Phone Sex?

LegacyUser · 30-06-2008 9:51pm #1

My boyfriend has gone abroad with work for a while and last night while on the phone, he initiated (or attempted to!) phone sex. I'm by no means a prude, but out of embarrassment I giggled and broke down laughing.

We've been going out a year, have a very healthy sexual relationship (well apart from the fact that I won't see him for 6 months!), however we have never done the whole "dirty bedroom talk" thing and it made me feel a little uncomfortable - tbh I felt a little foolish and stopped the thing.

However, as it's something he wants to try, I'm kinda willing to maybe give it a go, so any suggestions for overcoming the awkwardness would be appreciated!!

Wibbs · 30-06-2008 11:17pm

TBH I'm gonna be no help at all. I just can't keep a straight face myself doing the whole phone sex thing. Some do really dig it I must say. The only time I can get into it over the phone is were neither of us were actually saying "sexy" things. Just talking very quietly and really listening to the other person.

Talliesin · 30-06-2008 11:34pm

Mostly you just say things you'd like to do. In a way you can go a bit further and into things you'd kinda like to do, but part of you wouldn't want to actually do it for real. Leave that for a while though.

There's no harm having a giggle too. Fun is good.

RedXIV · 01-07-2008 12:34am

so what if you giggle in the middle of it? I've never seen sex go bad because someone laughed in the middle of it (guess i'm lucky

)

Only certain people seem to "get" phone sex and if words don't do it for you, it's not going to work no matter what you try. things that may help include setting the scene where you are, making yourself extremely comfortable and have things to stimulate the senses other than just the hearing one.

Also, if certain words set off your giggles, avoid them, tell your bf to as well.

Best of luck

Red

ShoulderChip · 01-07-2008 12:37am

it works well for the cunning linguist
others are not so good at it.

SnowMonkey · 01-07-2008 12:43am

maybe try texting first and work up to phone calls or......... mayeb start of texting working into a phone call/...Like if you booth know your at it then it might not feel so embarising ....

~Rebel~ · 01-07-2008 12:54am

Also always the option of webcams and MSN messenger!

LegacyUser · 01-07-2008 7:16am

Thanks for all the suggestions - I'm still cringeing at the whole "saying out loud" part of it all - I keep thinking of that episode of Extras with Kate Winslet in a nun's habit spouting off what she was going to do to her man when she got home, and I just crack up!

Have the webcam set-up but that's just so "american pie - nadia" - again, it makes me crack up (no I don't live my life through TV/film!!)

*sigh* I'll just have to suck-it-up (excuse the pun!) and give it a go!

hussey · 01-07-2008 7:22am

SnowMonkey wrote: »

maybe try texting first and work up to phone calls or......... maybe start of texting working into a phone call/...Like if you booth know your at it then it might not feel so embarrassing ....

+1
SMS could be ideal here, no face to face, you can watch TV while he has a w*nk.

MJOR · 01-07-2008 8:13am

Defintaely start with the texting..... its sooo hard to say it over the phone.... It makes me feel like a cheap porn star.....

Reminds me of a friend of mine whos ex used to scream at her "who's co€k do you want?" she used to just get hysterical:eek:

Karen_* · 01-07-2008 8:28am

If it makes you feel uncomfortable don't do it. Just tell him playfully to shut up the next time he starts it.

stevoman · 01-07-2008 8:34am

If you ask me phone sex is a bit of an americana thing.

Irish people in general methinks might be a little bit shyer about the whole thing. If you dont like it dont do it, its not the end of the world.

I know i wouldnt feel comfortable playing with meself over the phone with somebody!!!!!!

LegacyUser · 01-07-2008 12:16pm

Hi OP,

Deffo a bit cringemaking at the start but once you get in a routine that is comfortable to you and him its not so bad, you could just start small, something like....."remember the time we had that r1de *describe the occasion in your own words*...... *you looked so sexy in that white t-shirt etc I just couldnt keep my hands off you....etc*

So more like just talking about stuff that happened, once you get into the flow like that it will come along itself organically, he will probably have a fumble with himself eventually but it doesnt mean you have to....!!!

Think thats most girls fear of it, they are afraid they might have to go through with you know what themselves, you dont!!!

BubbleWrap85 · 01-07-2008 8:47pm

I've done it before, although I am absolutely crap at talking that sorta stuff out loud, I'd prefer to text it! However the whole "phone sex" thing for me is basically just the two of us getting ourselves off over the phone. The sound of the pleasure each other is getting from it gets each other off, in my opinion, possibly more so than words. Works for me anyway!

Miss Fluff · 01-07-2008 9:21pm

It's pretty straightforward and very VERY hot once you get the hang of it. Start of by describing what you're wearing (If it's a facemask and your period knickers I'd obviously lie), describing your lingerie etc, then huskily tell him each time you remove an item of clothing (getting him to do the same) and then describe what you'd like to do to him and what you're doing to yourself etc. Should be plenty of give and take so you both have time to get aroused etc. All I can say is relax, make sure you are nice and comfy and I'd recommend getting a decent lightweight sex toy to play with while talking to him. Great way of keeping the cobwebs at bay if you are not going to be seeing each other for a while.;)Phone sex is a great fantasy outlet, you don't necessarily have to be you, you can be the wanton filthy harlot you've maybe always wanted to be. Relax and it will come naturally (and so will both of you hopefully).