Dreading the weekends

LegacyUser

I need to get this off my chest and rant....sorry

Am I alone in dreading the weekends? I have nothing to do this weekend. Nothing. I can't stand it. Don't get me wrong, when I have something to do I am fine, but when I don't I get terribly depressed.

Like this weekend. Nothing on. I am a member of a very active club and usually there is something to do with them on saturdays and sundays but this weekend there is not. I don't know what to do. I hate sitting around doing nothing.

Every time I have nothing planned on these days I end up depressingly refreshing boards or some other site constantly, and walking around the house in a daze, usually daydreaming. I have one or two friends (not in the club) who I see on friday nights and that is it. I am an only child and my mother is like me, just roams around the house. I think this depresses me even further.

Can anyone offer immediate advice for this weekend? Again don't get me wrong, I am not a depressed person, once I am back to work on Monday and have something interesting to look forward to next weekend I am fine. I can't shake the feeling I am just wasting my life with nothing to do sat and sun (I am 22) and think I should looking forward to going out clubbing or something with friends I can enjoy being around but those avenues are not currently open to me. Sorry to be so negative but I just cant shake this feeling of pointlessness/hopelessness for the coming two days.

Beruthiel

I absolutely love my weekends.
You are only limited by your imagination!

Why not go out of your way to make more friends?
Read? I can spend hours reading a good book.
dvds.
xbox.

Ever think of booking a hotel down the country with your Ma and enjoying dinner and a few drinks together?
Why not go to a boards beers?
Forums have started setting up their own beers. There seems to be one on nearly every weekend at this stage.
I thing BG&RH are having a session this weekend.
Next weekend is the Boards summer beers, there will be a large gang of us going to that one and they are great fun.

How Strange

OP, from reading your post it seems that you don't dread the weekend as much as you dread your own company. Lots of people are like that. The party is always somewhere else and being on your own equates to boring.

I used to be like that but now I love having some time by myself. Rent some dvd's, get outdoors and do something active, take an interest in something. Get off your a55 and organise something for yourself over the weekend and stop relying on other people to do that.

IMO, it's not a good thing to place your happiness in other people. Contentment comes from within yourself, the rest is just incidental.

Cmol

How Strange wrote: »

Get off your a55 and organise something for yourself over the weekend and stop relying on other people to do that.

IMO, it's not a good thing to place your happiness in other people. Contentment comes from within yourself, the rest is just incidental.

First off - i dont agree with this at all.
I've been in exactly the same situation as the OP.... some people are happy spending a lot of time in their own company and some aren't... I know for a fact that in order to be content with my life, I need to have a social life.

OP - I'm sure if you've been in PI before you'll know that your not alone in how your feeling!! A lot of us have been where you are now

The best advice I can give, is to sign up to boards (if you havent already) and get more active on here, there are loads and loads of people in the same situation as you on here!

Are you busy tonight? Come along to the BGRH beers if not, should be an awesome night

PM me if your signed up and I can meet you outside if you dont know anyone else

Beruthiel

Cmol wrote: »

PM me if your signed up and I can meet you outside if you dont know anyone else

An offer you can't refuse OP!

Beetlebum

Aaww, people on Boards are so f*cking nice, it's really great to see. Everyone's so friendly and helpful.

Op - get your ass to the beers tonight with the lads, I'm sure it'll be savage fun! if you choose not to go then you only have yourself to blame moping around the house.

MagicMarker

I think everyone feels like that at some point OP, including myself.. But to be honest, i love relaxing on my own doing my own thing!

This saturday night, get yourself a few dvd's, popcorn, icecream, crisps and a pizza and you're sorted for 4-6 hours or so.

Cmol

Beetlebum wrote: »

Aaww, people on Boards are so f*cking nice, it's really great to see. Everyone's so friendly and helpful.

Its true! I remember being blown away by the response I got when I first posted

RedXIV

If you want more plans for the weekend , there's a big martial arts exhibition competition in wicklow. should be good fun, so bring a friend and enjoy the show.

And echoing the sentiments of the people about beers tonight. JOIN US!

We're fun and semi normal, i swear

kraggy

How Strange wrote: »

OP, from reading your post it seems that you don't dread the weekend as much as you dread your own company. Lots of people are like that. The party is always somewhere else and being on your own equates to boring.

I used to be like that but now I love having some time by myself. Rent some dvd's, get outdoors and do something active, take an interest in something. Get off your a55 and organise something for yourself over the weekend and stop relying on other people to do that.

IMO, it's not a good thing to place your happiness in other people. Contentment comes from within yourself, the rest is just incidental.

If the Op knew what to do they wouldn't be on here. This is upsetting the OP, take it easy on him/her.

Also, if you read his/her post correctly you'd have seen that certain avenues aren't open to him at the moment for one reason or the other.

OP, how about sorting out something for you AND your mum to do by going to theatre. Or perhaps cinema? Or even a museum (depending where you are).

A good play in the theatre can be a brilliant experience, even if you're not particularly into drama.

Or perhaps take a trip ouit of town to Ireland's eye if you're in Dublin, or Fota Island if you're in Cork etc...

But if it's something active you wanted to do how about joining some other organisation/club to the one you are currently with so that in future you will have back up for next time your current club aren't meeting?

Hope you have a good weekend whatever you get up to.

How Strange

kraggy wrote: »

If the Op knew what to do they wouldn't be on here. This is upsetting the OP, take it easy on him/her.

kraggy, I fail to see how my post could upset the OP. This is some of what the OP said..

awfulweekendguy.... I need to get this off my chest and rant....sorry

Am I alone in dreading the weekends? I have nothing to do this weekend. Nothing. I can't stand it. Don't get me wrong, when I have something to do I am fine, but when I don't I get terribly depressed.
I am an only child and my mother is like me, just roams around the house. I think this depresses me even further.

once I am back to work on Monday and have something interesting to look forward to next weekend I am fine. I can't shake the feeling I am just wasting my life with nothing to do sat and sun (I am 22) and think I should looking forward to going out clubbing or something with friends I can enjoy being around but those avenues are not currently open to me. Sorry to be so negative but I just cant shake this feeling of pointlessness/hopelessness for the coming two days.

Also, if you read his/her post correctly you'd have seen that certain avenues aren't open to him at the moment for one reason or the other.

What avenues are you talking about. From his post he is fretting because his social club has nothing planned and he isn't comfortable being on his own without any plans.

You telling him to go to the cinema or the theatre or wherever with his Mum is the same as me telling him to organise something for himself. I don't know his interests so I can't suggest things for him.

But if it's something active you wanted to do how about joining some other organisation/club to the one you are currently with so that in future you will have back up for next time your current club aren't meeting?

So what happens on the weekend that neither clubs have anything planned? Should he join another club as a back-up, back-up club?

I think what the OP is experiencing is quite normal, we've all gone through it. As I said the party is somewhere else and we're not at it so the weekend is a drudge. But it's important to learn to appreciate time on your own because inevitably there will always be weekends where we are at loose ends and the phone never rings inviting us to things.

The Boards drinks is a great idea and it means the OP is getting off his a55 and organising something for himself at the weekend. Which is what I said in my first post. OP, if I upset you by saying that then I apologise, that wasn't my intention I assure you. Enjoy your weekend.

DenMan

Hi OP

Reading your post there it just seems to me that you just don't have any plans for this weekend. There's nothing wrong with that. What do like doing outside of work/college. Do you have any hobbies or interests. If you have a digital camera take it out and take some shots of the area you live in. I did that very recently and put together a great contact sheet with Photoshop. Looks brill. Photography can be a great way of taking your mind off things and its great to see your finished work in front of you. Maybe start writing a short story, that's a great way to take your mind off things. There is an entire social club right here waiting for you. All you have to do is get writing. Get registered first. Good luck.

celestial

How Strange wrote: »

OP, from reading your post it seems that you don't dread the weekend as much as you dread your own company. Lots of people are like that. The party is always somewhere else and being on your own equates to boring.

I used to be like that but now I love having some time by myself. Rent some dvd's, get outdoors and do something active, take an interest in something. Get off your a55 and organise something for yourself over the weekend and stop relying on other people to do that.

IMO, it's not a good thing to place your happiness in other people. Contentment comes from within yourself, the rest is just incidental.

Fantastic advice. Especially the incidental part. I think the older I get the more and more I realise how true this really is.

I think a lot of the responses posts on here should have this as a header or footer.

ntlbell

How Strange wrote: »

IMO, it's not a good thing to place your happiness in other people. Contentment comes from within yourself, the rest is just incidental.

This is a very important point.

But generally I think it's more of natural process that comes with age as you grow more comfortable "in your own skin"

Istrancis

I'll tell ya what to do, Weekendguy! Getcherself a good cookbook and spend your Saturday and Sunday afternoons preparing dinner. You could try something new every week! Here's a link to some cookbooks on Amazon, grab one of them and let's know how it goes:

http://www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_ss_w_h_/203-2322426-0910349?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=Cookbook&x=0&y=0

Cmol

celestial wrote: »

Fantastic advice. Especially the incidental part. I think the older I get the more and more I realise how true this really is.

I think a lot of the responses posts on here should have this as a header or footer.

ntlbell wrote: »

This is a very important point.

But generally I think it's more of natural process that comes with age as you grow more comfortable "in your own skin"

I know what your saying but I still dont agree with this. The world can be a very lonely place sometimes.

Even if you enjoy spending time on your own, im sure you have friends that you could call up to go out with / stay in with dvd's, its when you dont have that support system - that the OP seems to have lost - that things can start to seem hopeless.

OP - Where abouts in Ireland are you?

kowloon

Beruthiel wrote: »

Next weekend is the Boards summer beers, there will be a large gang of us going to that one and they are great fun.

Ooohh, summer beers! wheres that?

ntlbell

Cmol wrote: »

I know what your saying but I still dont agree with this. The world can be a very lonely place sometimes.

Even if you enjoy spending time on your own, im sure you have friends that you could call up to go out with / stay in with dvd's, its when you dont have that support system - that the OP seems to have lost - that things can start to seem hopeless.

OP - Where abouts in Ireland are you?

I think your missing the point a tad.

It seems that the OP can't stand any weekend where he has to spend it alone or where he has to entertain himself, this is a seperate issue to being lonley.

So the OP doesn't seem to have any problems going out meeting people etc the problem only pops up when he's alone on the weekend.

When we're content and happy with ourselves we can enjoy others company and our own, I love to go out for a few drinks as much as the next person and would mostly choose the option to be around poeple than not but I also love my own company and make the most of any time get with myself :eek::p

You're pointing at a totally different issue.

Cmol

ntlbell wrote: »

I think your missing the point a tad.

It seems that the OP can't stand any weekend where he has to spend it alone or where he has to entertain himself, this is a seperate issue to being lonley.

So the OP doesn't seem to have any problems going out meeting people etc the problem only pops up when he's alone on the weekend.

When we're content and happy with ourselves we can enjoy others company and our own, I love to go out for a few drinks as much as the next person and would mostly choose the option to be around poeple than not but I also love my own company and make the most of any time get with myself :eek::p

You're pointing at a totally different issue.

Different points of view. From what I gather, the OP doesnt have anyone to go out on the weekends with, so doesnt have the option of being around other people.

ntlbell

Cmol wrote: »

Different points of view. From what I gather, the OP doesnt have anyone to go out on the weekends with, so doesnt have the option of being around other people.

op wrote:

Am I alone in dreading the weekends? I have nothing to do this weekend. Nothing. I can't stand it. Don't get me wrong, when I have something to do I am fine,

So he gets out at weekends and meets people with his various clubs that he joins and he's fine when he has something to do.

The problem begins when he has to entertain himself, which it seems is a rare thing but it's still an issue when it crops up

this is down to being happy and comfortable with yourself and enjoying YOU he doesn't dread the weekend he dreads the thought of having to be around himself

celestial

Cmol wrote: »

Different points of view. From what I gather, the OP doesnt have anyone to go out on the weekends with, so doesnt have the option of being around other people.

Exactly. The OP has friends. It's about being comfortable in your own company and knowing you don't need people around you all the time.

Cmol

Im not about to have an argument here!

OP - Offer still stands about tonight, ill be online for another little while if you want to PM me

ntlbell

Cmol wrote: »

Im not about to have an argument here!

OP - Offer still stands about tonight, ill be online for another little while if you want to PM me

No one's trying to have one

Apoligies if it came across that way.

Beruthiel

kowloon wrote: »

Ooohh, summer beers! wheres that?

Check out the Events forum under the System menu.

scoot on

OP i'm like you, although I don't think I suffer as much from the depression but I always feel like i'm wasting my weekends if I don't have anything planned.
My bf is the complete opposite, he'd quite happily sit at home listening to music and chilling out. I just can't do that!!!
Like you i'm involved in a club that takes up a good bit of time but when I have a free weekend I find myself at a loss. I've taken up surfing lately. I just headed down to a beach nearby and got a two hour lesson and I'm hooked. It's great! I just check out the surf forecast and if it's good I head down, rent a wetsuit and board and head out for a while. You don't even notice the time going and you're knackered by the time you're finished!

DenMan

Surfing, that's another terrific idea OP. If you live reasonably close to the sea you really should consider taking it up. Do wonders for your confidence and will keep you reasonably fit. Consider it. I definitely will. Thanks scoot on.

scoot on

DenMan wrote: »

Surfing, that's another terrific idea OP. If you live reasonably close to the sea you really should consider taking it up. Do wonders for your confidence and will keep you reasonably fit. Consider it. I definitely will. Thanks scoot on.

No problem. I'd been meaning to do it for a while and it's completely addictive. It's great if you live somewhere reasonably close to the sea because if it's a good surfing spot there'll normally be others out aswell.

alo1587

Hey there.I know what you mean.What i do is, during the week i make a list of things to do, even if its the smallest thing like going to the shop for a magazine you like or going for a jog/walk or something.It might seem a bit silly but i just find if you have a few small things to look forward to, it cheers you up!

LegacyUser

I hear ya.

I lived in London for a few years and after I had split up with my gf I lived there for 6 months without having anyone to hang with on weekends. After I had gotten up and read the paper and maybe gone to the gym, I was at a loose end just waiting for the evening to come so I could watch tv.

Sundays were the same too. It was such a drag.

Now I'm back home and even though I have a big family and quite a few friends, being single at the weekend can still be a bit lonely.

THere are times in life when we'll be on our own (out of choice or otherwise) and while Aloneness can be a good thing, loneliness is not.

Do remember to get some exercise in as it does wonders for your mental health. Agree with the poster about surfing which I took up last year. New friends, good exercise, gets you out of the house - watch out though, it's addictive.