the blind man

The Bollox

A blind man walks into a bar and goes up to the counter. he sits down and asks for a drink. the voice that responds is female and he is reminded of a joke he heard a few days before. When he gets his drink he says "thanks, love, I just remembered a great blonde joke from a few days ago, three blondes..." "hold on for a second" the barmaid interjects "before you continue you should know that I am a blonde, to your right is a blonde bodybuilder and to your left is a blonde ban Garda, now do you really want to continue with that joke?"

the old man says "not if I'm going to have to explain it 3 f*cking times!"

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A man is out walking his dog when he meets a friend of his. His friend says "ah, Mick, I haven't seen you this good while, how about a few drinks?". Mick likes the idea but then looks down at his dog and frowns "I can't, Seamus, I have the dog with me, I won't get in anywhere". Seamus says "just tell anyone who asks you to leave that it's your seeing-eye dog, here put on my Ray Bans to complete the look".

So the two men walk off towards their local, Mick wearing the dark sunglasses. When they walk in the Barman stops them and says "no dogs allowed!", but Mick quickly protests "but it's my seeing-eye dog". The barman replies "do you take me for a fool? they don't use chiwawas as seeing eye dogs!" and Mick says

"THEY GAVE ME A CHIWAWA!?"

rocky25

Very Good Mr Bollox Sir, love the doggy one