Housemate Issue

LegacyUser

Hi Folks,

Going unreg for this. Having a bit of an issue with my housemate and I'm not sure how to bring it up because I genuinely do like her - she's been sharing the house for the past two years and will be for at least one more - and I don't want to make things awkward or upset/annoy her. Anyway, the thing is that she incredibly, incredibly loud - she just has no indoor voice. I can actually deal with it most of the time because I'm in college or otherwise out of the house for large parts of the day and there are other housemates around creating general background noise, but as it's the summer the other housemates are away and I'm at home because I'm working on my thesis. Anyway, I know it doesn't seem like a huge thing but she blares the telly, laughs very loudly at the telly, is on the phone a lot being loud and recently her boyfriend has started staying over a lot so there's constant talking late into the night. I'm a night owl and I wouldn't normally mind noise, but it's just this constant loud voice, it's actually sending me insane.

Any idea how to approach it? I've tried the "Wow I was watching a DVD last night, I hope it didn't keep you up, these walls are paper thin" but the hint failed.

RedXIV

Ask her for quiet time while your working on your thesis. Just mention the fact you'd like her to tone it down while you work on it, then every time she's overly loud, say your going to work on your thesis and hopefully it'll have the desired effect. If she's a mate, this shouldn't be that big an issue

jellie

if you both get on well with each other im sure shed have no problem trying to be a bit quieter while youre working on your thesis. maybe just have a word with her? shes probably not even aware shes making the noise. id be mortified if i was keeping someone from getting work done.

Fajitas!

I had this for a year... Except it was the three of the housemates.

Tbh, I moved out in the end, but I found it very difficult to get across that walls are quite thin, the TV does go quite loud, and heels and wooden floors don't go well together. Never mind the talking...

I don't know how she'd react, but try just into the living room/wherever at night, and saying "is there any chance you can keep it down, I'm up early again in the morning with a rake of work to do", bonus points if the boyfriend is there, he realise that she's being loud too...

Best of luck.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

How open is she? She may not even know it's a problem...

Sitting down and talking might work.

hussey

If you don't tell her straight, then she won't know.
When she blares the TV just ask her to turn it down, as you are studying and you can hear it in your room, in simple friendly terms.

No point hinting, just be direct.

Glowing

Is she a teacher? I've always found that teachers speak really loudly in general!

Mr Benevolent

Stating the obvious, but might she have a hearing problem?

Nuggles

Just say it out. Say it's not normally a problem but with your thesis would she mind turning down her volume a bit. Emphasise how much you'd appreciate it too.

LegacyUser

thanks folks. I tried saying it to her earlier on and to be fair she turned down the tv but I'm still not getting anything done cos of the talking. How can you tell someone that they have a really loud, annoying voice? Even so, the daytime is not so bad because it's fairly quiet when her boyfriend isn't over (it's just he doesn't work Mondays) but they would drive you mental at night I suppose you can't really ask them not to talk in bed. Her room is in between mine and another housemate's and before the other housemate left for the summer she said she was having noise issues and had mentioned it so I do know it's not just me - but also I don't want to be the second person to bring this up and make a huge issue. Is there any way of saying "You have a very loud voice and you basically shout without realising" without saying exactly that?

marti101

No you have to be outstraight either that just go to the library at least you will get a bit of peace.

scatriona

I shared with mates and they used to slag me for how noisy I was - especially my footfall on the stairs bizarrely! I never took it to heart but I did make an effort to tone it down. Say it out straight, even jokingly, and if she's a mate she'll cop on as it's hard to find good/decent flatmates and if you've been living together for 2 yrs already, you obv. get on OK...

S

drusk

Which is more important? Her being a little put out, or you handing in a crap thesis?

As far as I can see, you have three options:

1. Tell her she's being unintentionally loud, and you'd like her to stop.
2. Stop being a night owl and get into the library early and spend the day there.
3. Buy some earplugs.

Personally, I would go with the third option. I always wore earplugs when studying in my final year of college. The really worked a treat.

Best of luck with it!

Suaimhneach

Headphones.

Mention you need quiet to concentrate.

Please and thanks.

drusk

Jesjes wrote: »

Headphones.

Think the problem is housemate's loud voice more than anything else. Can't see how headphones would help?

Suaimhneach

Drown out the noise of her loud voice... simple really.

Overheal

drusk wrote: »

Can't see how headphones would help?

Seriously?

I use headphones often when i hear bumps (and squeaks and moans and Hey Coheed and Cambria I Like This Song(!)) in the night or distracting voices from the next room. If theyre up to it late into the night though why not just go down and say something "can you turn that down please?" go back to bed. end of. In all reality though you have to expect people to live their lives to a reasonable extent and if you need the dead silence, then to the library with you.