Have I "betrayed" him??!

LegacyUser

Hi all, going unreged for this one!

Just looking for some opinions. A few months back myself and my husband had a falling out with our neighbors.Long story short, they're impossible to talk to or reason with, so we have just agreed to steer clear. I honestly was afraid my husband would punch this neighbor because some of the things he said to me were very upsetting. Also because of the things that were said, I dont want to speak to him or his wife.

Anyway, yesterday I was walking in from the car and his wife asks to speak to me. So I stopped to listen (should I just have ignored her?? that would have seemed childish to me). She told me some other neighbors kids had been throwing things at my window, so she had closed the gate. As I listened, I started to think that made it up. I probably should have mentioned that she and her husband dont get along with these either, and I know that they have caused her some trouble. She seems to want to get a few people to complain about them. I will not do that as I have not seen them do anything to my property.

So then to my problem (sorry if i've completely gone off track!). My husband has been in a mood with me since I stopped to talk to her. And he's just told me he feels BETRAYED that I spoke to her after all she said to us. So im just looking for some taughts. Have I betrayed him?? I cant really see it, I have every right to talk to whoever I want to! And Jeez its not like I was in having a goss and a cuppa......

Thanks for reading my rant!

nevaeh-2die-4

dont worry about it,
it was just ur reaction when u seen the person come to towards u, its not as if you went out of your way to have a conversation he was probaly annoyd at the fact you didnt have the dinner on the table

Wibbs

I don't see how you've betrayed him. It's childish stuff, the kind of stuff that kicks off these things in the first place. Her husband who insulted you was being childish too. Your husband defending you in that case was laudable, but it's how you move on from that. OK he's probably wondering why you didn't ignore her after he defended you. It may be set in his mind that they're both wánkers and that's how he deals with it.

It seems like your neighbour was extending an olive branch between you and her anyway. Play it by ear, but include your husband in anything that goes on.

Whatever you do don't let it drive a wedge between you and your husband.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies, Wibbs I couldnt agree more. Its all so childish! I think it is just his way of dealing with it, even though it drives me nuts! Think i'll just leave him to stew a bit and calm down by himself, even if I do think he's being rediculous.

Thanks again for the replies

geminilady

i dont think you betrayed him, cause what were u meant to do run into your house. and it wasnt like u were directly talking to her husband or something or as u said going round for tea. your husband might feel alittle insecure about this situation so just remind that he's loved and do something fun together like watch a dvd or something i dunno! to help to get ur minds of it.

Dizzyblonde

You didn't betray him - it's not as though you befriended her. Anyway imo it's better to keep people like that at a polite distance - acknowledge them but don't be friendly. You don't want to keep hostility simmering.

Oryx

No I dont think you betrayed him. Hes being a little dramatic about it really, and he is now misdirecting his anger with them, at you.

Its unfortunate to fall out with your neighbours, it can make life so uncomfortable. I think you did the right thing in talking to her, I reckon its better to have cold civillity than outright war, which your husband seems to want.