Being served meals you don't eat by others

Faith

I've been invited over to my friend's for dinner this evening. It's very nice of her to invite me, I appreciate it. There are several foods I hate, which she knows about. The main one is curry or chilli or anything spicy at all. Just can't palate it. The first time I went round, she served curry with broccoli and mushrooms (both of which I hate). I choked it down. When she asked me beforehand what I'd like, I said "anything, so long as it's not spicy!".

The next time I went round, what was I served? Spicier vegetarian curry. I left 90% of it.

I was invited the next week for chilli, but I declined.

Now tonight I'm almost sure that she'll serve curry again! I do appreciate her going to the trouble of making me dinner, but what's the point if she consistently makes dishes I hate?

Anyway, this obviously irks me a bit and I'm wondering A) Do any of you have friends like that, who ignore your dietary preferences when making meals, and What you do when you've served something you don't like? It doesn't have to be that you don't like it, it could be that you're served meat when you're a veggie, carbs when you're doing Atkins, that kind of thing.

nice1franko

Just say: aw I'm really sorry but I can't eat that. Spicy stuff makes me sick! Thought ya knew.... have you any garlic bread?

It prolly wouldn't happen again!

oblivious

Third time is fair enough to remind her that you don't est spicy food, but don't forget to thank her for the invite/food anyway

Kintarō Hattori

How good a friend is she? To be served food twice that you've told her you can't eat is pretty inconsiderate. That said though have you really made a point of saying it to her or have you just said it casually? What did she say when you mentioned it to her?

rockbeer

If she cooks you a curry again, wait til she leaves the room then stir the contents of a large bag of dried chilli flakes into the pot. Make sure it's seriously, inedibly hot. Then when she serves up, decline politely, apologizing for not being able to eat spicy food, and sit back smiling smugly to watch her sweat and struggle through her own nightmare.

Confess all afterwards. You'll either have a great laugh about it and she'll never serve you anything spicy again, or you won't be asked back. Either way, you win.

Ponster

Faith has managed to start a (mild) PI thread in Cooking & Recipes

If it was my *friend* that did that to me I'd wonder if they were trying to tell me something, I honestly would.

The answers to the quiz are :

A) No, I don't think I have any friends like that. Some don't ask but at least when they do they seem to remember wht people don't eat.

I eat everything so have never been in that position, sorry !

Loopy

Yes I have a friend who can't cook for her life but dosen't realise it. One time, she asked me over and she said she was doing a lovely pasta dish. I swear to you, it was pasta with tomato sauce. Yuk She is a dreadful cook but very enthusiastic about it. I have bought her cookbooks and diplomaticaly tried to take over in the kitchen when I arrive but she shoo's me away and I have to try and eat what she puts up.. Eventually I was straight with her and just said look Ill come round and cook a few dishes to give you a few ideas and we cooked up a storm. She has improved slightly..

I would be honest with your friend and when she next asks you, say that you really cant stomach hot/spicy food, that it actually makes you feel ill of late if you do eat it..

Minder

When we occasionally get asked to dinner, I always ask what's on. Mrs Minder doesn't eat piggies so I like to know in advance. If piggies are on the menu, we either decline or tell our host straight - no piggies. Tell your friend, no curry, no spices or no visit;)

daiixi

No, I pretty much eat anything except for offal. I don't really like fish but I'll eat it to be polite although I used to (and sometimes actually still do) tell people I'm allergic to it so they won't serve it!

Faith, I think you pretty much just need to sit her down and tell her that you love to visit her for dinner but you don't like x, y and z. As for the spicy side of things I love spicy food as your friend seems to however what she (and I) thinks is mild, you may think is mouth burning HOT!

The Sweeper

I can't eat bi-valves. I will eat literally anything else I am handed, from frozen veggie burgers with beans up to a four course meal, but I cannot eat bi-valves. If someone serves me a dish with them in, I'll apologise and just leave them to one side.

Out of politeness, I will make an effort to choke down stuff that's pretty awful because I'd never trample someone's efforts if they stand there anxiously watching you for approval (I mean, how rude would it be to go 'Yeah, mmmm, not my taste' and push it away?? Everyone starts somewhere!).

My pet hate, as opposed to something I just can't eat - my pet HATE is when someone gives me undercooked potatoes.

Crunchy spuds. [/shudder]

Faith

Ponster wrote: »

Faith has managed to start a (mild) PI thread in Cooking & Recipes

Lol, yeah, I wasn't really looking for advice, more seeing what others [would] do in a situation like that.

As it turned out, she served a lovely morrocan-style meal, but when she was telling me what she made, she started off with "We decided at the last minute not to make chilli".

P. Breathnach

I hope you availed of the opportunity to tell her what a relief to you that was.