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LegacyUser

I dont know what to do. I just feel so low all the time. i dont think Im a bad person but these thoughts just keep coming into my head that I am worthless and would be better off dead. I have really strong urges to kill myself. I dont know how much longer I can go on. I know its wrong bt cant help it. Can someone please help me. I just can think of a good reason to carry on.

JuliusCaesar

Sucidle wrote: »

I just can think of a good reason to carry on.

Well, there must be people who care for you even if yu don't feel it at the moment and who would be devestated if you took your own life. You need to talk to somebody today, and a good place to start is the Samaritans. This is what they specialise in.

Then tomorrow, go see your GP. They will organise a referral to a specialist (psychologist or psychiatrist), or prescribe medication or both.

1 in 10 people gets severely depressed in the course of their life. The vast majority get over it and find reasons again. Hold onto this thought while you do what you need to do.

Best of luck, I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you - after all, you've taken the first step by posting here.

Dudess

Yep, straight to a sympathetic doctor. And a young/relatively young one if possible. I don't mean to be ageist but unfortunately there are some medical professionals in the pre-retirement age bracket who didn't learn that much about depression when they were training and may advise you to pull yourself together/lash out the prescription booklet. You need to have a good talk with someone first and foremost - it very much seems like you have depression/anxiety. Highly treatable. Try not to worry. There is always help - even when it feels like there isn't.

Kold

Life really is what you make it. I very much doubt that there isn't a way out of the situation you find yourself in. No matter how bad things get, this world is too vast to judge it on what you see. The key is to find out what you like, sometimes it just helps to get things in perspective. Why would you kill yourself when there's a whole side to this world you haven't seen?

Moss

You should contact a doctor immediately. Tell him/her exactly what your thinking and follow their instructions. This is not a good time to be trusting your own judgement. Recovery from depression takes time. Keep going back to your doctor and you will get better. He may refer you to a psychiatrist. Medication is almost always prescribed when the patient feels suicidal. Medication takes 4 - 6 weeks to work. So stick it out. Remember the side effects come first and then usually wear off as the anti-depressant effect kicks in. If you have any concerns about the medication communicate them with you doctor.

Some people get cognitive behavioural therapy as well.

Do get help as Major Depression is a episodic disorder and without treatment it tends to keep coming back.

Kold wrote:

Life really is what you make it. I very much doubt that there isn't a way out of the situation you find yourself in. No matter how bad things get, this world is too vast to judge it on what you see. The key is to find out what you like, sometimes it just helps to get things in perspective. Why would you kill yourself when there's a whole side to this world you haven't seen?

This "life is what you make of it" is utter sh!te. It shows you have no understanding of clinic depression. Would you go into St. Patrick's Psychiatric hospital and say to someone who has lost three stone in weight after a few weeks of severe depression and is bedridden staring at ceiling thinking of killing himself, "life is what you make of it", "just look at it this way". Do you think no one has ever tried that before? If it was that simple no one would get depressed. There is a significant biological component to depression. Changes in brain chemistry affect the person's thinking, sleep, appetite, energy, and libido. Its a disease and most people who get severe Major Depressive Disorder are helpless against it.

geminilady

Please dont give up, im sure there are lots of people that love and would miss you dearly. At this moment in time, your outlook may be skewed, and therefore see suicide as the way out of it, but it isnt. as someone once said suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem.
You are in control of your life, please talk to the samartians. Try not to handle your problems alone and isolate yourself, they will guide you in the right direction.
You are not alone, good luck OP, take care.

JuliusCaesar

geminilady wrote: »

. At this moment in time, your outlook may be skewed, and therefore see suicide as the way out of it, but it isnt.

In depression, your outlook IS skewed. Depression effects your brain, and what do you use for thinking? So your thinking process is faulty. Unfortunately in depression, the things you think and feel like doing - staying away from people, doing as little as possible - are the very things that make depression worse. Although you might feel your thinkinng process is flawless, it isn't and that's why you need to get help. Best of luck.

Esel

OP, you don't have to wait until tomorrow to go to a doctor. Go to any A&E department. All major hospitals have a psychiatric registrar. If you are desperate, you can even go to a Garda station.

You can also ring the Samaritans on 1850 609090.

Look, you may think suicide is the only way out, but that kind of thinking is caused by the state your mind is in right now. The world would not be better off without you.

Your immediate family would be absolutely devastated by this; they may never recover from it. Your partner (if you have one), your close friends - the same.

Speak to someone right away. The fact that you posted here means you have some insight into the fact that your present thought processes are wrong, and that you cannot trust your own judgement.

anonymous_joe

Speak to the Samaritans, to your doctor, etc. There is never any time when suicide is the right thing to do.

Liam Byrne

Sucidle wrote: »

I just can think of a good reason to carry on.

Firstly, it's fairly ironic that you didn't type the "'t" in that last sentence, even though your post implied it.....maybe that's your brain telling you that there is a good reason, but that - at the moment - you just can't see it ?

But just in case you're stuck for one, here's one (and you typed it yourself)

i dont think Im a bad person

It's only a small starting point, but it's a good one.....there are plenty of gob****es and scumbags and dodgy people in this world, and we don't want to lose any good ones, ok ?

Try to take some of the advice given above, and best of luck......in today's society, I'd defy anyone to say that they've never considered giving up; but most of us manage to muddle through the bad patches and come out the other side......things will improve - just make sure you're around with us when they do....

Bob the Builder

OP, i wish you all the best in trying to overcome your feelings. All I will ask you, and even beg you at that, is that you don't die by suicide or even attempt it. Two of my friends died by suicide two months back within one week of each other, and I haven't got over it yet, and indeed, probably won't. Please don't put this grief on the people around you, because you will hurt them more than yourself.

Going to a doctor isn't going to solve your problems, probably just make you feel like crap when they prescribe endless numbers of drugs. Drugs aren't going to do anything for you, and for one of my friends, it didnt do anything for him. Going to a guidance counsellor is probably the best you can do for yourself. At least that way, you can try to find out why you're feeling low, and work on it. I wish my friends did that, but they didn't, and I just hope you have the self realisation to help yourself, and see your own self-potential.

Regards,
Nev

Dudess

Nevf, I don't agree with you on the doctor thing. Not all doctors will just prescribe anti depressants and send the patient on their way. Younger doctors in particular (say, under 50) are trained to listen too. Plus, anti depressants work brilliantly for some people.

Awfully sorry about your mates, that's terrible.

Moss wrote: »

This "life is what you make of it" is utter sh!te. It shows you have no understanding of clinic depression. Would you go into St. Patrick's Psychiatric hospital and say to someone who has lost three stone in weight after a few weeks of severe depression and is bedridden staring at ceiling thinking of killing himself, "life is what you make of it", "just look at it this way". Do you think no one has ever tried that before? If it was that simple no one would get depressed. There is a significant biological component to depression. Changes in brain chemistry affect the person's thinking, appetite, energy, and libido. Its a disease and most people who get severe Major Depressive Disorder are helpless against it.

I agree with what you're saying but I also agree with what Kold's saying. I think you're being a bit harsh - Kold wasn't saying it in a dismissive way. Unfortunately there are idiots who clearly never suffered depression in their lives and advise people with it to pull themselves together, that they're only looking for an excuse to wallow etc. Or such idiots are self appointed experts on psychiatric drugs, which they believe to be the devil's work (yet they'd have no problem horsing into Nurofen or getting a penicillin prescription when they have the flu. Even more laughable is: I know people who diss anti depressants yet happily indulge in narcotic abuse at the weekends).
However I don't think Kold is one of the above. What he's saying is relevant but right now it's not much use to the OP or anyone going through something similar, as they just don't have the means to see the logic of his advice, or put it into practice. Some help will hopefully make the OP more capable of seeing things from a more positive perspective.

I would also say to go straight to the doctor/a counsellor as soon as possible as well as the Samaritans - rather than just the Samaritans. I'm not dissing them, they do excellent work, and I know they receive training, but I don't think they'd be equipped to give the OP all of the help he/she needs.

holly1

All I will say is I have been there and I went to my GP who refered me to a specialist and I havent looked back that was twenty years ago.
Please go to your GP or counsellor it will make a great diffrence.

Nevyn

Samaritans Nationwide Helpline 1 850 609090.

They are trained to help, posters here are not.

suzy5978

theres a phrase i heard a few years ago "this too shall pass"and its gotten me through a lot of crap.dont know much bout clinical depression but think you should go and have a chat with your gp.i cant imagine how bad things could be when you think the only way out is to die.just hang on in there and think how devastated your family would be if anything happened to you.

Marksie

Have a look at the stickies at the top of this forum page.

While we can encourage you in PI, we cannot give you the correct professional help you need, it is well beyond the scope of the forum.

Do look at going to your GP and getting referrals. You need to talk to somoene professional about why you are feeling like you are, in detail.

The only advice i would give other than that is something another poster said months back:

"suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem"

Do look at all the resources available.