My Life and Job

LegacyUser

This is weird, i literally just realised. My job seems to take over all aspects of my life.
I have only been in this job a short time (approx since Jan) and I'm not particularly important. I really like it also. Its just that, I feel like I'm constantly doing things wrong and making mistakes. Its easy to do in this job, but when I do, I take it home with me. Sometimes I can't sleep over it.

What can I do?

LoanShark

I'm guessing its an office job..
You're Only Paid to Work From 9-5..
I dont know if you're in Dublin or not, But for some reason People who work in Dublin seem to think that they have take their work home with them OR work late..My gf and I moved out of dublin about six months ago and in her office job if it can't be sorted during working hours,Then it'll be looked at tomorrow..Her boss asks her is she not going home this would be at 5.35 and they finish work at 5.30..

When you walk out the door,your out of work!!

LegacyUser

Yep, I work in Dublin, its just hard cos my mistakes affect eveyone, I think I'm maybe too hard on myself

jester77

Once you leave the office forget about it. In all my years working I've never given my job a second thought once I walked out the door. Think about what you are going to be doing for the evening, what you are going to eat, who you are going to be meeting, etc. Remember it's only a job!

pug_lover

It's a downward spiral and will lead to burn out... just learn to switch off once you leave and do things that you enjoy in the evenings

05D

If its getting you down, mention it to your line manager, maybe about some refresh training.

Also hypnotherapy can be good for concentration and focusing.

How Strange

OPEN POSTER wrote: »

This is weird, i literally just realised. My job seems to take over all aspects of my life.
I have only been in this job a short time (approx since Jan) and I'm not particularly important. I really like it also. Its just that, I feel like I'm constantly doing things wrong and making mistakes. Its easy to do in this job, but when I do, I take it home with me. Sometimes I can't sleep over it.
What can I do?

I've seen lots of people carry on like this in different companies. Their jobs might not be the most important job in the company, they are just part of an overall process - admin, purchasing, finance but they just can't switch off and start doing things like staying late and coming in on Saturdays to 'finish things off'.

Most of them wanted to appear to be indespensible and would spend every hour outside work talking about their jobs.

Bottom line OP, you get paid to work an agreed set of hours and your salary is supposed to fund your lifestyle.

Get a hobby, take up interests that demand some of your free time and every evening when you're supposed to finish work, turn off your pc, go home and forget about it until the next day.

It's only a job no matter how important it may seem to you.

Dixie Chick

I use to be like this when i was a trainee.i used to lie in bed thinking about all the masses of work i had to do and i actually did have a bnreaking point about 2 years in and basically cried at my desk at the slightest thing. Not a good place to be in. At the time though I did have an extremely tough and almost bully-ish boss. If you are staying on longer than your managers then there is a problem, i would suggest doing time management or self assurance courses

Daisygirl

Down with that sort of thing!!
I agree with all posters here. I was that bunny, working late, working Saturday's, worrying about when & how I'll get the work done. A couple years of this and you begin working to survive... Your health suffers and your social life becomes a shell of what it used to be if non existent - well that's what happened to me.

You need to start where you want to finish. Take a leaf from my book and start at 9am finish at 5.30pm, go home and live your life. No job is worth the stress and at the end of the day you are only a number and everybody is replacable. Your boss will appreciate it more if you work your hardest whilst you are in work and don't knock yourself down - everyone is important why else would you be there

Best of luck x

LegacyUser

Thanks to everyone for their advice, I'll defo take it on board.

Its really warming being able to come on here any get advice.

Thanks again

ve

I was the exact same also. Then a senior engineer where I was working at the time, took my aside one day and said..."Work to Live or live to work, it's your choice". The funny thing is when I did stop talking about work during lunch breaks or taking work home my boss did notice and although didn't say anything, he did not react well and got more snappy in his demands.

I think there are a lot of companies out there that will intentionally manipulate individuals in to thinking that they are part of a "club", and if you don't work hard, you will let the "club" down and you will be singled out. But of course deny this down to the ground. Then everyone is terrified to question in case they are instantly singled out. I have left that scene myself, but still have friends who finish work at 5:30pm and if they don't attend "team building" evenings out, they will be singled out and frowned upon. Also they are constantly going to work on Saturday mornings to "get things finished" for Monday.

Personally I am wary of companies that put pressure on newcommers to socialise and "team build" with co-workers. I think it's just creating a system whereby you will feel pressured not to let these new "friends" down.

Fifilefleure

ve wrote: »

I was the exact same also. Then a senior engineer where I was working at the time, took my aside one day and said..."Work to Live or live to work, it's your choice". The funny thing is when I did stop talking about work during lunch breaks or taking work home my boss did notice and although didn't say anything, he did not react well and got more snappy in his demands.

I think there are a lot of companies out there that will intentionally manipulate individuals in to thinking that they are part of a "club", and if you don't work hard, you will let the "club" down and you will be singled out. But of course deny this down to the ground. Then everyone is terrified to question in case they are instantly singled out. I have left that scene myself, but still have friends who finish work at 5:30pm and if they don't attend "team building" evenings out, they will be singled out and frowned upon. Also they are constantly going to work on Saturday mornings to "get things finished" for Monday..

I agree with the above. Work should be something that you enjoy however not to the point that it effects you in your personal life. You will not be on your death bed saying that your glad you worked for 40 yeats!! You will be thinking of your friends, family & life experiences!! Sorry if it sound morbid!! lol

Just be careful & you need to find a way to deal with the work & not bring it home with you!!

estar

Dixie Chick wrote: »

I use to be like this when i was a trainee.i used to lie in bed thinking about all the masses of work i had to do and i actually did have a bnreaking point about 2 years in and basically cried at my desk at the slightest thing. Not a good place to be in. At the time though I did have an extremely tough and almost bully-ish boss. If you are staying on longer than your managers then there is a problem, i would suggest doing time management or self assurance courses

i am at that thinking about work all the time and thinking about mistakes

at the end of the day its not the mistakes its - do you fix them, do you find them do you make sure they don;t happen again

thats what i tell myself even though i still have cried over my job!!!!

thebaldsoprano

How about fighting fire with fire and taking up a few demanding hobbies?
They'll get out out of the office at 5:30 and totally get your mind off things.

Just a thought...

LegacyUser

Just read this message board, am in the exact same boat myself and have just probably ruined my wife and i wend because of my job. I have a fairly "seniorish" job i suppose, customer manager and have a very difficult customer, anyway things blew up last Thursday but it's been on my mind since then and all wend, to the point where i cant sleep or eat even..and fighting with my wife obviously!!

I just find i'm constantly thinking about it and worrying to the point where it is affecting my life outside, really wish i could shut off but find it hard, just reading through some of the replies, really have to convince myself it's only a job, i'm well aware people are indispensible, just really need to get my head around the idea job stops at 5..

So to the OP, you're not the only one in this situation!