Should i txt him?

LegacyUser

i meet this guy at the week end at a friends party, really nice guy as in the nicest guy ive ever met. anyway to cut a long story short he dropped me home the next day and asked for my number which i gave him.
i didnt ak for his number in return as i became shy all of a sudden, thing is i can get his number no problem, should i wait for him to txt me or should i get his number and txt him?

Miss Fluff

It's only Monday so wait for him to call you, he will so until then keep busy:)

If he hasn't been in contact by next weekend, procure his number and send him a cheeky text.

Be patient, he will be in touch!

SandraG

Miss Fluff wrote: »

It's only Monday so wait for him to call you, he will so until then keep busy:)

If he hasn't been in contact by next weekend, procure his number and send him a cheeky text.

Be patient, he will be in touch!

I agree! You dont want to come across as too keen and guys love to chase! Give him till next wkend

Jemmy

Agreed hold out til his texts you!

The suspense will kill you but you can do it! :P

Rb

Miss Fluff wrote: »

If he hasn't been in contact by next weekend, procure his number and send him a cheeky text.

Er, no. That would be borderline psychotic. If he hasn't got in touch by next weekend, forget about it. Don't get his number off someone else (as he'll be aware you didn't get it off him) and go texting him when he has shown he has no interest in you.

It'll only hurt your reputation.

LegacyUser

i know i shouldnt it just so difficult lol.
if it was my friend asking my advice id tell her not to txt him.
just havent meet someone like him before
i think he thought that i wasnt that into him, i legged it out of the car and only gave him a very quick kiss on the cheek, also when he asked for my number i think i may have given the impression that i wasnt too bothered!

LegacyUser

i know hes into me, he's kinda shy though, he drove nearly an hr to drop me home even though another friend who lives closer to me offered.

AngryBadger

Text him, none of this waiting around BS, the fact that you got his number from someone else shows interest, waiting for him to text shows disinterest, I realise many people think disinterest is the new black, but really you're just wasting everyone' time.

Text him, get to know him quick and see what happens? if nothing, move onto the next guy, simple

Rb

AngryBadger wrote: »

Text him, get to know him quick and see what happens?

Very nice way to set oneself up to be used for physical means imo.

If he's not interested and therefore does not bother texting/calling you, and you call him, he may well think "Ah, sure there's a quick shag at least" and a month down the line we'll see a thread pop up here along the lines of "Met a guy, got used...feel awful" etc etc.

LegacyUser

i will not let anyone use me, im a pretty straight forward person, if i like someone they'l know, i dont paly games and i dont like someone to play games with me.
if i txt him and he doesnt reply then at least il know

Nevyn

Get his number and ring him and ask him out for coffee.

coco06

sotheysay wrote: »

anyway to cut a long story short he dropped me home the next day and asked for my number which i gave him.

Quick question and i dont want to be too nosey or anything but when you said he dropped you home the next day, was this after ye had sex or what?
From what i get from you i would think ye didnt have sex but just asking.

Your answer will definitly shape what happens next....

Casshern88

Life's too short for "will i wont i" just txt him whats the worst that could be happen im sure hed be thrilled.

LegacyUser

coco donno where your getting that thought from but in answer to your question.....no i didnt sleep with him, he just offered to drop me home because i live a good bit away from where the party was.
lol how does that shape what happens next

coco06

Thought as much.. its just when you said he dropped you home the next day, i just took it up wrong..

As for shaping the way it would have gone next, i think if you had his interst may have been wained...

But you didnt so feck it ring him up and tell him he is buying you a coffee..

Wibbs

SandraG wrote: »

I agree! You dont want to come across as too keen and guys love to chase! Give him till next wkend

Depends on the guy tbh. I like not to waste time and know where I stand, so a text the next day or two would be welcome as far as I was concerned. Maybe it's an age thing.:)

RedXIV

Wibbs wrote: »

Depends on the guy tbh. I like not to waste time and know where I stand, so a text the next day or two would be welcome as far as I was concerned. Maybe it's an age thing.:)

Nope, works at this end of the spectrum too

SnowMonkey

Wibbs wrote: »

Depends on the guy tbh. I like not to waste time and know where I stand, so a text the next day or two would be welcome as far as I was concerned. Maybe it's an age thing.:)

I agree playing the hole wait a few days things anoys me hugly, if you dont receave a text to night , get his number and ring him and ask him to take you out....

Rb

SnowMonkey wrote: »

I agree playing the hole wait a few days things anoys me hugly, if you dont receave a text to night , get his number and ring him and ask him to take you out....

Because that won't freak him out at all.

As I said earlier, if he doesn't text then just take the hint, it's not that hard and at least you can move on with your dignity intact.

BrandonBlock

Rb wrote: »

Because that won't freak him out at all.

As I said earlier, if he doesn't text then just take the hint, it's not that hard and at least you can move on with your dignity intact.

I agree, call me old-fashioned but if a girl I didn't give my number to rang me and asked me on a date I'd run a mile.

SnowMonkey

Rb wrote: »

Because that won't freak him out at all.

As I said earlier, if he doesn't text then just take the hint, it's not that hard and at least you can move on with your dignity intact.

Oh come on..... He wnet to the affort to drive out of his way to drop her home he asked for her number. she gave it. How is that not show Interest in her? the least she can do is thorw the tennis ball back!

Your saying you loose dignity form asking some one out how your doing something nautral to any body?

it should be looked at this way..

At least i had the courage to do it, He dont wanna meet me Oh well plenty ore fish in the sea. which seems to be a fact judging buy the amount of online dateing posts and genrall singleton problems in this day and age :rolleyes:.

Personally i find your comments pretty negitive...

SnowMonkey

BrandonBlock wrote: »

I agree, call me old-fashioned but if a girl I didn't give my number to rang me and asked me on a date I'd run a mile.

why would you run a mile ?

what because she went to the effort of sourcing your number, how is that a reason to run a mile ???
Or are you one of these people who run a mile if a girl ask's you out in genrall?

Rb

SnowMonkey wrote: »

Oh come on..... He wnet to the affort to drive out of his way to drop her home he asked for her number. she gave it. How is that not show Interest in her? the least she can do is thorw the tennis ball back!

So...? A lift pretty much means nothing. Just because he asked for her number, does not mean he automatically intended on using it, please see all the threads on here about people who've swapped numbers with people they've met on nights out and the like and have never heard from them again. In this day and age, it's pretty meaningless and is somewhat of a courteous formality.

SnowMonkey wrote:

Your saying you loose dignity form asking some one out how your doing something nautral to any body?

Er, what?

SnowMonkey wrote:

it should be looked at this way..

At least i had the courage to do it, He dont wanna meet me Oh well plenty ore fish in the sea. which seems to be a fact judging buy the amount of online dateing posts and genrall singleton problems in this day and age :rolleyes:.

Or how about looking at it in a really, really realistic way. He enjoyed the night with her, dropped her home and took her number (actually not taking her number at that point would have been fairly offensive really).

He has her number and was brave enough to offer a lift home and whatever else happened that night, therefore if he's interested in her he'll use the number he has.

If he's not interested, he won't call/text. Then, if she goes ahead and actually seeks his number out from someone else, and then texts him, in his mind she just won't have gotten the hint. It also shows...umm..somewhat desperation. Plenty of women already have awful reputations for bunny boiling and the like and this kind of reasoning is exactly what leads to it.

If he has no interest in her and gets a text from her, when he knows she didn't have his number in the first place, he'll realise she actively sought out his number after he didn't bother texting/calling and tracked him down.

It's ridiculous! He has her number, just leave him be and see what the fecking result is! Don't go chasing him down and seeking his info like some weird stalker.

SnowMonkey wrote:

Personally i find your comments pretty negitive...

I'd deem them "realistic" and sorry if you're not aware of this already, but not everything in life is "positive". Sometimes the truth hurts but it is better for a person than outright lying to them or getting their hopes up. That's life.

SnowMonkey

Rb wrote: »

So...? A lift pretty much means nothing. Just because he asked for her number, does not mean he automatically intended on using it, please see all the threads on here about people who've swapped numbers with people they've met on nights out and the like and have never heard from them again. In this day and age, it's pretty meaningless and is somewhat of a courteous formality.

I think we've all been in that situation!!!
Ok so what your saying is he was curteously driving out of his way for a
girl he meet the night before??

Rb wrote: »

Or how about looking at it in a really, really realistic way. He enjoyed the night with her, dropped her home and took her number (actually not taking her number at that point would have been fairly offensive really).

realistic or just trying to be a realist. From being in a similer situation my self i can 80% predict he did that to show interest,. What blokes going to drive out of his way for some girl he meet at a party or for some girl ?
I wouldnt why what would be the point ?

Rb wrote: »

He has her number and was brave enough to offer a lift home and whatever else happened that night, therefore if he's interested in her he'll use the number he has.

Have you said that allready ?

Rb wrote: »

If he's not interested, he won't call/text. Then, if she goes ahead and actually seeks his number out from someone else, and then texts him, in his mind she just won't have gotten the hint. It also shows...umm..somewhat desperation. Plenty of women already have awful reputations for bunny boiling and the like and this kind of reasoning is exactly what leads to it.

Yes granted very true but if she striaght to the point in the first text explains why she's gone to the trouble of getting her number she wont seem like a bunny boiler. Beside's a person going to look like a bunny boiler from one text? is that what your saying?

Rb wrote: »

If he has no interest in her and gets a text from her, when he knows she didn't have his number in the first place, he'll realise she actively sought out his number after he didn't bother texting/calling and tracked him down.

If that pretty BIG IF.... chances are he does and im sorry if im not being realistic in your eyes, But thast something called risk something that people should be taking not going ohh if i dont do it then i well i might look like a bunny boiler or something

Rb wrote: »

It's ridiculous! He has her number, just leave him be and see what the fecking result is! Don't go chasing him down and seeking his info like some weird stalker.

It is ? how is seeking some ones number Stalking ? please enlightin me to how you can justfy saying that becasue im really interested to know ? So does that mean im a stalker when i look at a woman in a night club twice?

Rb wrote: »

I'd deem them "realistic" and sorry if you're not aware of this already, but not everything in life is "positive". Sometimes the truth hurts but it is better for a person than outright lying to them or getting their hopes up. That's life.

Well deam your " relistic" ways all you want mate that what forums are for.
Bye the way Im not attacking you im dissagreing wiht you...

STUBBORNGIRL

Thaedydal wrote: »

Get his number and ring him and ask him out for coffee.

Definitely do not just text him - This is a horrible means of communication and always ends in misunderstandings - believe me i have been there! GEt the guts and ring him - thank him for the lift and ask him if you can repay him by bringing him out for a meal or something along those lines!! Its very hard for him to refuse you after you have went to the trouble of ringing him! plus it shows interest and you have indicated that this guy is shy so go for it!!

i hate GAme playing and this waiting around for 3 days to not look so keen is utter BS!!!! why cant things just be straight forward! ??? I dont know!

Anyway best of luck

STUBBORNGIRL

Nothing ventured nothing gained.

I met a guy before and we didnt swap numbers so i got his number from a mutual friend and he didnt text me back but i would have been forever wondering!

you have nothing to lose but as i said Ring rather than text.

tobiesheba

There's definitely no harm in contacting him to thank him for the lift and to have a chat. If you really think he was like no other you've met you'd be foolish not to contact him just because he's the guy and you're waiting for him to call.

And anyway it's only manners to thank him for bringing you home and I think some guys would be flattered that you went to the trouble of asking someone else for their number.

sunnyside

STUBBORNGIRL wrote: »

Its very hard for him to refuse you after you have went to the trouble of ringing him!

I went on a date with someone once for that very reason, I found it impossible to say no even though I had no interest in going on the date. I was just being polite which is a terrible reason to be going out with someone.

OP did he call you? I hope he did.

SarahSassy

If he wants to see you again he will be in touch... Trust me I have been around the block a few times and if they like you they call. If they dont really care they tend not to bother...

I would not contact him.. He knows where to find you if he wants to.

OrangeDaisy

Seriously it's only monday!!! If he hasn't texted you by the weekend then start thinking about whether you can get his number it's way too early, he'll be totally freaked out if you get his number and text him this early imo you're entering stalker territory!!

SnowMonkey

OrangeDaisy wrote: »

Seriously it's only monday!!! If he hasn't texted you by the weekend then start thinking about whether you can get his number it's way too early, he'll be totally freaked out if you get his number and text him this early imo you're entering stalker territory!!

how is that stalker territory ?

nocal

Now I think that there is a very simple solution to this - ask for his number off someone who would check with him first if it is ok for them to give you his number. At least that way you are expressing an interest and he will learn of it.

And I would look for the number during the week - but not on Monday.

That is my 2 cent worth.

OrangeDaisy

if he's wanted her to have his number he would've given it to her so her getting the number from other people would look bad.....

tman

OrangeDaisy wrote: »

Seriously it's only monday!!! If he hasn't texted you by the weekend then start thinking about whether you can get his number it's way too early, he'll be totally freaked out if you get his number and text him this early imo you're entering stalker territory!!

Yep, just take a chill pill and leave it until next week at the earliest before you try to get his number (and even then it might be a bad idea!)
If he likes you, he'll contact you. If not, you've just got to move on...

SnowMonkey

OrangeDaisy wrote: »

if he's wanted her to have his number he would've given it to her so her getting the number from other people would look bad.....

he asked her for the number useually tthe girl says whast yours ....

how would it look bad it look like shes interested in him how is that bad ?

I swear to god no wonder so many young women are single its a showing here plain that if you ask a person to get someones number and your seen as a stalker

amazeing.....

Nevyn

Yup but if a guy went to the bother of getting thier number and got in touch with them then it's flattering but not the other way around, what rubbish.

OrangeDaisy

SnowMonkey wrote: »

he asked her for the number useually tthe girl says whast yours ....

well this girl didn't and he didn't offer it either!!

SnowMonkey wrote: »

how would it look bad it look like shes interested in him how is that bad ?

all she needs is a bit of patience....i bet while she's on here obsessing about him texting her , he's at home trying to compose the perfect text

SnowMonkey wrote: »

I swear to god no wonder so many young women are single its a showing here plain that if you ask a person to get someones number and your seen as a stalker

amazeing.....

it's up to the individual of course and i did say that was in my opinion

Nathan251

what i don't understand is why the OP didn't give any signals that she liked the guy, rushing out of the taxi, kissing on the cheek, not bothered about the number...now the guy probably thinks she is not interested and won't risk further embarrasment, why for the life of me you treated the guy like this when you claim to like him is beyond me!

LegacyUser

SarahSassy wrote: »

If he wants to see you again he will be in touch... Trust me I have been around the block a few times and if they like you they call. If they dont really care they tend not to bother...

I would not contact him.. He knows where to find you if he wants to.

Unfortunatley this is my experience as well.

If he has your number and he likes you, he will contact you. That doesn't mean that you cannot or should not contact him. You could get his number and thank him for the lift. Therefore you are putting the 'Tennis Ball' back in his court.

However there is a good quote from the book 'Hes just not that into you' written by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo where the guy shows his point of view by saying: "Sometimes I call people from my pants pocket when I don't even mean to. If I were into you, you would be the bright spot in my horribly busy day. Which would be a day that I would never be too busy to call you."

Let us know if he contacts you..... I love happy endings!

SnowMonkey

OrangeDaisy wrote: »

well this girl didn't and he didn't offer it either!!

because she got shy awwwwwwwwwwwwww how adorable...

OrangeDaisy wrote: »

all she needs is a bit of patience....i bet while she's on here obsessing about him texting her , he's at home trying to compose the perfect text

I i just useually go hey how are you ite insername here ...


i

OrangeDaisy wrote: »

it's up to the individual of course and i did say that was in my opinion

I know but its stinks :D

sunnyside

SnowMonkey wrote: »

he asked her for the number useually tthe girl says whast yours ....

I swear to god no wonder so many young women are single its a showing here plain that if you ask a person to get someones number and your seen as a stalker

amazeing.....

Whenever I give someone my number I NEVER ask for theirs in return. Assumption that when they call or text I'll have their number then.

I would prefer if the man gave me his number himself, that way I'd be certain he wanted me to have it.

Ticktacktoetwo wrote: »

If I were into you, you would be the bright spot in my horribly busy day. Which would be a day that I would never be too busy to call you."

!

That's so truue, nobody is ever too busy for the people they really love.

LegacyUser

hey everone thanks for all your advice.....
and guess what he called me last night and we're going for dinner on sat!

however i will make the point that if he didnt call me i would have called him, i still dont see anything wrong with the girl doing that, i wouldnt have done it if i wasnt sure, but i knew he liked me.

the reason i acted off with him when he dropped me off was that i got shy all of a sudden, i really liked this guy and i just though "oh ****" doesnt make sense i know but then again i never seem to come across guys like him.

and seriously some people on this are very negitive, honestly he went to the bother of dropping me home which is roughly 45 miles away from where the party was, he was extremly tired but insisted that he drop me home even though one of my friends offered to. if i didnt read into that, id consider myself slightly dumb
anyway thansk everyone

boarddotie

sotheysay wrote: »

hey everone thanks for all your advice.....
and guess what he called me last night and we're going for dinner on sat!

Ah thats great news! We were all rooting for u

Aurora Borealis

That's brilliant. Hope the date goes well for ye.

AngryBadger

Rb wrote: »

Very nice way to set oneself up to be used for physical means imo.

If he's not interested and therefore does not bother texting/calling you, and you call him, he may well think "Ah, sure there's a quick shag at least" and a month down the line we'll see a thread pop up here along the lines of "Met a guy, got used...feel awful" etc etc.

How does sending someone a text set you up to be used for sex?

Being an immature twat sets you up to be used for sex, sending a text just sets you up to maybe receive a reply...or not.

What's with the proxy-responsibility control people are suddenly giving to inanimate means of communication? Saying "hi" or sending a text is not an automatic pretext for the short but filthily satisfying terminus of being used for sex. I wish I could say this was a new one.....

Zillah

SandraG wrote: »

guys love to chase!

:rolleyes: Try behaving like an adult some time.

SnowMonkey

sotheysay wrote: »

hey everone thanks for all your advice.....
and guess what he called me last night and we're going for dinner on sat!

however i will make the point that if he didnt call me i would have called him, i still dont see anything wrong with the girl doing that, i wouldnt have done it if i wasnt sure, but i knew he liked me.

the reason i acted off with him when he dropped me off was that i got shy all of a sudden, i really liked this guy and i just though "oh ****" doesnt make sense i know but then again i never seem to come across guys like him.

and seriously some people on this are very negitive, honestly he went to the bother of dropping me home which is roughly 45 miles away from where the party was, he was extremly tired but insisted that he drop me home even though one of my friends offered to. if i didnt read into that, id consider myself slightly dumb
anyway thansk everyone

:cool: congrats....:cool:

claiva

hope it works out for ya !!!!

By the way....some guys are very shy and I for one would be impressed and flattered if you sought my number and texted or rang me during the week.
It sounds like you were a little off with him when you left so I would not have been surprised if he didn't ring you. I'm glad he did though.....
Oh...young love eh !!!!!:D:D:D

anonymous_joe

Hurrah. ^^

Good luck.

LegacyUser

hey guys

thanks a mill for all your good luck wishes, hopefully he's ask me to marry him and then we'l buy a castle.......ah come on its every girls dream

caliva i agree i would be totally flattered if someone sought my number regardless if i liked them or not, the problem ocurs when you keep getting in contact with them even though its obvious that their not into you.

i was 99.9% positive that he was into me otherwise i wouldnt have even thought about it