Totally Lost

LostGirl

Hiya

Have been debating about whether to post on all of this... have some wierd paranoia about someone i know seeing this and telling my ex.. or something, have decided I need to get it off my chest more than anything!!

Ok, I arrived in Ireland in June last year with a friend of mine for a working holiday, a couple of months after I arrived I met an amazing guy... when my friend moved home in Dec last year, the boyfriend moved in... things were (i thought) going really well, up until about 3 weeks ago when he came home and told me he was moving out... havent really had an explanation about it yet, but from what I understand its not really to do with me but because of other stresses in his life and living with me (on the other side of town to where he was working, in a dodgy flat, in a dodgy suburb -- came home to a guy stabbed outside our front door a few weeks ago!!!) wasnt really helping... I do understand that he was really stressed out, and from what I can see, changed the only thing that he had actual control over... anyway, I am absolutely heartbroken about this, he was the love of my life and I did not see this coming at all.... So I am left in the dodgy flat, in the dodgy suburb with all the bills etc to pay...

Then, exactly a week to the day he left me, I was made redundant.... again, totally unexpected....

I feel like my life has literally been turned upside down, no boyfriend, no job etc etc.... My main issue at the moment is having people to talk to, when my friend left in Dec, i only stayed in Ireland because of the boy, I didnt really have much of a life over here as far as a social life goes, we always seemed to be saving for trips around rather than getting out and meeting people... I need to get out of this flat but cannot afford any deposits or anything at the moment, but its a total catch 22, I cant afford to save either as am paying massive rent for a flat I dont want...

arghhhh I feel like my world is falling apart!! I dont really know how posting on here is going to help, just to vent more than anything, i dont want to run away and go home because I think I am strong enough to stay here and have a good life but all I want at the moment are my friends and family who are on the other side of the world!! I dunno, if anyone thinks they can offer some good advice I would appreciate it more than you know!! My head is an absolute mess at the moment....

smiler26

I don't know what to say, but I completely understand how you feel.

Would you think about maybe getting someone to move in for a few months.... just until you have time to sort a deposit for somewhere new. Daft or putting up a notice in work might work.....

LostGirl

Its a tiny one bed flat, wouldnt be comfortable living with someone else here... i know it seems like im being fussy but it really is absolutely tiny!!!

StandnDeliver

why not head home,ask family or friends to buy you a flight,put flat up on daft or something to get it rented,or hand in notice.No shame in going home,your secure,you can recover emotionally and take time away from worry,its what i would do.

Profiler

That is a horrible situation.

There is however some positive in this, nobody can accuse you of not trying, it's better to regret things you've done rather than things you haven't/

What you could do is put the good and the bad of this situation down to experience and move on.

Maybe move home, maybe move to another city or country, but you walk away with your head held high and some stories to tell the grandkids!

cormac_byrne

Maybe you need to look at a room in a shared house rather than another flat. Might help you with a new start with socialising etc...

But probably you need a job before you move, so that's a high priority.

As for the bills and current rent, once you've got something else lined up just do a runner, if you've no connections here how would they find you?
Apart from the deposit what have you to lose?

Obviously pay your debts at some time in the future when your doing better ;-)

LostGirl

A Shared room is what I would be looking for, still need deposits for that though!
Going home is definitly an option at this point and the parentals have already offered to front up for a ticket.... They way i'm looking at it though, I didnt come to this country for him, why should I leave because of him?!?! Plus, going home = another winter, im desperate for some sun at this point!! I just dont know, one minute I want to book myself onto the next flight home, the next I want to stay and fight for my life here!!