What crime should I commit?

allaren · 24-04-2008 08:32PM #1

I'm homeless and not coping and everyone is ignoring me. I want to commit some kind of crime so that people take notice of me (i.e. and I get help). I can't think of anything more original than breaking windows. Does anyone have any more original ideas?

admiralofthefleet · 24-04-2008 08:33PM

lust. nothing like a bit of self help when you arent coping

Lockstep · 24-04-2008 08:35PM

rape a small child. It will be both highly amusing and the kid will get some sweets out of it.

Caoimhín · 24-04-2008 08:35PM

Rape Bertie Ahern.
That is bound to draw attention.....

Zapp Brannigan · 24-04-2008 08:36PM

Suicide?

Insect Overlord · 24-04-2008 08:36PM

allaren wrote: »

I'm homeless and not coping and everyone is ignoring me. I want to commit some kind of crime so that people take notice of me (i.e. and I get help). I can't think of anything more original than breaking windows. Does anyone have any more original ideas?

Glue-ing small animals together would be pretty original!

Or you could head on over to PI for a calmer approach...

zuutroy · 24-04-2008 08:45PM

Regicide.

Pherekydes · 24-04-2008 08:47PM

Zapp Brannigan wrote: »

Suicide?

Not a crime.

Guy:Incognito · 24-04-2008 08:49PM

Homeless people on tinternet ftw!

Murder, shoot for the stars.

bluto63 · 24-04-2008 08:51PM

Go into a garda station with a stripper police uniform. The rest will come naturally to you

zuutroy · 24-04-2008 08:51PM

Slow coach wrote: »

Not a crime.

Wikipedia made me lol

lolwiki wrote:

Suicide has historically been treated as a criminal matter in many parts of the world. Although a person who has successfully committed suicide might be thought to be beyond the reach of the law (since they are dead), there could still be legal consequences.

Davidius · 24-04-2008 08:54PM

Scream "Falcon Pawnch!" followed by a firey punch to the person nearest to you. If they try to fight back insist that they show you their moves whilst saluting them.

sam34 · 24-04-2008 08:55PM

zuutroy wrote: »

Wikipedia made me lol

seems ridiculous now, but having it a crime was thought to be a deterrent to suicide in case you attempted it but didnt succeed, as you could then be prosecuted. they used prosecute for attempted suicide in the past. (not every one, think local guards had some discretion)

Jesus Wept · 24-04-2008 08:56PM

zuutroy wrote: »

Regicide.

If you know the name of the king or queen being murdered, press one. ..

Sleepy · 24-04-2008 09:03PM

Beat seven shades out of a TD?

Any will do.

Duiske · 24-04-2008 09:07PM

Make up a load of unfounded allegations against some country, then invade it !

Pighead · 24-04-2008 09:09PM

Move to France, buy a pig and call it Napoleon. You'll be locked up before you can say Sacre Bleu.

connundrum · 24-04-2008 09:10PM

Come over here and kick the **** out of the two young lads who insist that their game of 'kick the ball against the wall' is far more important than my sanity.

Murder will also do.

Raping them will be the last option.

taidghbaby · 24-04-2008 09:15PM

kickoutthejams wrote: »

rape a small child. It will be both highly amusing and the kid will get some sweets out of it.

ah yeah but he'd probably be called mr. L or somethin so people still wouldn notice him, and also he could claim he thought the child was older and then that wouldn be a crime now either!!

draw a pic of you raping mohammed-that would get you noticed very quickly!!

Cool_CM · 24-04-2008 09:16PM

connundrum wrote: »

Raping them will be the last option.

In case they like it and come back more often?
Ask a garda if it's really true he has to let you take a sh*te in his hat if you really need to, don't wait for a reply, steal it and get down to business.
Everybody will love you after that, except maybe the garda....

User45701 · 24-04-2008 09:17PM

If you are serious then kill several primitves, wait in town, anywhere, maybe templebar wait till you se somsone comit a crime and then kill them on the spot (assault/theft) Then after your arrest and explain you did it to clense the human race.

Thats enough attention because the media would eat that up