Is she playing a game with me or what?

LegacyUser

Ok guys I appreciate this isn't that much of a personal issue but I would be very grateful of some of your fine advice.

Ok so Friday night I went out to a club and got talking to a few girls inside. Got particularly friendly with one of them. Bought her a drink and whatever and not long after that ended up kissing her and getting very close for a good 20 minutes or so. After a while we went out for some air/smoke or whatever. I felt we had really clicked, she was telling me how she had no boyfriend and I kinda took that as a hint. Told her I had no girlfriend and she seemed happy to hear that. Then one of her friends said to her that we make a very cute couple and she seemed very happy to hear this! Anyway, she then asked me for my number, which I gave and got hers in return. Gave her another kiss and through one thing or another didn't end up seeing her for the rest of the night (it was quite late at this stage so maybe she went home).

So, texted her the next day saying hope you had a good night, I did, etc. Didn't get a reply so sent another one a while later. No reply.

She had told me that night me she's heading off to America the next day, meaning she's over there now.

So it's two days later now and haven't got a reply so I'm just wondering what to do now? Text her again? Don't wanna come across as too desperate... Or is she just 'testing' me to see if I'll try contact her again and that way she'll know if I really like her? Or does she just not want to commit to anything at the moment and wants to have a good time in America and maybe she'll contact me when she gets back? (don't know how long she's over there for though)

I just find it odd that we got on great, had a great time, and then when I try contact her she doesn't reply.

And advice appreciated, thank you!

(PS sorry for such a long post!)

Xiney

My guess is she was too busy getting packed & ready to text back right away

and now that she's over there her phone might not be letting her text internationally. I know mine won't send texts to Canada :mad:

bronte

DON'T keep texting her! Trust me, it can be a tad annoying if you keep at it.
She's in the states, so maybe she wants to chill out over there.
She'll get back to you when the time is right.

LegacyUser

I agree with BRONTE.
DO NOT keep texting her.
If she is "testing" you she's not thinking - "oh this guy keeps on texting me - he's a keeper!"
That will come across as desperate.
As other posters said, maybe she's having problems with her phone roaming in the states (it's pretty common)
Or maybe she's just looking to chill over there for the moment.
You don't and can't know.

What you need to do now is forget about her, let her enjoy the States and you enjoy yourself here.
You don't know how long she's over there - maybe she'll contact you when she gets back, maybe she won't. (and if she doesn't there's plenty more fish in the sea - you just need to know how to catch them
There's nothing more you can do so just forget about her for the moment.
It is harder said than done but that's what you gotta do.

damnyanks

stop being desperate. Just wait until she writes back. She is probably busy as pointed out. Worse case scenario she doesnt like you.

geminilady

yep agree with the other posters, so text her again. You texted her so its now time for you to wait. In the meanwhile try and take your mind of it.
She might be having problems with her network so it may not be worse case scenario what ever you do, wait for her to text you.
Good luck! keep us posted!

Wibbs

As others wrote, stop texting. She told you she was off to the states so will be exited and busy because of that. OK so you snogged and clicked. That's good, but you're not lovers yet by any stretch. If you want any more leave the poor woman alone to get back to you.

Men and women dislike overt desperation, but IMHO women really dislike it. Biggest turnoff ever. A man finding out that a woman likes him a lot will be chuffed and generally ok with that, but if the contact is out of balance he will be a bit irritated. A woman on the other hand in most cases will start to second guess the whole thing as you will come across as needy. As I said biggest turn off ever.

MagicMarker

Chances are that she had already left when you texted the next day!!

I really fail to see why you're over analysing the situation... She's not in the country ffs!! She may not have even brought her phone with her, or it could be off for the week or two she's gone!

If you continue to send texts, then she's going to get them all at once when she lands back in Dublin and turns her phone on!! Making you look like a crazy desperate mad man.

AngryBadger

I reckon you're overthinking the whole thing OP.

Did you know this girl before you met her on a night out? 'cause if you didn't then I reckon you're WAAAYYYYYYYY over-thinking this.

From what you've described she probably finds you atractive, this is not to say she'll want a relationship or whatever. Maybe she just wants to go on a few dates? Maybe she just wants someone for a few kisses now and then. Maybe she's decided you'er the man she wants to spend her life with.

The point is all of this has transpired in what? 2 days? And really all we're talking about is some encouraging flirtign, and a few kisses.

Personally I'd text her again when you know she's come back from the states, and see where it goes then.

The situation now was a bit messy in the sense that you met and she was immediately heading out of the country so there are several very good reasons why she may not have been in touch.

Wait until you're sure she's back, text her then to ask how the holiday went, after that the ball is in her court.

LegacyUser

Had a kinda similar situation this week..

Met a girl in a club in town last friday week, got on really well. did not kiss or anything, was the gent to her and I asked her (probably to soon) why not meet up during the week - So we exchanged phone numbers and we said our goodbyes in the club...during the week we were texting and getting on grand, mentioning again meeting up this weekend and stuff... though with a 'how are you' mid-week text from me she didnt reply. 2 days later, gave to ask her was she up for meeting up at the weekend and again, she didnt reply to me.

So what I will do now is forget about her, what can a guy do?. Could attempt to ring her but shes not worth it after not texting me back.

If she's not interested why doesnt she just text me back and say so? I'm not bothered now and have moved on. Women complain about guys who dont make moves, not ringing, texting etc. Some people have no manners.

akamossy

Dude, shes in america. Its possible she may not have gotten these txts and that she will get them when she goes home. Do NOT txt her again because if she does get these txts when she gets home and theres loads of them, the likelihood of hearing from her after that is slim. Just relax and realise shes away and its probably got nothing to do with you why she hasnt replied.

Moriarty

What-To-Do wrote: »

She had told me that night me she's heading off to America the next day, meaning she's over there now.

Nevyn

Moriarty Unhelpful and off-topic posting will get you banned from this forum.
Do take time to read the charter which contains the rules and abide by them.
Have a nice day.
Thaedydal

Overheal

What-To-Do wrote: »

Ok guys I appreciate this isn't that much of a personal issue but I would be very grateful of some of your fine advice.

Ok so Friday night I went out to a club and got talking to a few girls inside. Got particularly friendly with one of them. Bought her a drink and whatever and not long after that ended up kissing her and getting very close for a good 20 minutes or so. After a while we went out for some air/smoke or whatever. I felt we had really clicked, she was telling me how she had no boyfriend and I kinda took that as a hint. Told her I had no girlfriend and she seemed happy to hear that. Then one of her friends said to her that we make a very cute couple and she seemed very happy to hear this! Anyway, she then asked me for my number, which I gave and got hers in return. Gave her another kiss and through one thing or another didn't end up seeing her for the rest of the night (it was quite late at this stage so maybe she went home).

So, texted her the next day saying hope you had a good night, I did, etc. Didn't get a reply so sent another one a while later. No reply.

She had told me that night me she's heading off to America the next day, meaning she's over there now.

So it's two days later now and haven't got a reply so I'm just wondering what to do now? Text her again? Don't wanna come across as too desperate... Or is she just 'testing' me to see if I'll try contact her again and that way she'll know if I really like her? Or does she just not want to commit to anything at the moment and wants to have a good time in America and maybe she'll contact me when she gets back? (don't know how long she's over there for though)

I just find it odd that we got on great, had a great time, and then when I try contact her she doesn't reply.

And advice appreciated, thank you!

(PS sorry for such a long post!)

Chiiiiiill Winston,

I'll bet anything the phone was switched off and/or left at home, and not taken with her. Personally I use a 2nd phone while Im over here, it makes no sense using an Irish phone. Too expensive, and then you have to find a voltage converter for your charger, or a new charger, and its a hassle.

Just relax and dont flood her inbox with stalker-like behavior. Go ahead and send her one more text to put your mind at ease and leave it at that. One or two texts is nice to come home to. 50 is a bit much.

Fremen

Sending texts in a situation like that is almost always a bad idea. If you actually called her, this wouldn't be an issue. Sure it's easier and less awkward to text, but you run the risk of something like this happening.

akamossy

Definately no more texts anyway! if she has left her phone at home and you send too many texts you will not get a reply i guarantee you. You will come across as desperate and too keen. And she may be slightly scared. Wait a while.

Nevyn

Or she was trying to ditch you for what ever reason and used the excuse she was leaving the country and gave you a false number....

akamossy

Thaedydal wrote: »

Or she was trying to ditch you for what ever reason and used the excuse she was leaving the country and gave you a false number....

Good point, not a nice thing to think but sure is a possibility. hope this is not the case

colly10

Don't text her again, you'll look desperate, theres a number of reasons why she may not have got back to you. Forget about her and wait and see what happens

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies everyone, really appreciate it!

One thing I will add is I got positive delivery reports on my phone, so I'm pretty sure she got the texts. But I understand she could've left the phone at home, is having network problems or everything else you guys suggested.

Have laid off the texts now, might send one more in a few days to put my mind at ease, as Overheal said, then again might not. Haven't a clue when she's back from America though!

Doubt she used America as an excuse to ditch me though (could be a possibility!), she was showing me these new clothes she was wearing and crap she had in her bag (along with US Dollars) which she said she had bought especially for the trip.

Thanks again!

Overheal

yeah It would be really conceited of a girl to be carrying around greenbacks in her purse just to prove they were taking a trip to america

have a good summer