Funny words you come across in work

sham08

Hi

If this tread goes a bit rude etc mods please close it down.

Probably the most immature tread ever but anyway :rolleyes:

If you take a light hearted view of your job, is there any terms/ expressions or whatever used regularly during the course of your job, that make you snigger to yourself every now and again.

I work in a steel company and every day we use terms like

Stiffener
Flange
Member
Butt

and a few others which are innocent terms but might sound a bit rude

anyway just wondering were there others in different companies

Hail 2 Da Chimp

heh heh 'stiffener'!

chopperbyrne

I work with someone whose surname is Kock.

chin_grin

Stiffener
Flange
Member
Butt

Ok I cannot take it any more.........what is it that you do!?

Suppose I have "period ends" is that funny? I don't really know.

I work with someone whose surname is Kock

F*ck! How do you keep a straight face? *snigger*

Pighead

Cum shot, penis, vagina, money shot.

There's loads of them in Pornstar Pigheads line of work.

chin_grin

Ah c'mon! I'm sure there are more colourful names than those. Give us the inside scoop. (no metaphor-pun intended).

ejmaztec

Used to audit a company that manufactured abrasive balls for cleaning out pipes. It was balls this, balls that, endless phonecalls from customers looking for their balls. It was all balls, all day long. They couldn't understand why I sat there all day sniggering.:)

lazernuts

Not in work, but was in Lidl yesterday, and came across a 'Water Butt Pump" they were selling.

chin_grin

Which reminds me, a company we have to ring is Weener Plastics Packaging Group.....COME ON! (if you google them they do the little balls for roll on deodorants among other things....http://www.weenerplastic.com/index.php?id=&sub=&sub2=&menu=&lang=en).

John Mason

Decommitial !!!!!!!!!!!!

digitally-yours

chin_grin wrote: »

Ok I cannot take it any more.........what is it that you do!?

Suppose I have "period ends" is that funny? I don't really know.

F*ck! How do you keep a straight face? *snigger*

"period ends" same here

do you work in accounts ?

"interim period":o

brundlefly

i know a family called sexx...bad enough on its own but the parents had the incredible lack of foresight to call their daughter orla....poor girl never gets a minutes peace.

chopperbyrne

I know a guy whose name is Richard William Cox.

Not too bad until you realise that it could be shortened to Dick Willy Cox!

Sherifu

Insider Trading.

My mate met this woman in work before called 'Poon Tsang'.

Tar.Aldarion

Fluffer.

Run_to_da_hills

If you ever get a new recruit at work send him up to the reception and ask can he look for Mike Hunt.

Wazdakka

There are sooo mant TLA's in what i do it isnt funny...

Three Letter Acronym's

The best funny word type thing I can think of is telling the customer that they are suffering from an ID-10-T Error...

sham08

chin_grin wrote: »

Ah c'mon! I'm sure there are more colourful names than those. Give us the inside scoop. (no metaphor-pun intended).

Full penetration butt welds

My boss actually said to me when describing something to me 'try to visualise me holding a member and trying to stop it twisting'

and 'I definately think you need a flange stiffener'

Ah the joys of immaturity :pac:

fitz0

The name Willie Magee on a form

FarmerGreen

We used to get visited by a rep from
Wayne-Kerr Instruments.

AckwelFoley

Smegma is a funny word in my office. Its my one man office

Joe Cool

I've never done that in the office at all.
Why would anyone do it across funny words?


:cool:


(Yeah, I know, same joke in two threads, Sorry)

scudster

Heres a few names in the office;
Bernd Hass,
Phil Magee.

Other words mentioned;
Flange bearing,
grease nipple,
box insert.

And as i'm from a farming background how about the implement called a Cock-Lifter!

Wishbone Ash

brundlefly wrote: »

i know a family called sexx...

Wasn't there a Kildare inter-county player called Bill Sex?

There used to be jokes about him dribbling before he shoots.

Wishbone Ash

My memory was not deceiving me!

UCD was awash with a host of brilliant intercounty players from the four corners of Ireland . UCD also instituted the all Ireland sevens competition , which was the first sponsored GAA event . UCD defeated Nemo Rangers of cork on a Scoreline of 1-11 to 0-12 in the 1975 final. the line out was I.HEFFERNAN,M.JUDGE,G.O,REILLY,C.MOYNIHAN,P.J O HALLORAN,E and F O Donoghue, THE GENTLE M.CARTY,P.,ONEILL,B.DUNLEAVY,J.P KEANE,J.and B.WALSH,P. DUGGAN,B.HENEGHAN.
In 1985 After a gap of six years the Sigerson returned to Belfield when the team captained by Bill Sex of Kildare . The winning team was -S.Maguire,JJjmc Kearney,SmcGovern,So.Neill,P.Smith,N McCaffrey,A.Healy,W.SEX,MoDonoghue,S.Ryan,,D.flanagan,J.Lyons,M .Lynam, N.Clancy,P.mcNamee and S.Rodgers. Overtime UCD has been fortunate to have the services of Graduate officials such as DR.JJ. Stuart ( Uachtharan C.L.G 1958), Paddy Mc Donald , Brendan Devlin, Gerry Dineen , Eugene Mc Gee ,Cathal Young , Sean Murray,Adrian Wynne and Seamus Conaty amongst others to supplement the vibrant enthusiasm of student members.UCD won the Sigerson in 1996 after a lapse of 11 years. the team was captained by Facthna Collins and managed by John Reilly,Tommy Sullivan and Seamus Rodgers.

Oral Slang

I used to have to use the tannoy system in my old job & regularly had to ask for the Cuir (pronounced queer) Engineer to contact reception, which I used to find quite funny!

taidghbaby

company i work for sounds like laytex.....when i tell people the always assume im selling condoms!!

We used to call these "honymoon pliers"

When you squeezed the handles the little prongs would open up the hole they were inserted into, designed for cable sleeving.

Jar_421

used to work in a DIY store that sold "Fat Peckers"


They were bird feeders, but still

Sam Vimes

i worked in a phone shop and we had to take people's names when they bought phones. I asked a guy about 20 his name and he replied, with a tone that suggested he thought i was going to burst out laughing "it's swedish ok, my name is ruud van luu"

i didn't burst out laughing. I managed to hold it together until he left the shop

Riddle101

Gee bag
bag of gee
bag of ham
scat porn

monsoonish78

Boned eg "boned in Ireland"

KTRIC

Sam Vimes wrote: »

i worked in a phone shop and we had to take people's names when they bought phones. I asked a guy about 20 his name and he replied, with a tone that suggested he thought i was going to burst out laughing "it's swedish ok, my name is ruud van luu"

i didn't burst out laughing. I managed to hold it together until he left the shop

LOL, thats nothing compaired to "Frau Natzi" , she works in the local Lotto shop. I actually can't go in there due to complete breakdown in self composure.

tman

snyper wrote: »

Smegma is a funny word in my office. Its my one man office

Whatever you do, make sure you don't search for that on Wikipedia and look at the image...