Relationship Problem.....

Galwaylad2008

HI i was wondering if someone out there Man/Woman if they could help me out.....

I have been going out with my Girlfriend for nearly 3 years now were both 21yrs old and im just getting the feeling she is becoming distant with me, im always the one who is askn to meet up and hang out and all she says is she like her own space, but i do admit that she's always been like that thoe, but i find that it kinda getting worse lately.... I even heard from her friend recently that she thinks she mite be to young for a long term relationship and that all her friends are all sngle and she feels different when she is out with them and doesnt know what to do....

But i just wanna know what do i do??? I don't wanna lose her.....
Could someone tell me wt all this means im just confused and need help???

Miss Fluff

Galwaylad2008 wrote: »

I even heard from her friend recently that she thinks she mite be to young for a long term relationship and that all her friends are all sngle and she feels different when she is out with them and doesnt know what to do....?

You really need to talk to your girlfriend about this rather than relying on the bush telegraph for snippets of hearsay. Arrange to meet up and ask her if she is happy etc.

Sheena99

I'd have to agree, maybe you should ask her straight out. It's very possible she might be feeling too involved for her age, you're both very young, but taking a break for a while might be the best thing for both of you and doesn't have to mean the end either. It could make her realise how lucky she is to have you, or unfortunately it may not. But if she's feeling antsy or a bit tied down, letting that situation lie will only make it worse and make any discussions down the line more heated. Good luck with it, hth.

Fat Pie Lot

Yes, talk to her. That's the only way you'll get to the bottom of the issue and identify any solutions.

Galwaylad2008

Hi im looking for advice off women or men.

I have been going out with my girlfriend for nearly 3 years now were both in around 21/22 years old. Shes alot more maturer than i am but im still think of myself as mature and sensible aswel you know.

But recently her friend came up to me and was telln me she didnt know if she was to young for a long term relationship, just cause most of her friends are single and she says she feels different when shes out with them like as if there all looking for boys and shes not.

But im just confused and i don't know what she means by all this? Is there anyone out there that knows what this is about?

Also what should i do to change this, I Love her so much and would do anything for her. Please don't say talk to her because i have done all that and all im getting is im grand theres nothing wrong with me and that we are good.

I really need your advice please!

Thanks!!

Galwaylad2008

Miss Fluff wrote: »

You really need to talk to your girlfriend about this rather than relying on the bush telegraph for snippets of hearsay. Arrange to meet up and ask her if she is happy etc.

Hey i have tlked to her and said you know is everything ok with you and us, and all she keeps saying is that we are grand don't worry....

But you know thats easier said than done.....

So you know i have done all that....

Im just confused by what she means by she doesnt know if she is to young for a long term relationship??? but i do wanna save her and us.

I don't think i could go on a break, i don't think it would turn out good thoe??

Zaph

Another one for PI

Moved from The Ladies Lounge

Galwaylad2008

Zaph wrote: »

Another one for PI

Moved from The Ladies Lounge

What do you mean by "Another one for PI

Moved from The Ladies Lounge"

Sorry i dnt understand??

Victor

He is saying the thread isn't suit to TLL and has moved it to PI. I have merged the two threads.

Skitbra

Hi OP,

I have to say it sounds all too familiar with 2 of my relationships. One of which just ended there recently. I could be completely wrong but I think that she probably wants to move on. She might not know really what she wants to do but maybe she just feels like she's too young for a long term relationship and maybe she doesn't see you two ever settling down. I hate to be sounding pessimistic, and maybe my recent breakup has something to do with it so remember that, but you're both 21, and this relationship probably won't last. She wants to go out and discover the world.
I hope I'm wrong for your sake, but have it out with her and get a proper answer once and for all. You can't go along with the way you're feeling for much longer. If she wants to breakup it's better to do it now and remove her from your life as soon as possible.

Skitbra

Fat Pie Lot

Galwaylad2008 wrote: »

Hey i have tlked to her and said you know is everything ok with you and us, and all she keeps saying is that we are grand don't worry....

But you know thats easier said than done.....

So you know i have done all that....

Im just confused by what she means by she doesnt know if she is to young for a long term relationship??? but i do wanna save her and us.

I don't think i could go on a break, i don't think it would turn out good thoe??

I'm having a hard time thinking that you've sat down with her and actually talked things through. If she's saying things to her friends, then consider that a good thing. She's not talking out of school or anything... she's just looking for advice, just as you are here.

However, you're now aware that she's having these concerns, so address them. Don't just ask if she's OK as you seem to have done. Sit her down and ask her how's she's feeling, voice your own concerns, tell her that you've heard she's having concerns about her own life. If there are issues, then maybe you can come to a solution without needing to break up or take a break. It might simply be that she's at that point in her life where she needs change. You won't know until you face it head on.

Galwaylad2008

Fat Pie Lot wrote: »

I'm having a hard time thinking that you've sat down with her and actually talked things through. If she's saying things to her friends, then consider that a good thing. She's not talking out of school or anything... she's just looking for advice, just as you are here.

However, you're now aware that she's having these concerns, so address them. Don't just ask if she's OK as you seem to have done. Sit her down and ask her how's she's feeling, voice your own concerns, tell her that you've heard she's having concerns about her own life. If there are issues, then maybe you can come to a solution without needing to break up or take a break. It might simply be that she's at that point in her life where she needs change. You won't know until you face it head on.

Would this have anything to do with the way shes feeling???

"Someone really close to her died recently, and i know she's not herself so i put it down to that??would that make sense or not???"

Like it was a relation that died and i know it hurt her alot, and shes just ben down nd out you know???

Im sorry im not making excuses now or anything..

What do you think??

Fat Pie Lot

Galwaylad2008 wrote: »

Would this have anything to do with the way shes feeling???

"Someone really close to her died recently, and i know she's not herself so i put it down to that??would that make sense or not???"

Like it was a relation that died and i know it hurt her alot, and shes just ben down nd out you know???

Im sorry im not making excuses now or anything..

What do you think??

It's possible, but I really can't say. I don't know the girl in question. That's something you'll only find out by sitting down and talking to her.

cson

She's looking for a lifestyle change and unfortunately that means without you. I'm gonna borrow Wibbs' rhetoric here and say that if you want to save this you have to let go > i.e. Most people who breakup and completely let go of each other are the people who are mos likely to make it back together (and stronger) a second time.

Its tough, but you'll pull through.

cwhooley

I know that feeling. Someone is with you but slipping away at the same time. You can sometimes feel lonlier with someone when things in a relationship are not what they should be and you are struggling to hold on to someone who is drifting. It sounds to be as if you girlfried is at a crossroads. Part of her wants you and the relationship and the other part wants to be single and fee like her friends. She sounds a tad torn. You are both so young and both care so much for each other but you seem to be in different places and want different things at the moment. That fear of loosing someone is awful. I think you have to accept for the moment that she is in a confused place and wants two different things. It's not that she does'nt love you, it's just where she is at the moment. C

Lucy Lu

As Dudara has already said, please do not drag up old threads.

Thanks