I think I may have rage issues..

LegacyUser

I've calmed down now, but about 15 minutes ago, I nearly flipped over the most trivial of things. This is gonna sound stupid, but I was simply playing a video game, and I completely lost it. The video game was not the catalyst though, I have noticed in other aspects of my life that Im suppressing a lot of pent up aggression.

Im quite a muted individual, I dont make a lot of noise and am completely non-confrontational, and I think it may be time that I change this. Im not saying that I necessarily need therapy, but I've found myself more and more frustrated and angry with co-workers and friends/family to the point where I have to leave the room, count to ten, etc. all the so called "tricks" that you use to get past the issues. Im not going to go postal or anything, but I do feel that its only a matter of time before I say or do something that I will completely regret.

I would say that Im quite a well spoken, sane(ish!) individual, well educated, well read from a really solid family upbringing, so I cant blame any socio-economic factors on this.

Anyone suffer the same? Whats your advice?

BlackMamba

That happens to me too!! The simplest things set me off!! It's worse when nothing goes my way!! It got so bad one day that held my brother up against the wall and shoved my arm into his throat. Harsh, I know but I just completely snapped. And I'm afraid that it could happen again.
I don't have any fool-proof advice to give you. I just use the same techniques as you,breathing, counting etc. You could always do something that relaxes you, usually helps in a stressful situation.
Hope this helps!!:)

LegacyUser

I have similar problems when someone ***** me over.
I get utterly obsessed with revenge, even the smallest thing will eat at me for weeks.
I once hijacked and shut down the account of an eBay seller who scammed me, something I could potentially get in a lot of trouble for. I couldn't let it go.

I think you need to find out why you're so highly strung, tackle that and it's easier to stay calm. For me it was my job.

Sleepy

Primal Scream.

Find somewhere you can let rip and scream your fvckin head off. Works wonders for me when stuck on the M50 during my daily commute.

Virgil°

Get yourself one of those stress relief putty things that return to shape when you mash them.
I broke my one:o.
But it worked quite well while i had it.
But thats only treating the symptoms and not a cure. You need to find out whats making you so stresseda and eliminate it.

board om

can i ask those people who say they have a problem with rage, do you by any chance smoke the whacky tobaccy? like would you be fond of a few spliffs in your spare time?

please answer honestly, and please dont think i am judging you or anything like that.

missmatty

I'm the same but only occassionally, not all the time. It's partly inherited I think in my case (my Dad has it too) but seems to really affect me when I'm hormonal. Luckily the worst i've ever done is put my foot through a door (and not a person!). I just have to remove myself away and wait for it to pass. Haven't found a cure yet

Dragan

board om wrote: »

can i ask those people who say they have a problem with rage, do you by any chance smoke the whacky tobaccy? like would you be fond of a few spliffs in your spare time?

please answer honestly, and please dont think i am judging you or anything like that.

While i can almost appreciate the relevance i think you are reaching quite a bit.

To everyone with rage issues, try dealing with the things that annoy you at the time instead of letting them all build up like that. Two things will happen.

1) You will hurt someone who doesn't deserve it.
2) You will go off on the wrong person and get hurt yourself.

AckwelFoley

It could be stress

Gumbyman

Hi,

It is most likely due to stress and frustration about something unrelated. Sit down and go through your day in your head. Do you feel like the whole day is winding you up like a coil? You need to try to detach and not become so involved in things. The World is not out to get you.

Hope this helps.

Gumby.

Gumbyman

Do you drive? Do you get road rage? Need to nip this in the bud. It is extremely dangerous and leads to aggressive driving and death.

board om

Dragan wrote: »

While i can almost appreciate the relevance i think you are reaching quite a bit.

To everyone with rage issues, try dealing with the things that annoy you at the time instead of letting them all build up like that. Two things will happen.

1) You will hurt someone who doesn't deserve it.
2) You will go off on the wrong person and get hurt yourself.

dont worry, its not a case that i think all stress derives from spliff. i have noticed that people who have smoked more than average amounts of spliff on a daily basis for a number of years tend to fly into a rage quite quickly and then snap out of it just as quickly. i used to smoke a lot when i was younger myself and man did i have a temper then.

it was more an 'out of interest' theory than anything.

so raging posters, do you smoke da herb? i promise im not a copper and i wont nick you...... (honest guvner)

Overheal

Grrr! wrote:

I've calmed down now, but about 15 minutes ago, I nearly flipped over the most trivial of things. This is gonna sound stupid, but I was simply playing a video game, and I completely lost it. The video game was not the catalyst though, I have noticed in other aspects of my life that Im suppressing a lot of pent up aggression.

Im quite a muted individual, I dont make a lot of noise and am completely non-confrontational, and I think it may be time that I change this. Im not saying that I necessarily need therapy, but I've found myself more and more frustrated and angry with co-workers and friends/family to the point where I have to leave the room, count to ten, etc. all the so called "tricks" that you use to get past the issues. Im not going to go postal or anything, but I do feel that its only a matter of time before I say or do something that I will completely regret.

I would say that Im quite a well spoken, sane(ish!) individual, well educated, well read from a really solid family upbringing, so I cant blame any socio-economic factors on this.

Anyone suffer the same? Whats your advice?

Been there.

The problem with being completely non-confrontational is your boundaries: you'll find them continuously shrinking as you have to interact with more and more people. If you have a problem with someone you should look for a way to bring it up before it becomes a snap moment. Set boundaries and stick to them before someone gets a chance to step all over you.

I used to do a lot of shouting to myself and seeing if I couldnt break my speakers when I came home from school but you don't get that same empty-house-privilege when you're out sharing a flat. All I can advise is find a good place to scream. Unfortunately I dont think I have one

UnregGirl

If that behaviour is out of character for you then that sounds like a stress issue. Are you under a lot of stress at the moment that could be building up and making you explode like that over inconsequential things? I went through the same sort of thing recently, i felt overwhelmed by everything and was under constant stress and would snap over the smallest thing, usually by shouting, saying things i would later regret, which resulted in me losing my best friend btw, and bashing my fists off the worktop which obviously just makes you feel worse. A solution i used, on the advice of a counsellor, was either to walk away from the immediate situation, and incorporate 10 mins twice a day of complete relaxation such as meditation into my day, which made me feel like a calmer person as a whole. It sounds like your situation could be similar to mine, as in its only a temporary reaction to whatever critical instances are going on in your life at the moment. Also in my case i felt like i was out of control of what was going on in my life which didn't help. Does this make sense at all?

Caoimhín

Bottle it all up inside, in a big ball of rage.

Do you work in the post office?

DublinWriter

Sleepy wrote: »

Primal Scream.

I think Primal Scream therapy has been largely discredited by modern therapy as it doesn't tackle the base issues.

OP - mediation, yoga and a good sense of humour FTW.

Wibbs

caoibhin read the charter. No unhelpful posts.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the replies guys. Seems to have dissipated today, I would be worried if it was a persistent underlying feeling. I actually had a very chilled day today, and I'd probably attribute it to the fact that I was a little more confrontational today with people who pi$$ed me off recently.

Its quite therapeutic. It wasnt nasty, I was calm, deliberate. Got my point across. No counting to 10 necessary..

Listening to Elliot Smith helps too..

Cheers for the support.