Midwyche Cuckoos. Capo 1st,29lines,2min15sec.

humberklog

The tune came first and wrote the words itself. It left just a few blanks to fill in. Which was handy. It's a very simple tune where the notes are on a near continual loop. Capo first fret and although i play it through notes these chords are near enough. It's C(shape)C(shape)Am(shape)F(shape)G(shape). It's cut comma and kicks off on "spell"(first line).
The choruses are indated as 2lines and the tune varies there a little by throwing in a few passing 7ths.
The slightly deceiving device about the song is the varying 'cut'. This makes it a lot more interesting for me to play.



MIDWYCHE CUCKOOS

Cast a spell to bring you down.
Cut-out landscapes, sprawling towns
Will hypnotise you.
And lift us out of here.

Be near strangers on a train.
That'll change at every station.
An impulsive fear
Will bring you down.

Lay back, slowly part.
Stay so still and make no sound.

Look away and take it on.
Keeping still without a sound.

Crossed your ankle with a ribbon.
Teased your mouth into submission.
I made you crawl.
Then watched you fall.

Exposed, taut, laid out shiverig.
Your body, outstretched, glistening.
(in cum and sweat).
Slides smooth on porcelian.

Through moisture's cold reflection
Lies a cold and heartless passion.

Through moisture's cold reflection
There's a glimpse of recognition.

I'll take you down.
Cast a spell and bring you down.
And be the stranger that changes
At every station.
And take you down.

Jack DeValera

Its very difficult to look at song lyrics just written down - they don't really exist until they are sung out loud, but I'll tell you what I think of this anyway.

Cast a spell to bring you down,
Cut-out landscapes, sprawling towns ---- This is fantastic writing, I love the rythmn of it.

Crossed your ankle with a ribbon.
Teased your mouth into submission.
I made you crawl.
Then watched you fall.

This bit is great too. The next verse however, I don't like

Exposed, taut, laid out shiverig.
Your body, outstretched, glistening.
(in cum and sweat).
Slides smooth on porcelian.

I generally don't like this kind of graphic writing, and I think there is a reason you don't see it in many songs. Most listeners will hear 'glistening in cum and sweat'. If the image is supposed to be repulsive, then maybe I might use it, but I don't think that's what you're aiming for here.

Rest of it is fantastic.

humberklog

Jack DeValera wrote: »

Exposed, taut, laid out shiverig.
Your body, outstretched, glistening.
(in cum and sweat).
Slides smooth on porcelian.

I generally don't like this kind of graphic writing, and I think there is a reason you don't see it in many songs. Most listeners will hear 'glistening in cum and sweat'. If the image is supposed to be repulsive, then maybe I might use it, but I don't think that's what you're aiming for here.

.

Good man jack. I was hoping you'd respond and you've picked out a part that does indeed sit different and awkward. I wrote it as i want it to read but i sing it as i want it to be heard. There's a change in timing at that verse to make it a bit more interesting and it's heard as

Exposed thoughts laid out shivering
Your body's outstretched,glestening.
Cum and sweat
Slides smooth on porcelian.

It is a graphic verse as most of the song is set in the imagination of someone that's seeking one off dominating sex with an attached woman who is seeking escapism. So it switches from fantasy to reality and i was hoping to make the diference ambigeus(nice spelling).
I hear what you say and i'll have a think about it. I was hoping that you could take a listen as it really needs a tidy bridge in there somewhere and a bit of minge wrapped around it. Could i send you out a cd of it and you could maybe have a tinker with it (if you like it)for next airing room?

humberklog

Jack you were 100%right. That verse had to go. Cheers.