Quickies

rocky25

I don't know how many of you shop at Cesco's, but this may be useful to know.

I am posting this to you to warn you of something that happened to me, as I have become a victim of a clever scam while out shopping.

This happened to me at Cesco's Northside and it could happen to you.

Here's how the scam works:

Two good-looking 18-year-old girls come over to your car as you are packing your shopping in the boot

They both start wiping your windscreen with a rag and Windolene, with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy t-shirts

It will be impossible not to look :rolleyes:

When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' and instead ask you for a ride to another Cesco's

You agree and they get in the back seat

On the way, they start having sex with each other

Then one of them climbs over into the front seat and performs oral sex on you :pac: while the other one steals your wallet

I had my wallet stolen last Tuesday, Wednesday, twice on Thursday, again on Saturday, and also yesterday & no doubt tomorrow afternoon again...:eek:


Be careful out there
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
David Beckham goes shopping, and sees something interesting in the Kitchen department of a large department store.

"What's that?" he asks.

"A Thermos flask," replies the assistant.

"What does it do?" asks Becks.

The assistant tells him it keeps hot things hot and cold things cold.

Really impressed, Beckham buys one and takes it along to his next training session.

"Here, boys, look at this," Beckham says proudly.

"It's a Thermos flask."

The lads are impressed.

"What does it do?" they ask.

"It keeps hot things hot and cold things cold," says David.

"And what have you got in it?" ask the lads.

"Two cups of coffee and a Choc ice," replies David.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A large hospital recently hired several cannibals as it couldn't find enough Irish staff.

"You are all part of our team now", said the HR manager during the welcoming briefing.

"You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the canteen on the Ground Floor for something to eat, but please don't eat any of our other employees".

The cannibals promised they would not.

Four weeks later their boss remarked,

"You're all working very hard and I'm satisfied with your work.

However,

one of our secretaries has disappeared.

Do any of you know what happened to her?"

The cannibals all shook their heads "No".

After the boss had left, the leader of the cannibals said to the others,

"Which one of you idiots ate the secretary ?"

A hand rose hesitantly.

You fool!" the leader continued.

"For four weeks we've been eating managers and no one noticed anything.

But, NOOOooo,

you had to go and eat someone who actually does something."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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