girlfriend.....

LegacyUser

basically my problem is that ive been seeing a girl for over 3 years now, i love her to bits and cant imagine my life without her. i suffer from anxiety quiet alot and depression and have been diagnosed by many psychiatrists. when im with my girlfriend, i look at her sometimes and get anxious if shes not looking "perfect". if i think shes not looking perfect or if i notice any imperfections in her then i get really anxious and think "oh my god am i really really attracted to her......do i really really love her?"
This thought enters my head and causes me alot of stress, anxiety and confusion. so is this my anxiety causing me alll the stress or are my real feelings that im falling out of love with my girlfriend? I hate to think the latter is true cos i love this girl to bits and it makes me cry when this **** happens in my head and i think that we may have to break up. anyone able to help me as this is driving me mad?

RedXIV

Time to a bit of a wakeup my friend. If we only ever saw the good in people, the world would be a much better place.

While everyone can be prone to thoughts like this, most people tend to shrug it off and forget about it. This seems inexplicably difficult for you so i suggest writing down a list of all her POSITIVE attributes and everytime you feel this judging coming into play, go read this list which should completely blow any failings out of the water. She is your gf after all

Best of Luck

Red

Doctor DooM

If this is a clinically diagnosed condition, you should seek professional help.

TBH what occurs to me when I read that was "cop yourself on, your not exactly perfect yourself."

But I don't think any amount of common sense or logic will help if you need professional help.

LegacyUser

i know what ye both say is true, its so trivial the things that upset me yet it does. my psychiatrist says its like ive got some underlying uncontentment issues regarding the relationship and as a result of this my mind is latching onto any negative thoughts regarding the relationship.

i really dont know what to do anymore as ive been seeing therapists, etc for over a year now. many of the therapists say maybe just break up with the girl but i cant help the fact that i love her dearly and dont want to lose her over this nonsense. because of what is happening in my head, im getting very anxious as a result of it.does what im saying make sense to anyone with anxiety, etc?

Victor

soconfused112 wrote: »

i really dont know what to do anymore as ive been seeing therapists,

I'm not sure if you will ge the full value from therapy if you are moving between therapists. That said, you shouldn't stay with a therapist where it isn't working.

nacho libre

SDooM wrote: »

If this is a clinically diagnosed condition, you should seek professional help.

TBH what occurs to me when I read that was "cop yourself on, your not exactly perfect yourself."

perhaps that is why he is identifying problems in her - he is projecting feelings/ conflict he has about himself on to her.