i HATE small talk

newballsplease

you know when you meet someone you might have been in school with or havent seen them in a while......that talk when ye say hello, wat r ya up 2 these days...bla bla bla, and then you go on your way again,and dont see that person for another cuple of months/years!. IT CRACKS ME UP.

How do i get out of this? just pretend i dont see the person??

i think its actually impossible to avoid this kind of talk!

thefinalstage

newballsplease wrote: »

you know when you meet someone you might have been in school with or havent seen them in a while......that talk when ye say hello, wat r ya up 2 these days...bla bla bla, and then you go on your way again,and dont see that person for another cuple of months/years!. IT CRACKS ME UP.

How do i get out of this? just pretend i dont see the person??

i think its actually impossible to avoid this kind of talk!

"**** off"

CountingCrows

So much anger for one so young

Seachmall

I usually fill the small talk moments with ackward silences. I love awkward silences, they always make me smile but I can't because its supposed to be awkward, so much fun:D

Wurly

I've actually said to someone 'listen, let's not bother with this sh*te of small talk'.

They looked as relieved as I was. Both of us were wincing when we made eye contact so there was no point. Life's too short.

We both smiled and went on our merry ways.

Haven't seen the person since.:D

Captain Darling

Seachmall wrote: »

I usually fill the small talk moments with ackward silences. I love awkward silences, they always make me smile but I can't because its supposed to be awkward, so much fun:D

You're weird:D

Seachmall

Captain Darling wrote: »

You're weird:D

Don't despise it tills you tries it:P

BroomBurner

I hate small talk too, so would just pretend I didn't see them. Though I'm normally not wearing my glasses so the chances are that I saw them but couldn't actually make out their face. Ah, sometimes crappy eyesight is a bonus

Pighead

Alright lads, rotten weather out there isn't it. So what are you young tykes up to for the weekend. Any plans?

Zangetsu

Small talk is just being polite, if you want to cut down on it try to actualy get to know them instead of "you see the match..." "yeah..." will it ever stop raining..." "nah dont think so".

Put some effort in or just don't talk to them...

Irishcrx

Ah your just a bloody grump, just tell them your ignorant and have no time for people i'm sure they won't "Bother" you again...

newballsplease

Tri wrote: »

I've actually said to someone 'listen, let's not bother with this sh*te of small talk'.

They looked as relieved as I was. Both of us were wincing when we made eye contact so there was no point. Life's too short.

We both smiled and went on our merry ways.

Haven't seen the person since.:D

I like it!!
the usuall question is, so, what are you at with urself these days?

i usually say, ah this and that.
what i feel like saying is- 'im standing here wasting my time talking to a prick like you'!

Captain Darling

I hate small talk becasue it usually goes like this......

Them: Hey Captain, how are things?

Me: Hello....(cough cant remember your name), hello!

Them: How are they all at home?

Me: Fine thanks. Errr....... how are your parents keeping?

Them: Do you not remember? They died tragically in the most unusual circumstances, involving an inflatable duck and bovril.

Me: Oh yeah, right, sorry about that..............goodbye.

newballsplease

taxi' are very bad for it.

hittin the town are ya?ya.
busy tonite? yea.
weathers ****e

AHHHH GET ME OUT OF HERE

fitz0

So... hows the weather?... Much happening these days?...

SoupyNorman

newballsplease wrote: »

you know when you meet someone you might have been in school with or havent seen them in a while......that talk when ye say hello, wat r ya up 2 these days...bla bla bla, and then you go on your way again,and dont see that person for another cuple of months/years!. IT CRACKS ME UP.

How do i get out of this? just pretend i dont see the person??

i think its actually impossible to avoid this kind of talk!

Wha, you mean you dont like to Stop and Chat!

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=stop+and+chat


ALSO.....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5f2LJXz-l2k

Irishcrx

Pretty much nearly everything talked about in after hours is either small talk or people giving out about everything...

Naos

Small talk would be a lot more difficult if our weather wasn't as sh1t and unpredictable as it is.

newballsplease

AH that larry David stop and chat one is excellent!!

javaboy

I hate small talk too.

Terry

thelastangryman wrote: »

"**** off"

Infracted.

Seachmall

bravestarr082 wrote: »

Wha, you mean you dont like to Stop and Chat!

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=stop+and+chat

Why can't stop and chats be stop and blows?

stop and blow
-Getting oral sex in a car, and slamming on the brakes, before ejaculating.

or even

-A stop and blow is when you pull off the road or park somewhere to either:

A)Roll up a blunt and continue driving or
B)Straight up park and take a hit.

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Stop%20and%20Blow

yermin

I end up succumbing to the urge to talk some meaningless blather in order to dispel the awkwardness more than I would like, but I try to just do what I feel like, which is rarely small talk. I have had times when I couldn't think of anything to say to someone I haven't seen in ages, and have just looked at them, which if you think about it, isn't that odd a thing to do, just looking at how they may have changed physically. I think I'd learn more than through small talk I can't remember seconds later.

MIN2511

Nothing pisses me off like talking about the weather.... Like ffs look outside

yermin

yeah, wow, you know you're desperate when you're commenting on the weather, unless of course you genuinely are impressed by how nice it's been recently. By the by, it's been steadily pissing for the last few weeks where I live, what a bad summer.

MagicMarker

Terry wrote: »

Infracted.

This will probably get me infracted, but... huh?

Anyhoo, I don't like small talk either, so in an effort to counteract it i do not make any friends and live a life of loneliness. It's fabtastic!

Terry

MagicMarker wrote: »

This will probably get me infracted, but... huh?

Anyhoo, I don't like small talk either, so in an effort to counteract it i do not make any friends and live a life of loneliness. It's fabtastic!

A mistake on my part.
The infraction will be removed.

nyarlothothep

I can see the logic in it, general talk, as it might be difficult to find common topics to talk about, basically the generation of a goodwill feeling between people I think. but meh

MagicMarker

That's too much thinkin' for AH's!

utick

i despise small talk with passion

shenanigans1982

I find it most awkward any time I am getting tattooed. I am sitting there for two hours and wondering do I talk to the guy and risk distracting him or the awkward silences or do I just stay quiet and have him think I am an ignorant f*ck.

Also when it comes to bumping into old school friends I tend to think of something to say thats relevant and more than just small talk instantly after we have continued on our seperate ways.

Epic Tissue

yeah fucking buses are the worst

taidghbaby

when in a situation like this i tend to stick my tongue out and caress my right nipple!!

this normally removes said person from my presence!!

Seachmall

taidghbaby wrote: »

when in a situation like this i tend to stick my tongue out and caress my right nipple!!

this normally removes said person from my presence!!

Have you tried licking their right nipple?

taidghbaby

Seachmall wrote: »

Have you tried licking their right nipple?

i feel compelled to say only youre ma's

masonman

Was looking to start a new thread on small talk but just found this one ( although it s little old)

Anyone interested in having a B1tch about it now?

I've always felt uncomfortable with small talk, its not that I can't do it - for many years I've humored people who start a Small talk conversation with me not knowing any better. But as I'm getting older, I seem to be getting less and less tolerant of situations were small talk is used. It just plain bores me.

I'd be of the opinion that if we have nothing interesting to say don't say anything.


I know some people feel the need to fill the silence. I know you need to be polite, its nice to be nice etc. But Its a social ethiquette where both people know what they are talking about is bullsh1t but both or maybe one ( Usually the initator) feels happier talking about nothing.

I am constantly finding myself in situations at work, family, strangers - were I'm being drawn into these situations were I'm forced to recipricate. Its like an out of body experience ( allow me the dramatics to clarify) where I picture myself looking at myself playing a tape recorded answer to them - zero emotion - yet they buy it

Its getting to the point were, I say the most ridiculously generic things to see if the other person notices but for the most part they don't - Don't get me wrong I always try my very best to be polite and civil.

Its like we are all social zombies.

I know theres nothing I can do to change it, but does anyone have any tips on swaying a small talk situation into something more interesting (While still being civil). I'd be interested (and might be fun) to hear some refreshing ideas.

Zangetsu

Try bringing up another topic that doesn't include the weather or your local named sports team that you heard is going all the way this year...

Take an interest in their lives, what do ya do, hows that working out for ya? I'm a binman, yea its rubbish pay be the hours are great etc etc. Get to know them and the small talk disappears, most people like it...

Snowie

newballsplease wrote: »

you know when you meet someone you might have been in school with or havent seen them in a while......that talk when ye say hello, wat r ya up 2 these days...bla bla bla, and then you go on your way again,and dont see that person for another cuple of months/years!. IT CRACKS ME UP.

How do i get out of this? just pretend i dont see the person??

i think its actually impossible to avoid this kind of talk!

simple allways be visually active and if you see them in the street cross the road

misty floyd

Going to get a hair cut is a nightmare. "any holidays planned?"

I've started going to a barbers in town (Dublin) that have only Polish barbers. Don't have to say anything except "one back and sides" and "thank you".

My friend always asks taxi drivers not to talk to him when he gets in. I'd love to do that but that would make the silences more uncomfortable.

big b

Surely honesty is the best policy

"Sorry, I'm lacking in normal social skills, bye now"

big b

Surely honesty is the best policy

"Sorry, I'm lacking in both patience & social skills, bye now"

Smart Bug

big b wrote: »

Surely honesty is the best policy

"Sorry, I'm lacking in normal social skills, bye now"

Surely it's not:

"Sorry, I'm lacking in normal social skills"

*starts furiously dry-humping their leg*

Sam Vimes

misty floyd wrote: »

Going to get a hair cut is a nightmare. "any holidays planned?"

I've started going to a barbers in town (Dublin) that have only Polish barbers. Don't have to say anything except "one back and sides" and "thank you".

My friend always asks taxi drivers not to talk to him when he gets in. I'd love to do that but that would make the silences more uncomfortable.

If all you're getting is a one back and sides you should buy yourself a shaver and do it yourself. I haven't paid a barber since I was 16

Although I do get the urge to ask myself if I've got any holidays planned.....

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

BroomBurner wrote: »

I hate small talk too, so would just pretend I didn't see them. Though I'm normally not wearing my glasses so the chances are that I saw them but couldn't actually make out their face. Ah, sometimes crappy eyesight is a bonus

I've accidentally blanked a lot of people because of my terrible eye-sight, walked straight past housemates, friends, even family members and never realised they were waiting for me to catch their eye and say hi :P I've also scared a few strangers because when I see them walking towards me I might have to have a peer to see if they're anyone I know. Course, I always forget that not everyone's eyesight is as bad as mine, so while I'm staring at an indistinct blur trying to figure out if it's my cousin,they're faced with some girl walking towards them down the street looking like she's about to kill them.

Abi

Trinity Disgusting Rag wrote: »

I've also scared a few strangers because when I see them walking towards me I might have to have a peer to see if they're anyone I know

Speaking of strangers, people always mistake me for 'someone they know'. It used to a bit amusing, to which I cheekily retort 'oh. So she must be a stunner too' (cheesey I know) but it eases an awkward situation.

Last summer I had a woman pinch my bum, because she thought I was someone she knew 'from behind'.

Now, at this point I was was worn out saying 'dont worry about it' lols all around. So I just said "Well thats worrying". She was mortified etc. But I hate being approached by any one I dont know.

Id rather ignore people than make small talk.

KieranKennedy

I hate those conversations when you can tell that the other person (or even you yourself) are striving to think of something to say just so there is not silence. They ask another stupid boring question, or say something as important as a severed dick on a clothesline. Either way it is a contrived load of bollocks.

dr.bollocko

KieranKennedy wrote: »

I hate those conversations when you can tell that the other person (or even you yourself) are striving to think of something to say just so there is not silence. They ask another stupid boring question, or say something as important as a severed dick on a clothesline. Either way it is a contrived load of bollocks.

A severed dick on my clothesline would be important. It would be noted. At the very least it would be a conversational centrepiece.

kowloon

Abigayle wrote: »

Last summer I had a woman pinch my bum, because she thought I was someone she knew 'from behind'.

I'm so using that as an excuse from now on .

Diabhal Beag

Don't rip on the socially unhappy people. I have to talk to the same feckers everyday who annoy the cum out of me. I hate that one liner "Shocking Weather EH?". TBH I would like to think that I enjoy being on my own more awkward small talk where nothing important or meaningful is said.

/Rant complete.

scruff321

newballsplease wrote: »

you know when you meet someone you might have been in school with or havent seen them in a while......that talk when ye say hello, wat r ya up 2 these days...bla bla bla, and then you go on your way again,and dont see that person for another cuple of months/years!. IT CRACKS ME UP.

How do i get out of this? just pretend i dont see the person??

i think its actually impossible to avoid this kind of talk!

im with you all the way buddy, easy solution just dont stop and chat and that way they think your a rude,ignorant, unfriendly pr/ck, works for me :cool:

nobodythere

newballsplease wrote: »

you know when you meet someone you might have been in school with or havent seen them in a while......that talk when ye say hello, wat r ya up 2 these days...bla bla bla, and then you go on your way again,and dont see that person for another cuple of months/years!. IT CRACKS ME UP.

Holden Caulfield is that you?