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Slippery Slope

  • 20-08-2008 3:53pm
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    My job I love, I like the people I work with and of course I love my family but I’m so lonely, it’s crushing. I do have friends but most of them are married and so are always busy which is understandable. I do try to make an effort to see them and to keep in contact with others that I’ve meet through my life but everyone seems to have other things planned.

    I tried to commit suicide about 11 years ago and know the effect it had on my family but the thoughts of trying again are slowly coming back. I’m doing my best to push them aside and stay positive.

    I’ve tried making new single friends, gone out with boards a few times, taken up new hobbies, and at the moment I’m trying to find something to do that will involve meeting others ……but every time I try I seem to hit a brick wall.

    I don’t want to get to as low a point as I did 11 years ago but I can feel myself slipping that way and I don’t know how to stop it.


Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 533 ✭✭✭SpookyDoll


    Aw OP <<hugs>>.....life can be such a b1tch cant it, have you tried any group therapy because sometimes it helps just to know you are not alone....and really you are not, there are so many people out there who go through it.

    Good for you for making the efforts with meeting people and taking things up, it is so hard, I know what you mean about a "brick wall" and everyone seeming to be busy all the time....


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,673 ✭✭✭Miss Fluff


    Do you socialise with your work crew? You say you like them and get on well so how about suggesting going out for a few drinks etc?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,610 ✭✭✭Karen_*


    Forbidden when you feel really low it can seem like everyone else has it all together but I can assure you that they don't. You have some good things in your life at the moment but you're just very lonely and down. And you really don't want to kill yourself you just need a bit of a helping hand with things.

    How did you find it when you went out with the boards people? What sort of hobbies have you taken up and what ideas do you have for meeting people?

    There are loads of people have posted on here who feel lost and miserable so even by that you can see you're not the only one. Not that that makes you feel any better but you're already making great steps to help yourself. Because you do want a better life for yourself and I stress the word life.

    Theres alot of people on here who've made really good friends on these boards. Its really helped alot of people because all of us at once stage or another have felt like you do.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,172 ✭✭✭Flojo


    Try to be strong hun, maybe confide in a close friend or relative and let them know that you're feeling this way so that they can keep an eye on you and offer support.

    Suicide is not the answer, keep up what you're and things will get easier. You just need some time to make everything fall into place. :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    I have attemped to socialise with the girls in work, but they are quite a bit younger so it's kinda difficult. I went a while ago with one of the girls in work and we had a good night but she has started hanging out with the younger girls and even thought in the nicest possible way I have tried to invite myself along, as in if they are going out...

    "Are you heaing to town this week?
    Ye
    Let me know where and I'll join you if you don't mind
    Sure, will let you know"

    Never seem to get back to me but the plans are all discussed when I'm around. Not going to force my company on the either.

    I know I don't want to kill myself even if it's for the sake of family and friends and I know I got through this before and will again without the stupid act this time but I can feel myself getting as low as I did before and that's quite scary.

    I've never tried group therapy but I've gone to one on one sessions before, personally I never found it THAT helpful and I did pour my heart out to them.

    First time I went to boards beers was daunting and it didn't help that I wasn't drinking that night, not a good idea for your first soley attempt and boards beers. Been out twice with the ladies of the ladies lounge and that was good fun.

    I'm looking to take up tennis, never played before so I will probably need lessons which I dont' mind but at least it's something I can do in club and is not weather permitting.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,172 ✭✭✭Flojo


    Keep going to Boards beers then, great that you enjoyed them! :D
    Try make friends with some Boardies and maybe start some unofficial beers nights and hopefully make some good friends in the process.
    If you feel like tennis go for it! Good luck with everything hope it all starts to feel a lot better soon.

    Take care


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,610 ✭✭✭Karen_*


    Well when you feel down then everything is an effort and sometimes you can feel lonlier out in a crowd that you would by yourself. But all I can say is keep trying. It really will get better and remember you're brilliant for actually getting up and doing something about how you're feeling.

    PM any of us on here if you need a buddy to walk into the beers with or go for a drink beforehand even. Even pop along for an hour. There's loads of people on here who welcome more friends and would hate to think someone is feeling like you are.

    Tennis is brilliant fun and you get a very mixed crowd at it. I might even learn it myself in between the tango classes and the yoga! We've all been where you are now and its not easy but with a bit of perseverance things will change. Slowly but surely.


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