ago but I don’t remember the exact date.

You asked:
You’re a phony

The Oracle replied:
Yes I am.

I think this particular case can now be closed, although fair play regarding the 1996 comment...one can still dream of another all-Ireland though

DDC1990

Ha i asked the generic question taht was in the box...

You asked:

Who am I?
The Oracle replied:

Your name is Horst and you live in Berlin.

Guten Tag!:D

On the Plus side i also asked:

Will Kerry Win the All-Ireland?
The Oracle replied:

I’m positive about this.

Nalced_irl

Alany wrote: »

You asked:

When will Dublin win the all Ireland
The Oracle replied:

In a couple of hours.

Ha! Priceless!

Nalced_irl

I was bored!!

You asked:

Who is dirtier, Graham Geraghty or Ciaran Whelan?
The Oracle replied:

The first, absolutely. I cannot tell you more, my code of ethics as an Oracle forbids it.



You asked:

Did Collie Moran mean to hit Bannon that hard?
The Oracle replied:

In theory, yes. In practise, no. I’ll hold a presentation on this matter in the Annual Oracles’ Conference.


You asked:

I dont believe you
The Oracle replied:

I don’t see what you mean.


You asked:

Cudos on the GG or CW question but your lying about Collie
The Oracle replied:

Try the latter, it will work out better. Your mother just came on-line. She wants to know where you are and what you’re doing.


You asked:

Lets leave the mothers out of this
The Oracle replied:

Let’s not.


You asked:

You want me to start about yours?
The Oracle replied:

I can’t understand a word you’re saying.


You asked:

Thats cos your a fool
The Oracle replied:

Yeah.


You asked:

Glad you agree, bye now.
The Oracle replied:

Hope to see you soon.


You asked:

Hope i dont

flahavaj

You asked:

Will Waterford win the 2008 All ireland Hurling?
The Oracle replied:

After the most thorough investigation I can answer with confidence: maybe.


:mad:

yayamark

Haha these are great!

Psychedelic

You asked:
Who will win the All Ireland Hurling Final?

The Oracle replied:
Rod Stewart. You can tell others you heard it from me. They’ll believe you better if you do so.

dreamer_ire

You asked:
Will kilkenny win the all ireland hurling final this year
The Oracle replied:
There’s a 50:50 chance.

that's some oracle!!!

Flukey

You asked:

Should Paul Galvin avoid notebooks?

The Oracle replied:

If you ask me - as many people do - I say yes.

---

You asked:

Who won the All-Ireland Senior Football Final in 1995?

The Oracle replied:

George W. Bush

---

You asked:

How many All-Irelands have Kerry won?

The Oracle replied:

I’d say around 4.

---

You asked:

Do you know anything about the GAA?

The Oracle replied:

Of course. I’d be incompetent in my work if there was something I didn’t know.

---

You asked:

What time will the replay be on Saturday?

The Oracle replied:

Precisely at 0.19.
(Better get there early lads)

---

You asked:

Is Aidan O’Mahony a good diver?

The Oracle replied:

I had to flip a coin, but I answer with the same confidence as ever: absolutely.

---

You asked:

Kerry or Cork?



The Oracle replied:

Neither. Both are bad.

dreamer_ire

Flukey wrote: »

---

You asked:

Kerry or Cork?



The Oracle replied:

Neither. Both are bad.

Yet again fairly accurate given last week's performance!

DeepBlue

You asked:

Which are better - Meath or Dublin?
The Oracle replied:

The first, absolutely.
(Hey, don't blame the messenger)

You asked:

Should Kerry have won last Sunday?
The Oracle replied:

Most likely, although nothing in life is certain.
(Never a truer word spoken)

You asked:

Will Cork win this Sunday?
The Oracle replied:

I wouldn’t bet on it.
(I probably wouldn't bet against it either)

You asked:

Surely Tyrone will win the championship?
The Oracle replied:

Hmm yes.
(Yikes!!)

You asked:

Could Wexford pull off a shock win?
The Oracle replied:

Not unless you do something to change the course of events.
(I expect a PM from the Tyrone county board shortly)

You asked:

What are next week’s lotto numbers?
The Oracle replied:

6, 18, 22, 32, 33, 37, 39.
(Hmm, perhaps I shouldn't have shared this one)

smashey

You asked:

Who will win the Ulster GAA football championship next year?

The Oracle replied:
Neil Diamond.


You asked:

Who is the top moderator on boards.ie?

The Oracle replied:
Steven Spielberg

Nalced_irl

DeepBlue wrote: »

You asked:

Surely Tyrone will win the championship?
The Oracle replied:

Hmm yes.
(Yikes!!)

You asked:

Could Wexford pull off a shock win?
The Oracle replied:

Not unless you do something to change the course of events.
(I expect a PM from the Tyrone county board shortly)

Ha! These are good ones alright!

yayamark

You asked:
Will Kerry beat Tyrone in the 2008 All Ireland Senior Football Final?

---

The Oracle replied:
I’m positive about this.

:):):):):):D:D:D:D

Enough said close the Gaa Forum until Next February!

smashey

yayamark wrote: »

You asked:
Will Kerry beat Tyrone in the 2008 All Ireland Senior Football Final?

---

The Oracle replied:
I’m positive about this.

:):):):):):D:D:D:D

Enough said close the Gaa Forum until Next February!

You asked:
Will Tyrone beat Kerry in the All Ireland final?
The Oracle replied:
Right now I’m in the mood for a ’no’ answer. Don’t share this with others. It is highly confidential.

It must be true then.

/edit
I asked the same question a minute later and got the following...

I sure hope so.

:D:D

Nalced_irl

smashey wrote: »

You asked:
Will Tyrone beat Kerry in the All Ireland final?
The Oracle replied:
Right now I’m in the mood for a ’no’ answer. Don’t share this with others. It is highly confidential.

It must be true then.

/edit
I asked the same question a minute later and got the following...



:D:D

You asked:

Im banned from Adverts.ie and unsure why. Who should i ask about it?
The Oracle replied:

Canada is to blame.


Im gonna use this excuse if i ever get banned there Smashey

smashey

Nalced_irl wrote: »

You asked:

Im banned from Adverts.ie and unsure why. Who should i ask about it?
The Oracle replied:

Canada is to blame.


Im gonna use this excuse if i ever get banned there Smashey

Leave the Canucks out of it. I can guarantee it will be me.