Strange Sayings for work meetings

Tony255

So being pretty bored and a lot of meetings ahead, myself and one of the guys working with me have decided to have a competition to see how many strange saying we can drop into meetings. He just managed to drop in "we are now just eating an apple for both sides" and got people to nod along with him. I was in awe so now i need some material that i can drop in and possibly get away with during the meetings.

taidghbaby

recently when talking about the difficult business climate i managed to wrangle in : "pressure's only for tyres" and get away with it!

longshanks

ok autobots, transform and roll out
or, so lets shoot this rhino

if you can work either of those into a conversation i'll buy you a bag of apples. fresh ones too, golden delicious

CountingCrows

"She had a face like a painters radio"

longshanks

CountingCrows wrote: »

"She had a face like a painters radio"

i left her face like a painters radio

Wazdakka

longshanks wrote: »

so lets shoot this rhino

That wouldn't be too hard.

"Alright people its time tighten the noose and kick this pig through the needle"

The man who said this has almost a darren brown type ability..

CountingCrows

longshanks wrote: »

i left her face like a painters radio

What context would you utter that in a meeting?

LouOB

we need bums on seats

helimachoptor

taidghbaby wrote: »

recently when talking about the difficult business climate i managed to wrangle in : "pressure's only for tyres" and get away with it!

I'm sad to say i've used that myself

longshanks

CountingCrows wrote: »

"She had a face like a painters radio"

CountingCrows wrote: »

What context would you utter that in a meeting?

you tell me chief

The_Minister

longshanks wrote: »

if you can work either of those into a conversation i'll buy you a bag of apples. fresh ones too, golden delicious

Anything less than a Granny Smith is an insult.

javaboy

Like buzzword bingo from Dilbert in reverse.

My favourites are from the film 12 Angry Men:

"Let's run this up the flagpole and see if anyone salutes"

and

"Let's send these ideas down the river and see if any of them float"

Captain Darling

This guy i work with alway says 'we got to dial this in,' and it can relate to fcuking anything. By the end of a meeting he has half the fcuking company dialled into something.

Wheres he fcuking ringing?

Mongolia???

longshanks

The_Minister wrote: »

Anything less than a Granny Smith is an insult.

nah granny smiths are shit. golden delicious any day of the week, cox's, red delicious even. just not granny smith.

but back to the meetings, how about 'lets taste this badboy, see if its a granny smith or a golden delish

javaboy

Let's get to the core of this apple? What's the pip of this issue? There's more than one way to skin apple? How do you like them apples?

What's the obsession with apples?

Ron DMC

javaboy wrote: »

What's the obsession with apples?

iPod fanboys.

Kablam

Tie in with (insert name here), and touch base with


Always make me want to round-house kick everyone in the room.

andrew

say 'After all, there's no room for plastic pie (in this project/here)'

BendiBus

You could try stringing a few buzzwords together to form a whole sentence.

e.g. "We need to leverage this paradigm through the goalposts"

faceman

javaboy wrote: »

Like buzzword bingo from Dilbert in reverse.

My favourites are from the film 12 Angry Men:

"Let's run this up the flagpole and see if anyone salutes"

and

"Let's send these ideas down the river and see if any of them float"

DAmn you, i was going to post those. I do for homage sake use the flagpole one. I am a nerd!

I recall another boardsie was in a meeting with his senior management discussing working condition. The boardsie was fighting for better conditions for junior staff to which the disinterested senior manager says:

"In my day we didnt have any of these luxuries"

The boardsie replied:

"well in your day we used to send children up chimneys to clean them but we dont do that anymore"

Cue uncomfortable ruffling of pages!

BaconZombie

How about playing Büllsh1t Bingo.

javaboy

faceman wrote: »

DAmn you, i was going to post those. I do for homage sake use the flagpole one. I am a nerd!

Absolutely brilliant film. Michael Bay could learn a bit about what makes a decent film.

milod

There was a great one from the character 'Gus' in 'Drop the Dead Donkey' a few years ago. When referring to an idea he had just explained to someone, he said:

"So let's park that one in your mental multi-storey..."

To totally confound the meeting, my favourite saying is:

"absolutely guys, let's face it, the more there is, the less the better..."

barbiegirl

Best we ever had was in a sales meeting. The sales manager asked one of the sales guys "how's your pipeline". His response was priceless "nice and regular thanks, I eat Weetabix". I thought I'd have a heart attack. :-)

A_M101

I always mess up phrases in meetings usually be mixing two together.

Besides that I like to see how many times I can get "pseudo" in.

Conor108

You gotta drop in Zapp Brannigan quotes and see if anyone nods!

Example:

"In the game of chess, you can never let your opponent see your pieces"

faceman

javaboy wrote: »

Absolutely brilliant film. Michael Bay could learn a bit about what makes a decent film.

Michael Bay does 12 Angry Men the re-make! :eek:

Just how many explosions and mid riffs shots could he fit into that jury room???

Wurly

Aaaagh, I HATE office buzzwords.

My boss used to say - 'let's head back to the ranch and get a helicopter overview of this'!!!:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

One day in work, we played 'bullsh1t bingo'. We all sat in a meeting and had our bingo board under our agenda's. In each square were sayings like 'team player', 'think outside the box', 'no i in team' etc. When we could line up 5, we stood up and shouted 'BULLSH1t BINGO'. Hillllarious.

Try it, great fun.

And if there's loads of you, you won't get in trouble.

My boss saw the funny side of it anyway.:pac: