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What can i do?

  • 07-07-2008 2:28pm
    #1
    Hooly22
    Closed Accounts Posts: 179 ✭✭


    A while ago I put up a post (was anon) though about being worried about a friend who has lost alot of weight.

    Skip on a a week or so, and I finally asked her about it.
    I've now found out that yes, she has an eating disorder.

    I'm not trying to steal attention from her so forgive me if it sounds like I'm trying to do that.

    I'm just gutted that this has happened to her. I've seen the damage it can do to a persons life(from my mum), and how hard it is to properly recover, and how it can keep coming back.

    I don't know how to act, but I'm trying my hardest to act the same. I just feel like I'm losing my best friend.


Comments

  • #2
    Marksie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,395 ✭✭✭Marksie


    Hooly22 wrote: »
    I just feel like I'm losing my best friend.

    How would you act around a best friend who needs support?

    Ask yourself how you would want to be treated in the same situation


  • #3
    RedXIV
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,516 ✭✭✭RedXIV


    Hooly22 wrote: »
    I don't know how to act, but I'm trying my hardest to act the same. I just feel like I'm losing my best friend.

    Whats hard here? you recognise you have a friend with a problem, if they've confided in you then they probably trust you alot. This is the time when you PROVE yourself as a good friend and support them.

    You act supportive but don't try to keep reminding them about it. In general i find forget about it until they want to talk about it.


  • #4
    Hooly22
    Closed Accounts Posts: 179 ✭✭Hooly22


    Of course I'm gonna support her. Just this one topic I myself have issues talking about. I can't handle talking about food issues. I never could. But if she wants to, I want to be able to if that makes sense.

    I'm just scared for her. I'm worried about her. I want to take it away from her


  • #5
    RedXIV
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,516 ✭✭✭RedXIV


    If you could do that, you'd be a very popular person, but lets face it, you can't. You can't wave a wand and cure this, BUT your friendship and support can strongly contribute to her recovery.

    Plenty of people have to talk about things they don't like sometimes and while it may distress you to discuss them, think about the good you are doing instead.


  • #6
    Redpunto
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,024 ✭✭✭Redpunto


    And what advice exactly are you looking for?


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  • #7
    Marksie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,395 ✭✭✭Marksie


    Hooly22 wrote: »
    Of course I'm gonna support her. Just this one topic I myself have issues talking about. I can't handle talking about food issues. I never could. But if she wants to, I want to be able to if that makes sense.
    There is a certain issue i am uncomfortable with. In that instance you just have to accept and let it pass through. Listening is every much as helpful as doing.


  • #8
    AngryBadger
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,251 ✭✭✭AngryBadger


    OP all you can do for your friend is be her friend as per usual.

    Whatever's going on in her head is something she's going to have to come to terms with on her own terms. If you start acting differently around her, whether it's because of your food "issues" or whatever, all you're going to do is drive her further into herself.

    Whether she actually opens up or not, whether she talks to you about her problems or not, the single best thing you can do is be her friend as if nothing was any different.

    If you start wigging out because she has problems then you're no good to her. All you'll succeed in doing is making her feel isolated.

    Honestly, I ahve to ask what your real problem is here? In order to help your friend, just be her friend. If you have food "issues" then avoid that topic/practice around her.


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