tough times !!!!

railbird

hey all ,

basically need to get a few things out off my chest whinge and give out about !!

going threw a few really stressful months ,

where to start, met up with a girl i fancied /had my eye for a while ,after coming home from a 3 month vacation to usa last year so we hooked up but she was after beginging her 1st year of college , i always said to myself i would never be with a college girl (insecurities of long distance relationship / weekend boyfriend ) with me being in work all weekend it made it tough !! but i was in love etc so i stuck it out , we went threw a few patches 1 semi break for like 1 week , but got it back on track , with promises of a summer together with each other ie actually spending quality time together so, we stuck it out with the ideal summer in our minds !!

she then gets the idea in her head of spending the summer with girlfriends in europe , smashing our summer plans of time together , which basically puts my conifdence in the relationship at a all time low , i decide that we cannot be together then after this , threw a couple of heated arguements we reviel that she had been with a guy in college while we were together , which shattered me tbh !! the lack of quality time leading up to this made us drift apart , which i feel made it a little easier , so she went away and we didnt talk for 2 months !!

while we were in this break up a was approached by a girl in my work , a very attractive girl , whom i had been very curious about in our few last weeks together ,(may iadd i have never cheated or anything like that before ever)
so managed to get together with this girl , who was on a workin holiday in ireland i knew she woud be going home eventually but never took any thing aboutthat into consideration ,

so we went ona date , yeah i know it was fast moving on but call it rebound or life tilt i dont know , it was amazing we got on so well !! it felt great she made me feelrealy really good about my self !!

so we progress over the next few weeks meeting up regulary , getting on so well , damn im falling for this girl !! still dosent register were getting on too well !!

so there is one weekend she was away , and i get some alone time ,im pretty deep but mos tof the time i dont get into it !!

i miss her alot over the weekend , and begin tothink about , shes going home in 5 weeks , to be honest i was falling totally falling for this girl we spent somuch amazing time together and nowim thinking crap im not going to have this in 5 weeks !!

i have to try distance my self but find it very hard !! and also couldnt tell this girl that im falling in love with her !!

so i find myself acting strange around this girl now because were not going to be together , its not me and i dont like it !

on the work front im being kept on the grounds that i do a course to reactivate my qualifacation which allows me to work my job , so i begin the course on friday and saturday its due to be on sunday and the same next weekend !!

3 months ago i was in hospital with stomach pains , on the saturday night i get the identical pains possibly worse !! i get rushed to hospital the next morning the doc is tell me im lucky i got in,my appendix had burst it was removed sunday morning !! what a sucky turn of events !!!

i cannot complete my couse due to being hospital bound for a week !! and am effectivly out of a job , plus the girl ive falen in love with is going home in 2 weeks !! im stuck indoors for another week she visits me etc but we cant do our normal things that we enjoyed doing (no not what yer all thinking of but yes that too )

to top it all off i a recreational bodybuider !! being stuck in bed loosing your apatite and my poor genitics , this is a disaster waiting to happen , basically when i dont stick to my diet and dont train , i loose alot of weight !! so far im down a stone and a half !! baically 2years down the drain !! this really gets to me !! any 1 wholives thislifestyle understands !! so much time and effort goes into it !!

minor depression has set in i feel at this stage !! loosing weight , job and girlfriend !! all in the space of 3 weeks !!

it has all really got me down !!

im 22 and dont know where life is taking me right now !!

i find im not the best person to be around when i like this !!

i still am notoffically alowed to do any activity not for another 3- 4 weeks until fully healed !!

this sucks !!

MagicMarker

Dude, you can take out all the info about the girls and just leave in the fact that you're stuck in a hospital bed and it still would be understandable why you're feeling this way.

It sucks that this has all krept up on you all of a sudden...

The only advice i can offer is that when you're out of hospital, DON'T go getting yourself into another relationship.. Focus on you, focus on your bodybuilding and enjoy the single life.

Going by what you've written, it appears that you fall for girls way to easily and it comes across as unhealthy. So yeah, enjoy some alone time, keep things casual and enjoy life.

You'll get over this girl in no time...

As for the job, better than death eh?

BloodSugarSex

jus go drink some harp and evrythin wil be ok

Beruthiel

BloodSugarSex wrote: »

jus go drink some harp and evrythin wil be ok

Read this forums charter before you get yourself banned from here.
B

BloodSugarSex

Beruthiel wrote: »

Read this forums charter before you get yourself banned from here.
B

same goes for you, chill out ya mod wannabe

Wagon

Jesus man, that's a seriously ****ty turn of events for you. I'd absolutely agree with Magic Marker and say be single for a while and take time away from the birds. You'll get over this grild faster than you might imagine.
You're very lucky that your a bodybuilder as it is an excellent way to clear your head and keep your mind away from things. Just do anything you can think of to tolerate the next 4 weeks or so. Also keep in mind that these normally ****ty events like this are quiter rare and are followed by good times. Good luck man.

For the record, Harp is piss.

Wibbs

BloodSugarSex banned for obvious reasons.

LouOB

Sounds like the universe is giving you a 'chill out' card
Take it

railbird

well unfortunatly idont drink !!

sorry if it wasnt clear im home from hospital now , have 4 more weeks or so with minimal activity ,

basically no motvation or drive at the minute !!

yes i more than likely fall to easy for women , maybe it was just these two girls , i have seen my ex since it felt strange but there was definity no feelings there , which made me feel a little better nowing it wasnt going to be awkward !!

other girl is gone home now , meh what can i do , i was sayin to my friends that i need i bit of me time !!

i suppose its a ittle harder to enjoy the single life when you dont drink , but thats my choice i prefere it !!!


i suppose its just the uncertanty of what lies ahead for me !!

tobiesheba

Do ya think the second girl felt the same way about you? Because I always think if something's meant to be there are ways of getting around distance and separation.

Would you consider moving to be with her? You say you've lost your job so that's not holding you and I don't know anything about body building but I expect you can do it most places.

Maybe if she felt as strongly as you she'd consider coming back to Ireland again.

If not notch it up to a good experience and imagine if you felt so deeply about her how amazing it will be when you meet someone who reciprocates your feelings.

railbird

if it were all that easy !!!!

she's from france her english is good , but ive no french !! bills etc here holding me back , shes attending college when now that shes back !!

but like i said in prevous post , i need alone time / time with friends !!!

i was in a serious 3 year relationship before these two that was very stressfull too , there was a year gap in between the 1st and second relationship !!

alot happened in this relationship too , ie issues with her and my mother , plus aot more !!

ha its like some dr phil stuff !!

Mr. Incognito

Ah look- stressing over one thing usually snowballs and everything seems like a mountain but break it down.

1. Your ex, while it affected your confidence you know now that she wasn't the end all of the world, cheating on you exagerattes that. You're probably not quite over her yet- but time will do that for you.

2. Current squeeze- is a rebound, the reason you are so infactuated with her is the simple fact she ISN'T you ex and I know you find yourself comparing and contrasting them and this can make people look great because before you examine who they are you've already decided what they aren't and it can be rose tinted. Just enjoy her company and see what happens and don't be stressing over distance- it's faster to fly to france than to get a train to galway so distance there is nothing.

3. Your health, well, you're sick. That's life mate. you'll be sick again. now- it won't take you two years to get back into shape- I know how much effort it takes but the body bounces back fast- you'l see when you're back on your feet. Some things in life are beyond our control and it's the measure of a person that when they face adversity they don't piss and moan but get on with the job in hand.

Take each thing seperately, and take some time out. You're young, there's plenty of time for anything and everything you want from life.

railbird

i know its a suck it up pussy suitation !!

i know there a millions upon millions of people in worse suitations than me !!

ill jus take this chance to chill out get my head together !!

just needed to get it off my chest !!

Maddison

Hi Railbird,

I defo agree that you need to chill & take some ''me time''. Relationships are tough & I think that at 22 you should be out enjoying yourself rather than worrying about relationships, you have plenty of time for this. Have you ever thought about taking time out & travelling & seeing the world. I became a mum at a young age & these are things that I would have loved to do & would advise any young people to do before settling down. As for the bodybuilding, my dad & brother are both bodybuilders & I know the work that goes into it but until you have built yourself back up to full health I would just relax then get back into it, It will take time but you will be back to being buff dont worry.
Best of luck & happy singledom....enjoy it!!

NOGMaxpower

Hi Railbird,

I gota agree with Madison!

Spend the next 4 weeks of rehab reseraching a trip to Australia for yaer.

I was in a similar situation as you, health issues, long term breakup wrecking my head, rebounds the works.

Its not what happend that got me down but like it it was the what happens next syndrome. When you can't see a future its a very dark place to be in.

I took a year out travelled and believe me it was the best thing I ever did. I've never EVER felt that bad in my life since and infact I can confidently say I am a better person for it.

You're 22, do it, you'd be crazy not too. Life catches up with you pretty quick and before you know it you'll be married have kids and a 9-5 to suck the life out of you!

Carpe Diem
Maxi

railbird

if only i could !!

i travelled last year spent the summer in chicago!! best ever i was just single at that stage and needed a break from life best thing i ever did !!

if i had any financial backup id be gone !!

back bills etc are holding me back !!

10k debt from 2 cars and 4 holidays inc last year is holding me back !!