The favourite quotes collection

WoollyRedHat

What is your favourite quote/s? Write here quotes and remarks that speak to you or that you like. The source doesn't matter but where known try to incluide it ( this is only in reference to famous people, where a friend or someone you know just state so.)

One of my favourites, by George Bernard Shaw: "The worst sin towards our fellow humans is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them."

Sherifu

"What's the number for 911?"

Jar_421

"I believe everyone can bring something to a conversation, but I think the thing you should bring is silence"

Arnold Judas Rimmer FTW!!

CountingCrows

You may look around and see two groups here; white collar, blue collar. But I don't see it that way, and you know why not? Because I am collar-blind.
- Michael Scott

LaVidaLoca

"On one thing men and women agree: They both distrust women."

H.L. Menken.



"You tend to find that the sort of people who turn to God, are the sort who havent really done that well with everybody else."

Dylan Moran.

Latchy

'' Ever notice that those who look down their nose at you always expect you to agree with everything they say ? ''



* not sure who said it but i like it *

KnifeWRENCH

"Do eggs grow on eggplants?"
My sister's friend.:pac:

Popinjay

"Religion? Shit it!"
- Stephen Fry

Xavi6

"No Dougal, Jack was ON trial IN Liverpool"

And pretty much anything else from the same show. Best ever.

Latchy

'' i was going to invite you over but was afraid you might turn up ''

an oldie but a goodie

Spud83

"Its not racism its ethnic criticism Bill".

Eamonn Dunphy

joeybloggs

Im in Study mode so....

The dictionary is the only place that success comes before work. Hard work is the price we must pay for success. I think you can accomplish anything if you're willing to pay the price."
-- Vince Lombardi

Boom_Bap

""I always say girl plus car equals dead animal." - Ken Miller (Freaks & Geeks)

kev_s88

me any my friends watching an american football game

one friend pipes up and says: "how many quarters are there?"

Sanjuro

Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms.

I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it.

I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.

All Groucho Marx

Lizzykins

Thoreau " The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation"

grames_bond

in no particular order

1)Dogs are forever in the push up postion

2)Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!

3)I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long.

4)I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.

5)I'm a heroine addict. I need to have sex with women who have saved someone's life.

6)Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?

7)This shirt is dry clean only. Which means... it's dirty.

8)Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

-Mitch Hedberg (1968-2005)

BKtje

See sig

Adam

A conversation between a friend of mine and her friend:

My Friend: "My throat has been really sore for days now!"
Her Friend: "You might have tonsillitis..."
MF: "Oh sh!t, do you think so? I had that before, it was horrible "
HF: "I dunno, c'mere... *proceeds to gander down my friends throat*
MF: "What are you looking for??"
HF: "To see if your tonsils are swollen."
MF: "Ok. Wait, I don't have any tonsils..."

She'd had them removed the first time!

Boom_Bap

grames_bond wrote: »

in no particular order

1)Dogs are forever in the push up postion

2)Every book is a children's book if the kid can read!

3)I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long.

4)I used to do drugs. I still do, but I used to, too.

5)I'm a heroine addict. I need to have sex with women who have saved someone's life.

6)Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus, or just a really cool Opotamus?

7)This shirt is dry clean only. Which means... it's dirty.

8)Rice is great if you're really hungry and want to eat two thousand of something.

-Mitch Hedberg (1968-2005)

Glad to see that there is someone else out there that knows about Mitch.

gerTheGreat

My sig, or,
Stephen Fry and Hugh Laury:

Landlord, I wil have two foaming pints of your most homosexual beer ... and a packet of arse bandits.

earlyevening

"Nothing matters very much, and few things matter at all."

Arthur Balfour

andyl222

I seem to have prematurely blown my wad, on what was initially meant to be a dry run....

tobias - arrested development

445279.ie

get down off the cross, we need the wood

Love it

zAbbo

B-K-DzR wrote: »

See sig

Good choice

Jeapy

"Stop talkin' s**t, I can't stand the smell of it."

My fave by a mile!

Acid_Violet

My sig, and then some:

The limits of my language are the limits of my world (some German dude, he said it in german)

St. Thomas Aquinas thought
That vultures were lesbians
And fertilised by the wind.
If you seek the facts of life
Papist intellestuals
Can be very misleading. (Kenneth Rexroth, from a Bestiary)

Any John Keats poetry, and pretty much anything Woody Allen has ever said.

Dellboy2007

My Favourite's

Beer: Helping ugly people have s*x since 1862!

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. -- Frank Sinatra

And you, madam are ugly. But I will be sober in the morning. - Winston Churchill to Bessie Braddock MP, who said he was drunk. (THE BEST IMO)

Hogmeister B

Where truth is replaced by silence, the silence is a lie.- Yevgeny Yevtushenko, Soviet dissident.

or the old Churchill classic, "he has all of the virtues I dislike, and none of the vices I admire."

stevecrow74

I came up with this one at a party while extremely drunk, when someone said 'your old'.

my reply was:
"No, I'm not old, I'm just more experienced at being me"