help

hitcher

Well hello everybody. Basically I have a very unusual situation. I am a guy and recently I have found myself attracted to another guy in my year. The thing is, I'm not gay though. Maybe I'm bi, but I don't really know. I'm confused on that front now though, as this is the first time I've been attracted to a guy. I was never attracted to guys before, but since falling for him perhaps I'm a little more open to that. But anyways...as I said I have really fallen for this guy, and I have a big crush I suppose you'd say. It started out as noticing that he was good looking and then somehow it developed into actually liking him. He isn't gay either, and I know he's had many girlfriends but sometimes I really think he likes me too. I've noticed him looking at me sometimes, and there are times when it seems he tries to sit near to me. Like in one class I sit beside his table, but someone sits between us (does that make sense? lol). But when the person between us is out he'll sit in that place so in effect beside me. When he does it he won't really talk to me though. He might ask about something I have with me or maybe some notes he missed, but never a full blown conversation. Maybe it's just wishful thinking but sometimes it just seems that he wants to get near to me. Another good example was last week when we had assembly. There are always different rows to stand in, and he usually doesn't stand in the same as mine. But this week he seemed to be standing as close as possible to me. While we were waiting for our teacher he was standing really close to me the whole time, and he's never done that before. Do you think it's all in my head? Sometimes I'll notice him look over at me if we have the same class, and I'll do the same. Or when we're in the corridor we'll make eye contact. But then sometimes I get absolutely nothing...he talks about girls alot and he seems to have a new girlfriend every 2nd week. So I am really confused. I really don't know how I'd ask him about the whole thing. What if he doesn't? I'd never be able to face him again if I told him and he didn't feel the same. Then everyone would think I'm gay or bi or whatever, and I don't want that. But if he likes me he probably feels exactly the same. I guess we both have alot to lose. I don't know why I'm posting this here though...I suppose there's not much help or advice you can give other than "Just ask him". The thing is it's just really not that easy...I don't know what to do! Do you think it's possible for him to actually like me if he doesn't appear to be gay??

qz

To be honest, it sounds as if it's a one-sided affair and he's not on the same wavelength as you. People make eye-contact all the time in passing, it doesn't mean anything. And maybe he was just being nice by sitting near to you when the guy who normally sat with you was absent. I also think that you're reading too much into his glances, or when he's standing close to you at the assembly.

Of course it's possible that he likes you, but from what you say of his relationships with multiple girls, it doesn't bode well for a possible romance with yourself.
Sorry, but I wouldn't say anything if it were me.

tolosenc

Point out to him that he keeps glancing at you and jokingly ask him if he's "gay or something". Use his reaction to judge for yourself.

hitcher

so any more help

togster

hitcher it's very hard to take this seriously. Some of your other posts suggest you are tran-gender and already have a boyfriend. On the off chance you are serious, its very unlikely this guy likes you. Won't your current bf be jealous?

Shelli

From your post you sound like your still in school?? Correct?

TBH, for your own safety I wouldn't say anything, boys can be so cruel and you could be opening yourself up to a world of hurt.

I know it's not the "brave" thing to do, but how well do you know this guy?? If he was a close friend it would be different, but it sound like you dont really know him. How would you feel if you were wrong and he went and told everyone?? I'm sure lots of people would shrug it off, but you can also be sure that there will be some small minded bullies who will just love a good piece of juicy gossip.....girls can be bitchy, but boys can be violent!! I've seen it happen.....just be very careful.