Another 3 Yrs of Pat Kenny? Just say NO!!!

Raiser

Its been reported in the newspapers that RTE's €848,000+ per annum Wooden Dummy is in protracted wrangling re. his new contract. In particular its been reported that he is refusing to sign this contract due to a disagreement over the length of same. Seemingly Woody McPlank is demanding a further 3 year stint draining the coffers of the Pat Kenny tax [TV License] - leaving only €172.50 left to keep the entire cast of Fair City from loitering outside HMV.

- Now as a people we Irish seem to be able to tolerate just about anything; we had 800 years of British occupation and as they beat the Gaelic tongue out of us and exported crops during a cruel famine we just set our jaws and grimly got on with it. But can the Country really withstand 3 more years of that meticulously chiselled, sanded and varnished face, his hollow fake laughs, faux witticisms and barn-door missing "charm".

Pat Kenny might someday be a pro-tennis player, award winning author or possibly even a famous painter - who knows??? But one thing is for sure he lacks the basic charm, aptitude and fundamental, essential skills required to present live television.

Perhaps if you share this opinion and take a second to add your voice then we can build up an online petition and then let the RTE Chiefs know in a very clear manner that they shouldn't be too concerned about the possibility of this vacuous woodworm walking, because as it stands their constant support of "ahm just gardening in your garden" Kenny defies all reason - and while you're at it why not suggest who you would like to see in the Late Late Show Studio in place of The Cuprinol Man of Donnybrook Dublin 4.......

Karoma

Moved, but feel free to move it back.

An on-line petition? This could work! This must work! This will work! Why has nobody thought of it before? Where do I sign?

biko

€848,000+ per annum

How the hell can he, or any RTE personality, be worth that much? Crazy I tell you.

ejmaztec

Raiser wrote: »

Perhaps if you share this opinion and take a second to add your voice then we can build up an online petition and then let the RTE Chiefs know

The RTE "Gods" won't be listening to the likes of the licence-paying viewing public - they never did. They must know the small calibre of the man and what the majority seem to think of him, but he's still there shovelling money into the back of his truck and laughing loudly as he does so.

I reckon he's got some compromising photos somewhere, possibly in a safe-deposit box. :eek:

Raiser

ejmaztec wrote: »

The RTE "Gods" won't be listening to the likes of the licence-paying viewing public - they never did. They must know the small calibre of the man and what the majority seem to think of him, but he's still there shovelling money into the back of his truck and laughing loudly as he does so.

I reckon he's got some compromising photos somewhere, possibly in a safe-deposit box. :eek:

Couldn't just have been all that gorse though could it, lots of stuff up there I reckon

Mossy Monk

Whatever about his tv abilities he is a fantastic radio presenter.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

biko wrote: »

How the hell can he, or any RTE personality, be worth that much? Crazy I tell you.

He has pictures. Compromising pictures, and it did happen...

ejmaztec

Raiser wrote: »

Couldn't just have been all that gorse though could it, lots of stuff up there I reckon

Yes, they should invite Channel 4's Time-Team over from the UK for a bit of a poke around. That'd be worth watching. :P

BoardsRanger

Agree with you entirely OP (nice writing style you have also). As for replacements, id like to see Tubridy or David McWilliams

elurhs

The Late Late is still RTE's highest rated programme, and there seems to be a thread here for every episode when it's on. Pat ain't going nowhere until he retires, face it. The fact that he's a poor presenter doesn't seem to affect the ratings.

godtabh

biko wrote: »

How the hell can he, or any RTE personality, be worth that much? Crazy I tell you.

People of an older generation like him. RTE dont make tv programs for under 30s

JerryHandbag

Pat should audition for the next Terminator movie, would be ideal for the robotic lead role....in his place on the Late Late should be.....Billy Connolly!

nomorebadtown

NWS!!!

ejmaztec

elurhs wrote: »

The Late Late is still RTE's highest rated programme, and there seems to be a thread here for every episode when it's on. Pat ain't going nowhere until he retires, face it. The fact that he's a poor presenter doesn't seem to affect the ratings.

After giving this a lot of thought, I can only imagine that it has something to do with the guy who drove his car into the doors of RTE when the Late Late was on. Perhaps people don't want to miss his second attempt at the wheel of a petrol tanker.

4zn76tysfajdxp

kearnsr wrote: »

People of an older generation like him. RTE dont make tv programs for under 30s

He's right, old people love Pat because he gives them exactly what they want.

JerryHandbag

ejmaztec wrote: »

After giving this a lot of thought, I can only imagine that it has something to do with the guy who drove his car into the doors of RTE when the Late Late was on. Perhaps people don't want to miss his second attempt at the wheel of a petrol tanker.

And who could forget the guy that walked on set and hurled a mouthful at Pat...."You insufferable arsehole!"

Wasnt the same guy that rammed the RTE doors was it??

Raiser

JerryHandbag wrote: »

And who could forget the guy that walked on set and hurled a mouthful at Pat...."You insufferable arsehole!"

Wasnt the same guy that rammed the RTE doors was it??

One and the same - apparently he was petitioning the Road Safety Authority re. a scheme he had devised to ensure speeding Glanzas became impervious to the resistant tendencies of immovable objects.

http://www.independent.ie/national-news/late-lates-wacky-invader-on-a-mission-to-stop-road-deaths-137384.html
http://www.rte.ie/news/2006/1204/rte.html

Elmo

So who should take over from Pat Kenny in Sept if the contract wasn't signed.

Don't Say Ryan Tubrity! anyone else bar Turbrity, he has his own show.

If it was up to me I would say no to Pat, give him a year's TV contract and a 3 year radio contract. And for his retirement a nice sunday afternoon on Lyric.

Dont be at yourself

Wow, what a disgrace. He's a robot, Alan Partridge's long lost older brother.

Who could replace him? I'd love to see Dara O'Briain take the job. He's funny, charismatic, experienced, and he's also well capable of handling the more serious side of things. He appeals to young people, but he's not all white-teeth, snappy-suit and slick-hair, so he should sit well with the older audience too.

ejmaztec

I think that RTE should renew the plank's contract for three years, on condition that the Late Late is sponsored by Woodies DIY. :pac:

humanji

Savanna Rapid Knickers wrote: »

He's right, old people love Pat because he gives them exactly what they want.

A reason to die?

Sherifu

humanji wrote: »

A reason to die?

I'd thank if I could.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Sherifu wrote: »

I'd thank if I could.

I did it for you!

Disssgruntled

Does Fear Factor make you squirm on the couch? Do you get the stomach churning "gawks" when you see the contestants drinking down a jug of testicles that have been barely passed through a blender?

That’s nothing on the cringe-o-meter when compared to Pat Kenny "establishing a rapport" with a female guest whom he wants to appear to be "engaging" with. - My missus dry-heaves and leaves the room in sympathy.

Would Derek Davis ever qualify as a host? I know it might seem a strange choice but heard him on the radio recently and he seemed to be great at provoking interesting discussion while lobbing in a lot of good points along the way.

Or even Ray Darcy?

Anyway RTE Chiefs - Pat Kenny shouldn't have this arena to himself indefinitely, based on his consistently poor performance its just not fair on the license fee-paying public.

Mossy Monk

Ray D'arcy? Thank **** he doesn't have a chat show on TV.

You mention licence fee payers. What about the hundreds of thousands that tune in every week?

ejmaztec

Mossy Monk wrote: »

You mention licence fee payers. What about the hundreds of thousands that tune in every week?

RTE could put a DIY carpentry programme on for them "101 Things to do with wood", or an eco-series about trees.

Firetrap

Never fear. Come September he'll be back presenting the Late Late. If the powers that be in RTÉ had any guts, they'd give him the heave-ho from the Late Late but God only knows what sort of politics are going on in the background.

It's a pity he insists on presenting the thing. He's excellent on radio and I'm sure if he was on a current affairs television program he'd be good on that too. Is it safe to say that presenting the Late Late Show is the biggest gig in RTÉ? There's no way he's going to be dislodged from that. It's all tactics (or should that be tictacs?) so he can get a better deal. And what's more, he'll get it.

Pigman II

Plank is like a billboard (not in so far that both or made of wood but) that he only retains power as long people still notice his existence.

He's laughing all the way to the bank at people who feel the compulsion to continually point out that he is a dire presenter and a waste of money. Best thing you all could do is just forget about him entirely and then he will disappear just like other major social problems such as amazonian deforestation and AIDS.

loyatemu

be careful what you wish for - if they did let him walk it would probably be Tubridy taking his place.

anyway, regardless of who they get to do it, it'll be sh1t. Its a relic from the 70s - chat shows are just a pointless vehicle for vacuous celebrities trying to hawk their latest "product".

humanji

That's a good thing. If Turbridy takes over then there's only a shìte chat show on 1 night a week instead of 2! Every cloud has a silver lining.

UrbanFox

A petition to RTE is probably a waste of time.

RTE use the modern form of public consultation ;

Step 1 : Decide what RTE wants to do.

Step 2 : Announce it.

Step 3 : Let the public protest and give them the illusion that their thoughts actually matter a jot.

Step 4 : RTE then do what they intended at first only with the addendum that the decision was taken after widespread public consultation.


They could always turn it into CELEBRITY LATE LATE SHOW is which one of a string of edgets presents an edition each week until April. A kind of reprise of that Saturday Live thing....

The ultimate deciding factor will be MONEY. If Kenny overprices himself in the present economic climate that might just give RTE justification to wave him off...That might also be the possibility that enables RTE to kill the Late Late for once and for ever

Mossy Monk

UrbanFox wrote: »

That might also be the possibility that enables RTE to kill the Late Late for once and for ever

Why would you want a programme that people enjoy to be killed off? Have you one tv channel or no world outside your window for the 2 hours a week that it is shown?

KnifeWRENCH

BoardsRanger wrote: »

Agree with you entirely OP (nice writing style you have also). As for replacements, id like to see Tubridy or David McWilliams

MCWILLIAMS? :eek:
I'd rather Plank get 2 million a year than see that arrogant cnunt on my TV.
Tubridy is actually an ok host, he was better on radio though.

Miriam O'Callaghan would probably be a good enough host. Would certainly increase the male demographic!

darkman2

JerryHandbag wrote: »

And who could forget the guy that walked on set and hurled a mouthful at Pat...."You insufferable arsehole!"

Wasnt the same guy that rammed the RTE doors was it??

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vIHC-Gv0kPE

hellbent

Truly there's no one from RTE capable of taking the helm on the Late Late in place of Pat Kenny. He's wooden and stiff with the celebrity types, but good with serious stuff, and he doesn't let us down with idiotic comments.

Maybe the answer is to have, say, a trio of presenters - Kenny, Derek Davis and Ryan Tubridy, each presenting a different type of show when their turn comes round?

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

He needs the money. Remember: we're paying his legal fees for a boundary wall.

Firetrap

RTÉ haven't got a great track record when it comes to breeding new talent. The same old faces keep cropping up. It is hard to see who could replace Pat Kenny. The Late Late being one of RTE's flagship programs, they're not going to put an untested face in the chair.

As an aside, I've enjoyed some of Radio 1's stand-in presenters this summer. I wonder would any of them work on TV? Has Rachel English (who's been doing a sterling job covering for Marian Finucane) ever done TV presenting? I like her as a radio presenter. She seems very natural and warm and can handle both current affairs (her previous job on 5-7 ) and lighter stuff.

lostinsuperfunk

Whatever about his tv abilities he is a fantastic radio presenter.

I'm afraid I disagree with this. To paraphrase mongrel magazine, people say he's much better on the radio, but that's only because at least you can't see the f"<ker when he's on the radio.

Dara O'Briain would be an interesting choice. I also thought Sean Moncrieff's brief stint in chat show land wasn't bad, perhaps a bit hit or miss, but I'm sure he could do well given time and a good support team. I think Miriam O'Callaghan would be even worse than His Plankness. She has no rapport with her guests and has a very disconcerting habit of abruptly switching the discussion from serious topics to complete sh!te. Also she gets paid almost as much as Two by Four. Derek Davis would be great if he could be tempted out of retirement, but I bet he'd prefer to spend the time fishing.

jawb_792

I have made a general petition about RTE. Please sign everybody.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74efgoeM9-o
http://www.petitiononline.com/rte/petition.html

mickd

BoardsRanger wrote: »

Agree with you entirely OP (nice writing style you have also). As for replacements, id like to see Tubridy or David McWilliams

Then we wonder why RTE is in a mess

mickd

UrbanFox wrote: »

That might also be the possibility that enables RTE to kill the Late Late for once and for ever

If only, it would be the best thing they did in 10 years.

Elmo

If only, it would be the best thing they did in 10 years.

We all know that would be madness, it would be like the BBC axing EastEnders or ITV axing Corronation Street. It may be nice but they would be committing suicide.

Raiser

I believe Biffo Cowen is going to be a guest on the [next] Late Late - Wait until you see how smug Pat Kenny looks after getting our TV License money for another 3 years and how smug Brian Cowen looks after doing God only knows what with our tax revenue :rolleyes:

Its going to be a riot watching those two puppets with their big wooden ventriloquist dummy heads, beady glass eyes and those little hinged mouths flapping open and closed as they repeat their lines........

Where's the vomit smiley gone ???

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

Raiser wrote: »

I believe Biffo Cowen is going to be a guest on the [next] Late Late - Wait until you see how smug Pat Kenny looks after getting our TV License money for another 3 years and how smug Brian Cowen looks after doing God only knows what with our tax revenue :rolleyes:

Its going to be a riot watching those two puppets with their big wooden ventriloquist dummy heads, beady glass eyes and those little hinged mouths flapping open and closed as they repeat their lines........

Where's the vomit smiley gone ???

****. And here's me in a forewign coutnry. Anyone know where I can get an urgent stream of the night's proceedings?

Art Deco

I reckon Cagney should get it

*runs and hides*

Elmo

I reckon Cagney should get it

*runs and hides*

TV3 are giving him a week of TV, for some state of the nation something or other.

For the LOVE OF GOD. NO.

Pat Kenny seems to have a personality around Cagney, imagine Cagney being interviews by Kenny now there is an interview for the new season.