My Ex............ Help plz!!!!

mahamageehad

Hi guys, apologies for the long post but i REALLY need some help here, thanks in advance!!

Ok so i broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years about 5 weeks ago. We've been together since we were 15 and were very close. But recently enough i had realised that wasnt actually "in love" with him, and some of the things he was doing jst really started to bug me for some reason. :mad:

Ok so while i was all confused about how i felt, on a night out in a different town with my boyfriend in tow, I met an old friend of mine whom i'd always fancied and the sexual tension was incredible. I mean sparks literally flew. But because of my boyfriend nothin actually happened, but it made me realise that this "spark" was missing from my relationship. So i became more confused.

Then me and the boyfriend had a row and this led to us breaking up. He was very upset because he didnt see this coming at all, and he says hes mad in love with me. After a few weeks i texted the other guy and iv met up with him a few times since and I've even met his parents and been to his house. :cool:

But i felt really guilty coz my boyfriend is really heartbroken, and obviously he doesnt know i was txtn this other guy so i feel guilty bout that too. But he txtd me recently askin if we can be secret sex-buddies coz he misses me and what we had so much, but it would be jst between us and no-strings. :eek:

So would that be an incredibly stupid thing to do, ie make him think there's a chance we'll get back together or will it help him accept things and help me get over this guilt??

Thanks a million for reading all this and i appreciate any comments you have!

Puddleduck

Hi Op,

when you break up with someone there is heartbreak and guilt normally. That will pass as time goes by.
Id reccomend just not contacting him, at least for a few months to alloww him to recover, and turning down the no strings pity sex, its not going to lead anywhere good.

It would be an incredibly stupid thing to do. Anyone who has ever had a fúck-buddy will know that feelings can and will materialize. And if you do do this, how would the other fella feel if he found out (there's always a chance he will)

How, pray tell, would it help him accept that ye wont be together if ye are.. well .. together?

Break-ups are hard. Of course they're hard. And becoming fúck-buddies with your ex will only make it even more-so.

Tell him no.

mahamageehad

thanks guys pretty much my feeling 2....

Jesus Wept

mahamageehad wrote: »

I mean sparks literally flew.

Literally?

XxkikixX

in relationships there is no such thing as "no-strings". feelings are bound to come to the surface again and it would be unfair on him and you. dont do it to him, give him time to get over your relationship however hard it might be for the both of you.

niavie

there's no such thing as no strings unless its a one night stand and both parties are on the same wave length. Cut contact - I know it's hard but it is for the best especially if you have a spark with someone else, it's not fair on any of you.