Dont Know What To Do..

LegacyUser

Where to start.. Hmm.

I have reached what it seems to be one of the hardest and most confusing decisions of my life, and Im quiet scared about making the wrong decision.**

**You can leave that till last after some background.

Last March I dropped out of 5th year because I was unhappy with the school, so it seemed. I found myself only coming in 2-3 days a week and was falling behind due to lack of motivation there. So I left and decided to repeat 5th year again, but in a different school, but heres the stupid part.
My GF at the time was in another town 15 minutes away, and she was my diamond in the rough (the rough been my life), so I thought to myself if I moved to a school in her town I would be highly motivated to go because it would give me the opertunity to see her a few times a week instead of the one. (I know, how stupid can I get your thinking) And it worked. (for a week-read below)

Anyway, school was starting, I was pumped to do well and she was very supportive of me. So after a full week of school, going in, doing pretty well, a first for me in a long time we out of the blue broke up over something so small.
This hit me like a brick, and that was it. It went downhil far worse than everbefore from that. I was severly down alot and thinking about stupid things. Left me a emotional wreck, and seeing her everyday was/is awfully heartbreaking.

I began to not care about school more than ever. I want to care, I want to go in and do well put theirs always a wall. I will go in for 2 days one week and for the next three to four weeks after I wont go in at all. And I hate it. I try to force myself but Im one of these people who wont do something when they are unhappy doing so. And Im getting very worried about this. I feel awful for my parents, I really have let them down, and myself.

I really dont have anything going for me bar being able to play guitar well and I think to myself whats the point of going on because without my leaving Im pretty screwed never mind with a leaving. Especially these days..
I have never been school worthy as such, like getting good marks. All revolve around C's and D's.

This is where I have to make the decision. My friend (who is 2-3 years older, Im 18 in June btw) is moving to cork, and I have the opertunity to go with him (also a musician) where their are great resources for the onlything Im good at. Music. but that will require dropping out of school. My heart is telling me to move to Cork and how to put it, follow my dream. But I have a bad gut feeling about this move, yet at the same time I dont want to miss this opertunity by deciding to try and fail. (which will more than likely gonna happen)

I really dont know what to do. Im scared and Im all over the place =( and so is this probably.

Beruthiel

Personally, I would urge you to finish your leaving cert.
At 18, it's always difficult to make decisions about your future, you have no clue who or what you'll be by age 25.
Completing your leaving cert sets you up for whatever you may decide down the line. I believe if you do not complete it, at some time down the line, you will deeply regret that decision. It will close many doors to you and narrows your options.
I understand that a year feels like a long time at your age, but in the grand scheme of things, it's really nothing.
Do your adult self a huge favour and do the leaving.

How Strange

OP, look at the bigger picture here. You're 17 so believe me you will regret not having finished school by your early to mid 20's. You will be virtually unemployable and this is especially true in a slowing economy.

You're 18 in a few months at which point you'll be considered an adult - you can vote, drink etc. I'd say take a mature look at your life right now and ask yourself do you really want a life of struggling, quite possibly poverty and minimum wage jobs? That's whats ahead of you.

Go back to school, apply yourself, finish the leaving cert and aim for a good one. Then go and follow your music aspirations. At least you'll have finished your education. It's great that you are interested in music but how many aspiring musicians end up as buskers? Far more than succeed.

Music and education don't have to be mutually exclusive. Channel all that negative energy into something positive through your music and then focus on getting through the last two years in school. It might not seem like it now but you'll be glad in 3 - 5 years time that you did.

RuthieBaby13200

Hi OP, as the last 2 posters said really if you stick it out and finish your Leaving you'll be delighted in the long run!!
I repeated my leaving cert, thought it was going to be pure hell, but ended up having a brilliant year, put my heart and soul in, made tons of new friends and got in with where i wanted to be!

Sure keep your head up, finish the two yrs then go on and pursue your music dreams as you put it!

Best of luck with it!!!:)

r3nu4l

My advice is to stay in school. The opportunity to travel to Cork is NOT a once in the lifetime opportunity. There will be many years in which you can decide to do that

It sounds like you had a very rough time and were unable to cope well with what happened. Perhaps you could talk to a doctor about it? Ask them for advice and whether you need some counselling. A counsellor can teach you some good coping skills that can get you through rough times.

Either way, if you got motivated before, you can and WILL do it again. Playing guitar in Cork would give you some thrills.Cool as that is, an education gives you something to fall back on. You can carry on playing guitar while you do your Leaving cert and you'll always be able to find some kind of further education if you have a Leaving cert, whereas your options are severly limited without a Leaving cert.

If you need to repeat another year, do so. Honestly, it's better to do so now than to decide in 5 years time you should go back to school

Do it now! Get back in there and even if you have to repeat another year, go for it! It will be worth it if you let nothing stand in your way of working hard to get better marks and then you can turn around to the world and say "F*** you, I did it, now where's my guitar?".

all the stars

Hi,
Stay to do the leaving cert, its april next week, only 2 months... then as soon as finished go down to cork.. and persue what you want..
Your friend by then will know all the pubs clubs & have got settled in..

Glowing

A bad leaving cert is better than no leaving cert- and it'll be easier than you think to get a decent amount of points (even if you only get C's and D's!). If unfortunately the music thing doesn't work out then at least you'll have something to fall back on. Facing unemployment with no qualifications is a daunting thing, and even a mediocre L.C can get you into a Fas course etc. You'll have the rest of your life to follow the music dream - honestly! And the few months between now and June is just a drop in the ocean. Knuckle down for the next few months - and talk to a teacher you like for advice. They'll offer you help and support and encouragement when they hear that you're willing to make an effort.

Good luck!

Redpunto

In the grand scheme of your life, 2 years to complete your leaving cert is nothing, in know it feels like eternity but you will always regret it if you drop out now. Could you go to a community college instead to do your leaving cert? Could you sit down with your parents and explain this to them, or write it down for them (might be easier). Im sure your parents just want you to be happy but also want you to have every opportunity you can. Completing your leaving cert will open up more opportunites for you than quitting. Have you looked at college/plc courses relating to music like sound training or media production etc. Try www.nightcourses.com or www.daycourses.com for learning from all sources. If you find something you like it'll encourage you to try your best in school.

LegacyUser

I'd second everyone in saying do the LC. However, I'd want to look at the reasons why you're not attending school. Is it motivation? No friends there? Are you depressed? What's the problem?

RedXIV

Hey man, take it from me, breaking into the music scene is HARD, you will need something incredible to make a living out of it and even then, you have to constantly re-invent yourself to make it a lifetime money maker.

You're gut reaction is telling you not to go, this is because you already know what the right choice is. You may not like the idea of going to school but surely you've been in it enough to realise that the leaving cert is the foundation stone for so many options you can pursue in life. Don't make the mistake here of throwin away your education. I can promise you now that you will deeply regret that decision in years to come for the rest of your days

Overheal

The risk of supporting yourself on music is staggering. If you ask around, you will discover that most cover bands, that play 2 nights a week, make a good earning do so, still have day jobs. And they have talent. Every once in a while they try and make it. Sometimes they do but its so very rare.

My stepfather has been a musician for 30 years and only in the last couple has he stopped doing cover bands. During the day he is a networking analyst. He knows how to write good songs, and over time he has worked with some pretty amazing talent. A few of which got together and made this band. They even got so far as producing their own video and getting it on MTV for a week, and then they were back in reality. They all still have day jobs.... Bobby was my waiter once at a mexican cuisine.

Do yourself a huge favor, and go back and finish school. That doesn't ever mean giving up the music.

You do not have to drop out of school to move to Cork anyway. Cork isn't that backwards is it? You still have options.

All revolve around C's and D's.

It depends on your motivation entirely. I got 265 points in 5th year. I got 405 points in 6th year and got plenty of B2s and Cs, in courses that I either never took before (economics) or had failed miserably the previous year (english).

colly10

OP I would be very carefull about this decision cause this is going to be one of the most important decisions of your life.

Even if you are a good musician id say it would be very difficult trying to make a career out of it. You would have to have something to fall back on so would have to be very motivated/hardworking if it doesn't work out. There would be a good chance that you could end up in a low paid job.
Whether or not you complete your leaving, chances are you are going to be working Monday to Friday for the rest of your life, doing the leaving will give you more job options and thats pretty important cause you don't want to spend the rest of your life doing something you despise

Either way, if you decide to stay in school, you have to start going alot more, it's pointless even turning up if your going to miss weeks at a time. Few people actually enjoy school, people get on with it though cause it's in their own best interests. It's fairly ****ty that your girlfriend broke up with you but is fairly irrelevent to this, she'll be a distant memory in a few years but the decision you make now will directly affect your life.

Personally if I was you, I would stay in school, if you want to be a musician after that you still can. You have just over a year to go (a year is nothing) but if you get your **** together you could easily turn your grades around. People tend to begin studing hard from Christmas in 6th so you have loads of time to make sure ye do well

crotalus667

Just go there are ton's of places you can do a leaving cert if you want to go back in you 20' or 30's if you want to make money form the music biz your going to have to graft 6-7 nites a week playing some dives or busking but it can be done , fallow the dream and see where it takes you your un happy now what have you got to lose , who knows mayde a year or two out is what you need

Lollipops23

OP, i understand how difficult it is to make potentially life-changing decisions at 17/18-personally i think it's ridiculous to put that amount of pressure on a teenager!
It's always easy to go for the more appealing choice-moving to Cork to be a musician,but don't think that it would be as fun and glamorous as yo initially thought.The business is really hard, and there's feck all money in it unless you hit the big-time and, much as i hate to burst your bubble, that's not likey to happen.
I think you should stick with the LC-if you leave now you'll never go back. See a career advisor in your school, he or she will be able to direct you towards courses/careers that you might be good at and this will give you something to work towards and help motivate you!
Good luck!!

littlefriend

Stay and do your leaving cert. You will regret it in every way if you don't. Not only will you be embarrassed that you don't have what is now considered a basic education you will also have to take crap jobs with crap pay forever. You will watch ppl who are less bright and talented overtake you because they have a degree/diploma or leaving cert at least.

Could you go to do 6th year in your original school? Maybe sit down with your parents and tell them exactly how you are feeling. They are probably dying to help you but don't know how. They could speak to the Principle on your behalf and then you could all make a plan on how you can catch up and how to keep yourself motivated.

Probably 50% of ppl mess around in 5th year - you do have enough time to turn this around. If you are getting C's and D's with no effort then with a bit of commitment you can easily make these B's at least. Could you get some grinds or extra tuition between now and June 09? This can be really really helpful - especially if you can do some every week. If your parents aren't in a position to pay for these then maybe you could get a summer job and save some money for them. Also, your teachers may help. It reflects badly on them if you don't do well so it is in their interests to give you a little extra help if they can.

You sound like you feel a bit worthless, apart from the help of a counsellor, standing up and turning your own life around will give you a bit of confidence and self esteem. Don't throw your life away because of this girl. Chances are she just got a bit freaked out when you were so reliant on her. Build yourself up, study hard and who knows where that will take you. The world is your oyster - you just have to put in a little work first so that you can make the most of all it has to offer.

Good Luck

NotMe

littlefriend wrote: »

Stay and do your leaving cert. You will regret it in every way if you don't. Not only will you be embarrassed that you don't have what is now considered a basic education you will also have to take crap jobs with crap pay forever.

That's just plain not true. My younger brother dropped out of school in 5th year and worked full time in McDonalds. After a couple of years he started an apprenticeship as an electrician and is now fully qualified and pretty happy with his life. He's doing better than me at the moment and I did great in my LC and got into my first choice in college. :rolleyes: Having no LC isn't the end of the world anyway.

littlefriend

NotMe wrote: »

That's just plain not true. My younger brother dropped out of school in 5th year and worked full time in McDonalds. After a couple of years he started an apprenticeship as an electrician and is now fully qualified and pretty happy with his life. He's doing better than me at the moment and I did great in my LC and got into my first choice in college. :rolleyes: Having no LC isn't the end of the world anyway.

Sorry yes I suppose it was a bit of a sweeping statement. It wasn't meant to cause any offense. Its just that anyone I know that dropped out of school went on to regret big time in it one way or another.

Bloody_Rootz

Im like you I won't do anything im unhappy doing..drop out and goto cork whats the worst that can happen? lifes too short man dont waste ur time in school...I was in top class with great marks but i dropped out at 15 and i can assure you i never once regreted it even 3 years later..and im happy keep in mind happy is more important than a "good job" (lol) anyway drop out im the devil on ur shoulder drop out drop out :cool:

oh and btw "NotMe" your an idiot no offence lol i seen ppl with leving certs working dead end jobs u fool..

Eviledna

If you finish your leaving cert this year, you will have something to say that you achieved in spite of all that has happened. If you drop out now, it will be doing the easier of the two options, perhaps giving you short term happiness, but it will always be the thing that you didn't achieve, and may indeed hold you back in ways you never expected. If you fancy the idea of a trade, then it won't make too much difference as you will have 4 years extra training between now and qualification anyway. But if music is your life, and you really intend to make it in the business against all the odds, think of how not having the leaving cert will seem to those that might work with you.

Ponder this possible scenario: you find your perfect band immediately when you move to Cork, they are all a bit older than you but they play/write the music you have longed to play. They ask you what you do. You say you play music. They ask you what jobs you've worked, you'll tell them. They'll ask you about your education, you'll say, I don't have the leaving cert. They might think, yeah, he can play, but is he committed? He dropped out of the leaving cert, we all did that, we knew how crappy it was and how it seemed of no consequence at the time, but we slogged through it to prove that when we set our minds to something we do it. This is also our attitude to our band. Now how can we know if this guy can commit to anything? He isn't proven, he quit something when it got hard. We know he can play, we know he would play if we gave him a chance, but would he fit in? We are all really determined people, and this guy just doesn't seem like us.

Now granted, that is one of many scenarios. When it boils down to it, you can quit two months ahead knowing all that is gone by and all the reasons you did, but no one else will ever really understand the complexity and will just assume you couldn't hack it. But you can. If you rise above this, get those exams, despite everything, you will feel as if you have conquered the situation and you are ready for life in the Music industry, with all the rejection and uncertainty that it holds. You will be proven.

You can do it. Just do your best and you will own every ounce of success that is waiting for you. Best of luck.

LegacyUser

Hey guys,

Thanks for all the great info, reading through it all made me realise following my heart mightent give me the best outcome in life right now. So Im gonna go in and give it my best shot. Even if I dont do well in my leaving its better than not having it at all.


So thank you all for the great replies, its always good to have somewhere to go to talk to people who were in the same position as I.

NotMe

Bloody_Rootz wrote: »

oh and btw "NotMe" your an idiot no offence lol i seen ppl with leving certs working dead end jobs u fool..

Good for you.

ciaran2008

Everyone is telling you to stay. . I think there is more to life than education, books and more books! Realistically if your grades are poor then they won’t be much use to you so remember that! If your talking months left of leaving cert. . . apply yourself as hard as you can! I know it’s not as easy as that but realistically it can be done and you have time to improve.

On the other hand I'm 17 aswel and despise school but I still drag myself in and stay motivated by the fact that I don't have long left! You only live once and again seriously education is not everything!

This is a decision that only you can make and not randomers on a public form. Although people are saying 'how many people make it' etc according to you it’s your best skill and it would be a shame to waste it mate!

Zen 2nd

NotMe wrote: »

Good for you.

Bloody_Rootz named the wrong person. He must feel a bit awkward for calling you the idiot.

To the opening poster. There is no point contemplating school when you don't even go to it anyway and can't be persuaded to go since it isn't fun. Give the music thing a shot, if that doesn't work out look at your options and go with whatever you want. Just remember to keep moving forward and not to get stuck with the "I'd love to do that but..." mind set.

Eviledna

DontHaveAClue wrote: »

Hey guys,

Thanks for all the great info, reading through it all made me realise following my heart mightent give me the best outcome in life right now. So Im gonna go in and give it my best shot. Even if I dont do well in my leaving its better than not having it at all.


So thank you all for the great replies, its always good to have somewhere to go to talk to people who were in the same position as I.

Well done, an excellent decision! You can do it, use every resource that you have from now until then (the internet is great for helping you figure out the things that teachers can't;)) and give it your best shot. What you are doing takes great courage and I commend you. Not long now until you can look back at all this and think, wow, I nearly gave up, but I'm stronger than that:)

Bloody_Rootz

opps lol silly mistake im new to forums i read all the posts and went back to that one but picked wrong name anyway very sorry not me anyway ok ur sticking it out well good luck i wont says it a bad decision if u only have a lil while left might aswell finish it but there are alot of sterotypes about school leavers and i know first hand very wealthy people that never finished school and i have had no probs getting jobs or whatever even been offered very high pay jobs

Framed10

have you a career guidance teacher in your school?

I know some schools have very good guidance counsellors who are very good listeners and help you out and give you some great advice and the best path to take

you would be surprised that when a teacher knows that you are having difficulty coping they can help you out with ways to study, encounragement etc.
I know it depends on the school and the teachers etc but some can be very helpful

have you looked into some home tuition through your school?
talk to you career teacher or any other person in your school that you would be comfortable with.
good luck

vincenzo1975

unless you are a very talented musician, who can write, perform and network , you will find it very hard to sustain a life by the music industry alone. It is a very competative and tough environment, dont be fooled by the dream.

What you should do is restart 5th year with a long term goal. Find out what courses are available on the media and technical side of music, what arts courses are available, where you can make a serious living in the music and media sector, and use that as a motivation to get through the last two years of school.

You are in a privledged situation of knowing what you want to do, but do it right. There will be plenty of time for Cork and other towns, now you need your education.

If you dont get your education, you will end up a bum, at least have something to fall back on.

Try and talk to real musictions on the circuit to see how hard it is and what it takes to succeed.

GET ONTO THE MUSIC FORUM AND ASK THE SAME QUESTION ABOVE AND SEE WHAT RESPONSE YOU GET FROM PEOPLE WHO DO THIS FOR A LIVING.

Marksie

Bloody rootz: As you claim to be new at internet forums i suggest you read the charter about personal abuse in PI.

As you apologised having said it to the wrong person, i will forgo infracting you. Plus its a nice day.

Its a friendly warning though

colly10

Bloody_Rootz wrote: »

Im like you I won't do anything im unhappy doing..drop out and goto cork whats the worst that can happen? lifes too short man dont waste ur time in school...I was in top class with great marks but i dropped out at 15 and i can assure you i never once regreted it even 3 years later..and im happy keep in mind happy is more important than a "good job" (lol) anyway drop out im the devil on ur shoulder drop out drop out :cool:

oh and btw "NotMe" your an idiot no offence lol i seen ppl with leving certs working dead end jobs u fool..

Your still only 18 and dropping out would not really negatively affect you at this stage. You may feel a bit differently in a few years. Yes happiness is more important than a good job but will you be happy if you end up working in a **** job for the rest of your life. The money doesn't really matter but i've found that in badly paid jobs the work is more boring and you tend to take more **** off your bosses