Nervous about meeting the ex

LegacyUser

I am madly in love with my partner, we're together a year and dream of holidays, travelling, families and houses.. we have it all, and Im very happy. This weekend, we are going to a friends party and his ex will be there, he has moved on, but she hasnt. Im very nervous! Anyone any advice on how to handle the situation maturely? I fell nervous, but I know if Im just myself, it should all go well. Im not insecure, just very nervous!

Thanks in advance.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

nervous888 wrote: »

I am madly in love with my partner, we're together a year and dream of holidays, travelling, families and houses.. we have it all, and Im very happy. This weekend, we are going to a friends party and his ex will be there, he has moved on, but she hasnt. Im very nervous! Anyone any advice on how to handle the situation maturely? I fell nervous, but I know if Im just myself, it should all go well. Im not insecure, just very nervous!

Thanks in advance.

As long as you trust him, I don't see the problem. Beyond that, the anticpation leading up to these kind of events as always worse than the event is.

Miss Fluff

In what way has his ex not moved on OP?

Beruthiel

Miss Fluff wrote: »

In what way has his ex not moved on OP?

And how do you know she hasn't OP?

RedXIV

Tips:

1) Be courteous, cost nothing only the breath to say it
2) Be trusting, if you can't trust him, why bother with the relationship
3) Be understanding, she may not be over him, but that doesn't mean she'll try something, she could have resigned herself to suffering in silence

IanCurtis

You know you might just get on well?

If you get on great with this fella, chances are you'll have a lot in common with his ex.

Sounds mad, but I've seen it happen.

LegacyUser

Okay, well thats all valid and great advice. Thanks RedXIV for the pointers.

We were discussing it last night and I asked him had she moved on, its been about 3 years, and he didnt answer, I think he may know the answer and didnt want to hurt or worry me. They remained friends after the relationship ended and when he told her he met me, she said she couldnt be friends with him anymore, and that was that.

I donot doubt my man for a second, he's one in a million, we click very well. Trust is not an issue, we're a good team.

JackieO

Don't be stressing about this. Think of how much worse it will be for her. Particularly if you say she hasn't moved on. I doubt you'll be spending that much time exchanging niceties at the party.

She'll probably be doing her best to stay well away from the two of you anyway!

LegacyUser

Thanks so much JackieO! , didnt look at it that way... that puts a different spin on things.

tbh

realistically, you'll meet up a couple of times over the years. This is the hard bit you have to do to make the rest of those times a little easier. Don't worry about how she'll act, you have no control over or responsibility for that. Just maintain your own dignity and you'll be grand.

chuci

wouldnt worry about it really. just as long as you trust himself then there is no problem.

Miss Fluff

Tbh this doesn't have to be an issue unless you want it to be. You are happy in your relationship and you trust each other so don't jeopardise it over something that at this stage YOU and you alone are creating. Be happy in this great relationship you have and don't spoil it for yourself and your partner. Jealousy is so damaging and can consume you, avoid a lot of heartache (self-induced heartache) by nipping it in the bud now.

wandatowell

I myself would probably stay away from alcohol for the night, or at least watch how much I consume.

You can always rely on booze to cloud your judgment and to play with your emotions.