Sticky situation with my brother and sister

Rockstar*

Ok I am about to make a life changing decision - I have the opportunity to go on a once in a lifetime trip for a year, only one thing - its going to cost 25k up front.

The thing is I have received a sum from inheritance at least double this amount.

My Sister/Brother will not be pleased I am about to spend this amount on travelling and doing it so soon but this opportunity will ot crop up again until May 2010.

I really want to do it , it involves travelling the entire world as part of crew on a ship.

What are peoples views on this - would this be such a big mistake?

My alternative by the way is to spend 10k travelling south east asia , oz etc for 6 months..

Please put yourself in my shoes "for real" and tell me what you'd do - theres so much more i need the money for - mortgage, house etc

Im 26 and a guy

Thanks a lot for your help

pearlygate

if i was you, i'd go and see the world. I've the mortgage and the lot and wish i had done a world tour when i had no ties. your family will prob not be too pleased but your not hear for a trial run go and enjoy yourself, and put the rest away from when you come back. good luck and enjoy!!

LegacyUser

first of all, have you sailed before? Do you know what your getting yourself in for? Its a completely different way of life!

second of all, the chances of you ever having 25 grand cash to go jump on a ship for a year again is very unlikely. if this is what you want to do, go for it!

2Scoops

Rockstar* wrote: »

I really want to do it , it involves travelling the entire world as part of crew on a ship.

You're going to pay 25K to... work as part of a ship's crew? The 10K trip sounds like better value to me.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

I've heard horror stories from people who worked on a crew ship: ridiculously mad hours for one thing and you can't just walk out. if it is a job research it well.

Now a question: I assume the inheritance come from a recent passing, so what would the person who died hae advised you to do? If I leave 50k to someone when I die, I want it spent in the happiest way possible.

Fanny Cradock

I would be of the opinion that spending €25,000 on a working trip would be madness. I guarantee that 25k will come in handy down the road.

Consider the possibility that you may not actually enjoy working on this boat. You are either stuck bobbing on the ocean for a year, or you jump ship and leave it all behind you, including your money.

Better to be the master of your own destination and travel around SE Asia. This way you decide where to go and how long to stay. From personal experience you could do SE Asia for less than 10K. You have to be willing to rough it, though

Anyway, it's your money and your decision. Choose wisely

chris85

Would go for the 10K trip. i would not pay someone so i can be working as a crew member, not a chance. rememeber that it is still work and there is little freedom involved.

why not extend the 10k trip and involve south america and africa. Maybe volunteer building houses in africa, work as a barman in Oz for few months, travel the orient express, raft down the amazon river and even go to canada or alaska and live in an igloo

This is just my opinion but I would love the opportunity to do what i just said. Be careful what you spend your money on.

m83

How the hell is it costing you 25K? That sound ludicrous IMHO.

biko

Look into a year long working holiday in US, Oz or SA instead. You'll spend a bit getting there and travelling about the place but you can also earn some working odd jobs. Work in the Caribbean.
25K for a crew job seems like a crap deal.

unreggd

You're paying for a job

job = work and they pay you

So, could ye not do the work for free to cancel it out??


Honestly, do something you'll enjoy, no point in savin for a rainy day, its always rainin in ireland!

But the ship idea sounds crap tbh

Miss Fluff

Rockstar* wrote: »

Ok I am about to make a life changing decision - I have the opportunity to go on a once in a lifetime trip for a year, only one thing - its going to cost 25k up front.

The thing is I have received a sum from inheritance at least double this amount.

My Sister/Brother will not be pleased I am about to spend this amount on travelling and doing it so soon but this opportunity will ot crop up again until May 2010.

I really want to do it , it involves travelling the entire world as part of crew on a ship.

What are peoples views on this - would this be such a big mistake?

My alternative by the way is to spend 10k travelling south east asia , oz etc for 6 months..

Please put yourself in my shoes "for real" and tell me what you'd do - theres so much more i need the money for - mortgage, house etc

Im 26 and a guy

Thanks a lot for your help

No offence OP but I have never smelt such horsesh1t in my life. 25k? Do tell? I presume as part of an Oirish round the world sailing crew? 25k seems exorbitant. Elaborate please......

niceoneted

I have thought about doing what you are about to do.I think the best all round option is to take a 4 week holiday every year to the various different countries that you wish to visit. It will give a great insight into the other cultures of the world.

Overheal

This ship, right... that you are paying money to work on... its not in any way similar to a DC-10 is it? Not called the USS Thetan or anything?

Sounds questionable. How much do you know about it? I'd be concerned theyd take your money and then move you out into int'l waters and harvest your organs or something. Then just tell people you jumped ship in Peru when you met some girl.

Bad vibes.

Beruthiel

Rockstar* wrote: »

Ok I am about to make a life changing decision - I have the opportunity to go on a once in a lifetime trip for a year, only one thing - its going to cost 25k up front.

I really want to do it , it involves travelling the entire world as part of crew on a ship.

I don't get it.
You work as part of a crew and instead of them paying you, you pay them? Sweet deal for the bloke who owns that ship!
I think you'd be mad to go with that option, so many things could go wrong further down the line and you probably won't get your money back.

My alternative by the way is to spend 10k travelling south east asia , oz etc for 6 months..

This to me sounds like the better option.
You're not working for a crew (which you could turn out to hate after paying 25k up front)
You can come and go as you please.
Move if you don't like where you are.
Stay longer if you like a place and above all, the freedom invloved without being stuck to a ship.

Please put yourself in my shoes "for real" and tell me what you'd do - theres so much more i need the money for - mortgage

Your 10k option still leaves you with a good chunk of money for a deposit on a house further down the line. Your 10k option means you can have both and if your bro/sis says anything you can point that out to them. You only live once and if you don't do this now, you never will once you get the house and the trapping that come with it.

ems_12

I would go for a trip/experience of a lifetime - only thing is, like the others here, being crew on a ship doesn't seem like my type of trip of a lifetime. :eek: 'Horses for courses' I suppose, go for it *shrugs*

mikemac

The ships owner charges 25k to get to work for them for a year?
That guy is a genius
I had to read the first post a few times, I assumed the job on the ship paid 25k and you got to travel around the world too

Go with Option 2 OP, go travel but make your own plans and go where you want to go.
Your money, your choice

Wook

smells like EMO crap to me...

How Strange

IMO, paying 25k to work on a ship or work anywhere sounds very dodgy. I'd have thought you'd work for free and get food and a bed instead but paying yourself??

Also, I'd imagine 10k to travel for 6months would mean you'd be travelling in style and living it up. Along with woofing and volunteering (without paying for it) you'd probably be able to travel for longer on 10k and see more of the world. I'd def go with this option.

Rockstar*

ok ok ok I was surprised to read the response but having thought about it I can understand the reaction ...I take it none of you have seen the "Tallship Chronicles" on Travel channel following the Barque Picton Castle ?

Its been an ambition of mine to go on this trip for the past 4/5 years. You really would need to at least see the program to understand to be honest before grasping what its all about. They circumnavigate the globe every 2 years - This years trip is a little different in that it is crossing the atlantic and visiting some European countries also.

I have thought about this trip and researched it till no end. YES you do work as a crew member (technically it's actually a "sail training school" but most it seems do this just for experience) and I wont go into why this appeals - I can only recommend you watch the programme for yourselves. Its an excellent program by the way.

Listen guys I think you're missing the point -

1) I want to do this trip

2) Is it too soon for me to leave to go travelling having just been left the inheritance?

3) Is it "wrong" to pay out half of my inher on just travelling ( or should I do SEA etc for 10k instead)

thanks for the replies - they were very helpful

Mazeire

Whoever left you that money left it for you to use it for what you wanted to do.

So if travelling is what you want to do then do it. Let your brother and sister decide how they spend their money not yours.

I'd go on the US and Asia trip. You'll be able to see what you want to when you want to and not have to go by someone elses schedule.

Only thing though, if you do go with this, dont try to hit up your family for deposit money for a house when you come back.

justsomebloke

truthfully if you have spent this much time researching it, just go do the bloody thing.

Is it too soon after getting the inheritance? No it sounds like perfect timing. However is it to soon after the event that caused you to get the inheritance only you can answer.

Is it wrong to pay half of your inheritance on travel? I would go with no, yes it could help set you up for life, but what is point of life if you can't get to live your dreams. So I say blow it as it sounds like fun


edit: just as a matter of interest have you tried sailing before

Beruthiel

Wook wrote: »

smells like EMO crap to me...

Unhelpful comments are not welcome here.
Read the forum charter.
B

WindSock

Can you not do the travelling thing and incorporate a sailing bit in it? I sailed on a beautiful tea clipper in Queensland for a few days and only cost a few bob compared to 25k. I'm sure there are longer trips to be done if you wanted. If you have any sailing experience, you could always advertise yourself in a yacht club. That costs nothing.

GhostInTheRuins

Ok, forgetting the reason why you want to go on the trip, it's your money. Don't worry about what your brother and sister think of your decision, it's your money not theirs. Go for it.

Beruthiel

Rockstar* wrote: »

ok ok ok I was surprised to read the response but having thought about it I can understand the reaction ...I take it none of you have seen the "Tallship Chronicles" on Travel channel following the Barque Picton Castle ?

ok
I've looked it up. The ship is beautiful. I think it's very expensive for what it is. You will spend a lot of time at sea instead of exploring new countries.
Is it the ship that most attracts you?

I'm still of the opinion the 10k option is a better idea.

nmk

Being devils advocate, if you've never sailed before and took a notion about going sailing in a tall ship because of a tv programme I can understand how they might be critical. Maybe do your yachtmasters first and see how you like it and if you'd still want to go.

Another option to see the world this way would be to hook up with people travelling in more average yachts as crew taken on for say, help with the Atlantic crossings/reduce the night watch rotas/cut costs. You'd pay your expenses but not have to shell out for the boat. It would be a cheaper option of doing the sailing around the world thing although you are going to be in a more enclosed area with people. With 50k you could even buy into a yacht with others wanting to do the same thing as you and have an (albeit somewhat depreciated) asset at the end of your travels. I see the appeal of tall ships, and would go for it if I had no ties and the money sitting there.

At 26, I don't know why your siblings should have a say either way in what you do with your share, if you do blow it on something they don't value are you going to go scrounging off them? If you're not and never have they can voice their concerns but butt out imo

dellas1979

Yeah, have you been sailing before? Is it a romantic notion or are you genuinely interested in sailing?

To be honest, 2010 is nothing to wait if you are unsure.

Then again, if you do it and spend the 25K then you still have 25K left, which is still a good amount. I wouldnt really do something that I was doubtful about. Is there a deadline or something? Is that why you cant decide/dont have enough time?

junior_apollo

From personal experience you could easily do SEA,and get to NZ and OZ all for 10K - No doubt...

If your spending more than that then your not having fun.. You'll see so much more - meet such a broad range of people from every walk of life - enjoy so many different cultures, customs and lifestyles that there is no way I would trade that for the boat trip costing me more than double.

I stayed in hostels - Decided month by month where to go next - maybe stay few months here or there... but 10K got me everywhere I wanted.. I stayed in Oz for a year at the end of it all - And admittedly did run out of money during that part - But its so easy to pick up jobs in Oz and NZ that I was never worried..

Again to reiterate.. IMO I would regret never doing Asia and Oceania... I was 23/24ish when I went off as I had finished up in college and wanted to relax for a bit...

I could see no reason for spending that sort of insane money when you could do so much more with it... What you see on TV are the frills of that adventure... They show you what they want you to see... Find reviews, documentation etc about it first - If it checks out then it looks like from your comments though that your mind is set.. your intent on doing this boating and if so - then do it...

But make a rational decision... Research - Research some more and then decide...

Maybe look at the costs of doing a trip - Asia - NZ - OZ - America where you could link in a Years working holiday Visa for one of the Oceanic countries or a J1 for America or both!... But I guarantee you that even a huge trip like that which would probably take 2-3yrs minimum wont come out at 25K

Both trips involve working... so realistically you might spend 10K to get to NZ/OZ... Work for 9-10 months - save up some more money and f3ck off to the next destination .. by that time you'd easily have another 6-7K (after partying hard at the same time, more if not) and that'd get you around to America etc... Work there if need be while your there...

But from experience dont think it makes financial sense the way your doing it... 25K to work and travel... or MAX 15K to work and travel a LOT more

Again each to their own - these are just my opinions and thoughts - but do consider everything first...

Eve_Dublin

Hi OP.

I think you should do it! I'm off travelling around South America for a year this month. On a very tight budget, it's going to cost me E8,000, which is about $12,300 so i'll have about $1000 a month to spend and from what i've heard, that should be just enough as long as i don't splash out on a couple of weeks at the Hilton, which i'd have no interest in doing anyway.

My money was a long time coming to me. My mother passed away when i was 11 (i'm almost 28 now)and got a pay out from her old place of work on a monthly basis 'till i was 18. My dad saved it for me and i invested it in the SSIA scheme over 5 years ago and last April i got about E12,400 back. 2 years ago, i decided to use the money for a Masters in UCD. I applied for the course and was offered a place and my family were delighted as it was the "sensible" option but i knew i didn't want to do this particular course and i was only doing it because i felt it would keep them happy (did i really want to be a librarian for the next 40 years...a LIBRARIAN? WHAT WAS I THINKING?How "sensible can you get!). I know my mother would've been delighted if used the money for this purpose and would've thought travelling around for a year on my own was a ridiculous idea.

To cut a long story short, i always wanted to go travelling and it dawned on me that i wasn't living my life for my parents or my family or my deceased mother. You have to live your life for you and you only get one chance. If this is what you want to do in your heart of hearts, do it. You don't need anyone elses approval. My family have got used to the idea and i've finally convinced them that travelling for a year is better than doing a masters in something i never wanted to do and they've been very supportive. I'll probably come home with some level of fluency in Spanish and i'll learn alot of life lessons. You're lucky to have this opportunity, not many people will ever get the chance (and some people might even resent it). If it turns out to be a disaster, at least you can say you tried and you'll have no regrets on your death bed.

Follow your heart!

board om

jsb wrote: »

edit: just as a matter of interest have you tried sailing before

yeah, that is a good question. have you sailed before? and i dont mean bopping around in a speed boat for an afternoon, or taking the seacat to holyhead. i mean proper sailing. becuase if you havent got a good bit of experience sailing then i wouldnt advise your sailing debut to be in a boat that big that spends that much time at see with a price tag of €25k. tbh sailing is great fun and i would recommend it to anyone, but it is also hard work on a large boat, and it takes some time getting used to. if you havent spent a few days at sea before you dont know if you are going to be able to pick it up quickly, or if you are going to even like it, or if you will be sea sick, etc. in other words something like that isnt for beginners. trying to learn to sail on something that big would be really jumping in at the deep end.

but regarding the money end of things, you were presumably left the money by someone who wanted you to be happy, and i dont think they would be very happy if they knew you didnt do what you realy wanted to with it. if you pass up on your dream now and settle down and buy a house, you are going to be miserable and you are always going to resent you brother and sister and yourself becuase you didnt do what you really wanted. life is too short so enjoy it while you can.

di11on

First off... you can make this decision a whole lot easier for yourself by removing your brother and sister from the equation. The person that left you the money will only want you to be happy.

Beruthiel wrote: »

...You will spend a lot of time at sea instead of exploring new countries...

I think this is the crux.

Are you more interested in the sailing experience than seeing/experience new peoples, countries and cultures?

Are you €15,000 more interested in sailing?

€25k is a lot of money. Put it in context. €35k is what the average person earns in one year in Ireland.

If it was me... 10k to see SE asia... no argument :-)

Actually.. if it was me, I'd probably buy €50k worth of sterling :-)

In the end, only you know how much you want to do the sailing thing... and if that's worth €25k.

Plek Trum

First off- congrats on the courage to explore and contemplate your dream, fair play to you.

In my opinion, I think you would be better off doing a bit more research before taking such a huge decision. Friends of mine sailed from Ireland to Spain last year onboard the Jea nie Johnston http://www.jeaniejohnston.ie/
It was a five day crossing and they worked as part of the crew, learning and being trained.

Two notable things happened (a) one person who's dream it was to do the trip couldn't handle being at sea AT ALL and spent the majority of time in bed - and this was in perfectly calm conditions. (b) the other person who went along reluctantly has now taken up sailing!

Its a hard one to call, I can appreciate your dilemma. Why not book a place on the Jeanie, do a short trip and see if its for you? Its not that expensive and will give you a feel for things and a chance to run it by experienced crew members. Maybe you can combine your sailing dreams with some overland travel and experience the world that way? I would hate to think that you may not get value for money by spending 25k on the tallship alone...

junior_apollo

Plek Trum wrote: »

First off- congrats on the courage to explore and contemplate your dream, fair play to you.

In my opinion, I think you would be better off doing a bit more research before taking such a huge decision. Friends of mine sailed from Ireland to Spain last year onboard the Jea nie Johnston http://www.jeaniejohnston.ie/
It was a five day crossing and they worked as part of the crew, learning and being trained.

Two notable things happened (a) one person who's dream it was to do the trip couldn't handle being at sea AT ALL and spent the majority of time in bed - and this was in perfectly calm conditions. (b) the other person who went along reluctantly has now taken up sailing!

Its a hard one to call, I can appreciate your dilemma. Why not book a place on the Jeanie, do a short trip and see if its for you? Its not that expensive and will give you a feel for things and a chance to run it by experienced crew members. Maybe you can combine your sailing dreams with some overland travel and experience the world that way? I would hate to think that you may not get value for money by spending 25k on the tallship alone...

+1

Would deffinately give you a better feel for whats to come...

Then if it tickles your fancy do the big trip
If not..
Then go do Asia etc...

Either way u get sailing and a trip haha

MsFifers

I would STRONGLY recommend you do not commit to spending the 25K until you have done a "taster" of this type of trip. Why not sign up for an Asgard trip for a week or two? http://www.asgard2.ie/index.php Or even a sailing course with Glenans? http://www.gisc.ie/

I have done a fair bit of sailing and a lot of the time you will be cold, tired, seasick, bored, annoyed by sailmates, fed up of tinned food, craving hot showers!

You may be able to tell - I don't really like sailing all that much! However - members my family love it - and it can be a really lovely way to see places and meet people.

I'd be very concerned though about shelling out for something that expensive before you know how much you personally rate the upsides v.s the downsides.

If you find you do like sailing and being at sea, you could also do a sailing trip for a lot less than 25K. Your contacts in Asgard or Glenans (assuming you do the courses) would I'm sure be able to let you know how to find out about crewing on rtw trips.

I know someone in the Carribbean at the moment who is looking for crew!

Agent Smith

25k to Work on a ship?


MADNESS


do South East Asia. More Fun and if dont like it, you can always come home.


What happens if you desperatly want to leave the ship?

I have to agree with most people. 25k is a bit steep to pay to work. I would go for the cheaper 10k option as it seems you'd get more out of it.

Jim

Its your money. Spend it how you want. Go travelling if thats what you want. Buy a house if thats what you want. Your bro and sis should just want what'll make you happy.

I can never understand people who think buying a house and settling down is the ultimate goal in life. Settling down and working for the rest of your life and having an annual holiday to the Canary's suits some people, not everybody.

But as people said it is alot of money, so do make sure you want to do this trip for your own sake.

dh0661

Rockstar* wrote: »

Ok I am about to make a life changing decision - I have the opportunity to go on a once in a lifetime trip for a year, only one thing - its going to cost 25k up front.

One of my husbands friends done something similar to this a few years ago, I don't think it was in the 25K region, but it had to be paid up front.
He couldn't stick it, and was back home about ten weeks later, and he had to pay for his own flight home.
All I can say he was not a happy camper, I mean, sailor.

Dragan

I think maybe the person who left you that money would be very please to see you deciding to get out there and see the world and would be delighted that they were able to help your development as a person.

Go for it.

Beerlao

i totally agree with the people who suggest you should only take the trip if you're an experienced sailor. while you will be travelling, you're only going to see sea and sky most of the time, whereas travelling on land (i.e. the SE Asia) option you're going to see and do a hell of a lot more, meet more people from all over the world, spend much much much less, and party like it's 1999.

it may be your ambition to do this trip, but i'd certainly suggest doing a smaller one first to get some experience and decide if it's really right for you. 2010's only 2 years away.

i'm 27 and i travelled australia and SE asia for a year and a half, worked quite a bit of it and i paid off my debts from it not long after i got home. i certainly wasn't worrying about crap like mortgages etc because i have the rest of my life to worry about stuff like that. and certainly don't worry about what your bro and sis think... why would you?!?!

besides, i reckon you'd have more fun floating down a river in Laos on a tyre tube drinking all day and flying off rope swings for US$4

Pigletlover

If it was me I'd go with the 10k option, but that's because spending a year on a boat sounds like torture to me! This is something you obviously want to do and that's what matters. Just because everyone else is doing the Oz/New Zealand/SE Asia thing doesn't mean you have to. Sure it'll cost a lot less, but will you always regret not doing what you really wanted to? Even by spending 25k on this trip, you're still left with 25k. That's 25k better off than a LOT of people your age.

Don't worry about what your brother and sister think, I think it's incredibly selfish of them to try and talk you out of what you want to do with YOUR money.

I would say though, before you commit to anything get some sailing experience (assuming you don't already have some). This may look great, but it would be a shame to find out you're not cut out for it after paying over 25k.

Victor

Rockstar* wrote: »

Ok I am about to make a life changing decision - I have the opportunity to go on a once in a lifetime trip for a year, only one thing - its going to cost 25k up front. .... My Sister/Brother will not be pleased I am about to spend this amount on travelling and doing it so soon but this opportunity will ot crop up again until May 2010.

There are scams along this line. Are you going into this with eyes open and brain engaged?

LegacyUser

MsFifers wrote: »

I would STRONGLY recommend you do not commit to spending the 25K until you have done a "taster" of this type of trip. Why not sign up for an Asgard trip for a week or two? http://www.asgard2.ie/index.php Or even a sailing course with Glenans? http://www.gisc.ie/

+1, I was (and still am) entranced with the romance of the tall ship, it is in my blood, lonely sea and the sky, and all that.

Did the Asgard2, beautiful, beautiful ship. Disliked it, luckily it cost me nothing as a leader with a youth group. 25K is simply too much to spend unless you figure out first if you like deep sea sailing.

I'm guessing if your siblings are so annoyed about how you spend your inheritance, that it is a parental bereavement, if so, condolonces, and take your time.

dh0661

O.P. - please let us know what you decide.

And best of luck with what ever decision you make.