im a relationship ruiner :|

jackbutler

im only 15 (yes i know, relationships dont mean anything at my age) but every girl that ive been with has ended up being chucked by me because of reasons that made no sense.

for example, the last relationship i was in, i broke it off cuz i was getting jealous when she would talk to other guys a lot, and i thought my jealousy would make her hate me, and id rather have her as a friend, than as a girlfriend who hates me.

im going out with a girl now, its only been 3 months, but i like the experience this time around.
but the thing is, shes not had a boyfriend before, which may sound fine, but being 16, she seems to know a tiny amount about relationships.

shes naturally shy, never talking much to people she doesnt know, never being the life of the party. thats fine, thats great, im talkative, opposites attract after all. but i feel like sometimes shes too shy, if we're out walking around town ill hold her hand, make her feel comfortable around me, try to get her to unwind, but still id have to start every conversation, ask every question, cuz she doesnt do it herself.

its almost like she ignores me, and this feeling makes me think that she likes me a hell of a lot less than i like her/than she liked me in the beginning. its the tiny things, like on msn, if i log on, she wont say hi to me, she'll wait for me to do it. and if i stop talking for some reason, she wont talk whatsoever.

I KNOW I KNOW. shes shy, and shes not been with someone before, but after 3 months, dont you think she'd have lightened up a bit?

shes a great girl, gorgeous, always leaves me with a smile on my face, but looking back on all that other stuff, is the relationship meaning anything?

i know if i break up with her ill regret it like ive regretted so many times before, but should i talk to her about it or leave it?

help me boardsies

B00MSTICK

Dude, you're cleary not happy now, so unless you want to continue like this I'd talk to her.

randylonghorn

Jack, at 15 you're at an age where relationships are often quite short, so I wouldn't worry too much about that.

The girl you are with at the moment sounds very shy, and that's difficult and means you'll have to be patient. That said, no harm at all to address some of the bits that bother you with her, but do it gently and slowly ... one small step at a time, taking it lightly, rather than getting het up and giving her a long list of her "faults" some evening.

The jealousy, watch closely ... it's not unusual especially when you're young, but do try to leave it behind. I've seen more relationships ruined by stupid and unfounded jealousy than by any other single factor, I think, and unfortunately some people don't seem to grow out of it!

Marksie

15: Raging hormones, massive insecurities, no life experience.

Your flitting from one to another and are looking at somoene else and putting your interpretation on her behaviour. That is stemming from your own thinking. really analysing this too deeply.

16 is as inexperienced as yourself really, so she is in the same boat.

But its part of growing up OP to learn to deal with others in a mature fashion, and you learn by your past mistakes (or should, gods help us there are those a lot older than you who still cannot).
So yes, talk to her, you have said you will have regrets (and 15 is really too young to have regrets).

But this is the time you should be learning about interrelationships and yourself as your are developing and will continue to develop.